Boyfriend too confusing, horrible relationship problems, Dont know what to do

Fallingapart · Newbie Joined: 10 Feb 2008 Posts: 1

So me and my boyfriend have been dating for about a year now. We seem to have so many problems in our relationship, that sometimes it seems like the argueing, tension and disagreements will never end. We both love eachother and i am desperate to make things work between us. I want to fix all of our problems and i dont think either of us want to break up. My only problem is that he is the most confusing person i've ever met. He has strange mood swings and its almost always impossible to figure out what hes really feeling. Sometimes it will only take me to say a single word wrong or some way offending to him and he'll be angry at me for the rest of the day, no matter how much i apoligize. I want to be happy with him but its so hard when its so easy to piss him off. I feel like everything i do is wrong, and i can never do anything right. Its so frustrating and i feel like crying all the time. Just last night I was talking to him on the phone and i asked him if he still loves me. He said yes, then i said are you sure, and there was a long pause afterwards. So i'm just like, well? do you? and he said "sometimes". I asked him what the hell he was talking about and he said no, i dont love you right now because i'm angry with you. I'm like wtf, arent you supposed to love me all the time unconditionally no matter how annoyed you are at me? His reply was "well, i think differently then other people". I'm not quite sure WHAT to think about that.

Another problem we have is sometimes if i ask him to come over or hang out one day he'll full out reject me and say he doesnt want to see me that day. Actually i shouldnt say sometimes. This happens alot. Almost every time i ask to see him he says he'd rather be alone and he doesnt feel like seeing me. He hardly ever wants to see me outside of school and i dont understand why. He's always wanting to be on his own and it depresses me that he'd rather sit at home doing nothing instead of seeing his girlfriend. Does he just want alot of space or something? I can understand him wanting a break from me every once in a while but we dont see eachother THAT often anyways. We dont even have any classes together.

I just dont know what to do anymore. I've tried talking to him, asking him why he feels this way and all he says is "i dont know" to every question i ask. I just want him to listen to me for once. I feel sick and i dont want to leave him because i love him more then any other guy i've ever met. I just want him to love me and to show it. He isnt even affectionate towards me anymore. He wont even TOUCH me without me cuddling up next to him first. I just want a guy that i know loves me and who actually expresses his feelings. I want a real boyfriend who i can understand and who would never avoid me on purpose. I want a guy who actually WANTS me back. Please help, i need advice on how to deal with this situation without breaking up with him. I probably sound pathetic.

Guest · Guest

reply: im exactly the same with my boyfriend, except the other way around. he says something really little that annoys me and then i feel i dont want to see him for the rest of the day & he constantly annoys me no matter how many times he says sorry. Don't think that you're in the wrong, you deserve someone who loves you. I love my boyfriend more than anything but if your guy is in the same situation as me he probably feels shy or embarrad to tell you the way he feels. Just because he acts this way doesnt mean he doesnt love you hes probably just over sensitive, but he has got to get his head around that there is no 'perfect person' that does everything right all the time. Anyone can tell you that every couple has there ups and downs but its important that you both know you love each other. You need to tell your boyfriend that hes like a closed book and if he cant be bothered to make an effort with you, then why do you have to make an effort with him? If he didnt love you he probably wouldve left by now, but you just need to be calm, show him you love him and try and get him to open up. If not you need to hold your head high and move on.

Guest · Guest

Pool back and stop going after him asking him to do things. It might be that it takes him a while to realize what's going on. But he might end up missing you and start going after you again.

In truth you need to leave this guy and build up your self esteem back. But if you really want to, give it one more shot and follow the advice from above.

DavikHavok · Newbie Joined: 23 Aug 2008 Posts: 6

No offense, but your boyfriend sounds like he may have a more serious problem than you know. If he gets angry at you for no reason at all...maybe he has anger management problems. Ask yourself honestly if you still love this guy. In my opinion, this is a breakup waiting to happen. Questions for you though: 1. is this your first relationship? 2. is this his first relationship and has he been mistreated by other girls in the past? All these psycological aspects can have affects long after the event took place. And if you really want a guy that wants you back (what girl doesn't), then you should probably consider another boyfriend...sorry Sad

Best of luck with your predicament. -David

Boyfriend too confusing, horrible relationship problems, Dont know what to do

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