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nooneknows
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Joined: 18 Jan 2007
Posts: 2
Location: Dallas,Tx
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 Posted: 01/18/07 - 00:55 Post subject: I just registered on this site and have something to say abo |
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| Im 23yrs old, ive been on cry.meth for about 8 months, I have increased my use of meth now to heavy - I re-up 1 or 2 times a week with 50-100 bucks worth. Im alone in this abuse, my friends and family are completely unaware. I find that I AM addicted, and I dont wanna be anymore. The reason why I use this drug is not for the psuedo-Eurphoria that I achieve on a high, not for the alertness/insomnia from the high,but for the relief from the state of feeling hungry. I am completely obsessed about my weight and am NEVER satisfied with myself. This obsession of my weight and physical appearance has ALWAYS controlled my life even before meth. I believe that is my TRUE sickness, not the drug. I dont know where to turn,who to trust to talk to. I dont want my family involved,nor my friends, or anyone who knows me basically,but I do want/need help. I use the power of prayer often,however I think the term "God helps those whom help themselves" has come to play in my life and he is waiting for me to make the first move. I'm an overachieving person whom has come along way from my childhood and have achieved alot of success in my youth. Currently I am employed professionally as a staffing coordinator for a medical contract company in Nephrology. I have a nieve girlfriend of 5yrs, loving friends as well as family. Everyone cares about me SO much and has always been so proud of me, they depend on me to continue to achieve a higher existence and grow furthur in my life's success. To admit my guilt of drug abuse, especially Meth, will turn my life completely around. I am afraid of the loss of trust, shame, de-motion, and I am afraid of the isolation I fear I will get in response to my coming out. Is there anyone out there that can type the words in which I will read and have them hit me hard in my heart, so that I gain the strength to drop this addiction and obsession of my weight. Someone,please tell me what I need to hear.......... |
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jaybone
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Joined: 07 Apr 2007
Posts: 7
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| Posted: 04/07/07 - 02:10 Post subject: do what you gotta do. |
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| do what you gotta do man.what ever makes you happy. |
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GanjRocker
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Joined: 11 Apr 2007
Posts: 24
Location: AmstaDee, Haulindaweed!
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| Posted: 04/12/07 - 22:27 Post subject: Dude yer nuckin futs! |
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First of all don't be so dumub as to fool yourself. The obsession with your weight WAS your sickness- until NOW. TRUST ME! The ICE has a much stronger grip on you now and your life would be billions of times better in the long livin with insecurit about your weight than being addicted to crystal. If you don't believe me, then go ahead, just try and quit. You'll see, METH IS NOW YOUR SICKNESS! Unless your stronger than pretty much every human out there, it's gonna be hard to drop without aid of your family and friends, letting them know is probably the best idea to help quit and if you continue with the Ice, they'll find out sooner or later- guarenteed! Good luck though  |
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Guest
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| Posted: 04/12/07 - 23:42 Post subject: Also Addicted |
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Dude, I'm also in your situation. I to use DAILY. Nobody know YET. I am so tired. I also want / need to stop NOW but I can't. Why do I want to stop something that takes away all my problems?
I need to snap out of this quick. HOW??????????????????????????
Dude, I wish there was someone that can help! |
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NivStar
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Joined: 16 Apr 2007
Posts: 2
Location: Brisbane QLD Aussie
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| Posted: 04/16/07 - 21:55 Post subject: Re: I just registered on this site and have something to say |
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| nooneknows wrote: | | Im 23yrs old, ive been on cry.meth for about 8 months, I have increased my use of meth now to heavy - I re-up 1 or 2 times a week with 50-100 bucks worth. Im alone in this abuse, my friends and family are completely unaware. I find that I AM addicted, and I dont wanna be anymore. The reason why I use this drug is not for the psuedo-Eurphoria that I achieve on a high, not for the alertness/insomnia from the high,but for the relief from the state of feeling hungry. I am completely obsessed about my weight and am NEVER satisfied with myself. This obsession of my weight and physical appearance has ALWAYS controlled my life even before meth. I believe that is my TRUE sickness, not the drug. I dont know where to turn,who to trust to talk to. I dont want my family involved,nor my friends, or anyone who knows me basically,but I do want/need help. I use the power of prayer often,however I think the term "God helps those whom help themselves" has come to play in my life and he is waiting for me to make the first move. I'm an overachieving person whom has come along way from my childhood and have achieved alot of success in my youth. Currently I am employed professionally as a staffing coordinator for a medical contract company in Nephrology. I have a nieve girlfriend of 5yrs, loving friends as well as family. Everyone cares about me SO much and has always been so proud of me, they depend on me to continue to achieve a higher existence and grow furthur in my life's success. To admit my guilt of drug abuse, especially Meth, will turn my life completely around. I am afraid of the loss of trust, shame, de-motion, and I am afraid of the isolation I fear I will get in response to my coming out. Is there anyone out there that can type the words in which I will read and have them hit me hard in my heart, so that I gain the strength to drop this addiction and obsession of my weight. Someone,please tell me what I need to hear.......... |
Sweetheart, if i were next to you right now i'd give you the biggest hug you've ever felt. Just for realising and admitting you DO have a problem.
Regardless of weather it's a drug or weight problem, any call for help is the best thing you could ever do..
I am 28yrs old and WAS an 'ice' addict for 3yrs from age 23. I was so badly addicted I found myself injecting it up to 5-6 times everyday. I lost my job, car, boyfriend (of 9yrs) and soon became someone not even I recognised. My family found out within the last 6mths and they are who guided me through it. I realise you don't want any of your friends or family to know and that's ok but have you thought about what if they do find out.. You may think it wont happen, but this really is a small world hey.. it happens.. anyway just something for you to think about..
If i understand correctly, you seem more concerned about your weight or suppressing your appetite? Are you overweight or just not happy with how you look??
This was how I first became addicted. I hated myself and my look. I will not lie to you and tell you this drug wont make you lose weight. It does. I went from 68kg to 44kg within 8mths. Though I found myself on an anorexia/bulimia yo-yo and ended up looking like a walking skeleton aswell. I would've eaten my insides before i'd put food anywhere near my mouth..
I am now a health 58kg and am not taking any illegal drugs. I simply just needed to get away from them, start accepting myself and not worry about anyone else but myself and my health. No one can help you unless you want it.. And you have to help yourself first.
You may have heard this all before but i'm happy to say it again (lol) it's what you NEED to do.. Those who see you for what you look like and not for WHO you really are, to me are pathetic and not worth knowing. But
Sounds like you have good friends and a loving family. Imagine if this was happening to one of them. Do for yourself what you'd do if it were them.
The one person who pulled my head in in the end, was my 5yr old nephew when he asked my sister if i was dying. You don't want to hear this from someone you love.
I hope I have been of some help to you sweetie. Anytime you want to know more.. let me know.. Take care of you.
NivStar
xoxo
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NivStar
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Joined: 16 Apr 2007
Posts: 2
Location: Brisbane QLD Aussie
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| Posted: 04/16/07 - 22:02 Post subject: Re: Also Addicted |
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| Guest wrote: | Dude, I'm also in your situation. I to use DAILY. Nobody know YET. I am so tired. I also want / need to stop NOW but I can't. Why do I want to stop something that takes away all my problems?
I need to snap out of this quick. HOW??????????????????????????
Dude, I wish there was someone that can help! |
Babe same advice to you as i gave to nooneknows..
Take care of you and good luck. You DO have strength, you just need to use it.
xoxo |
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Guest
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| Posted: 04/23/07 - 00:28 Post subject: your mom |
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| crybaby.the only person that can manage your life is you,willpower use it. |
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GanjRocker
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Joined: 11 Apr 2007
Posts: 24
Location: AmstaDee, Haulindaweed!
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| Posted: 04/24/07 - 22:08 Post subject: |
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| Willpower!? Dude, you don't know crystal. |
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Guest
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| Posted: 05/08/07 - 15:28 Post subject: |
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It will be the hardest thing u will ever do. will power roflmao you dont just stop this ****!
**edited by moderator** |
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nooneknows
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Joined: 18 Jan 2007
Posts: 2
Location: Dallas,Tx
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| Posted: 12/31/07 - 15:37 Post subject: I am back almost a year later and have an update about my me |
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| Thank you ALL whom have responded to my cry for help. Especially you NivStar!!! You wrote those kinds words to me and I felt like I could actually hear you speaking them. I have not used meth now for 10 months, I have lost all contact with my suppliers. I quit cold turkey, I just stopped. I stopped because in Febuary, my girlfriend and I planned to move in with each other in our own house. I could not take the meth with me. I decided once I left my apartment, I would leave the meth there and behind me. We moved into our home together and I took a week off of work to sleep and re-energize. I have never felt SOOOO fatigued in my life...I could sleep and sleep and still be sooo tired. It probaly was not until May when I began to just feel fine and normal again. I have gained ALOT of weight. I gained about 60lbs of fat over the past 10 months. Only now, here in December 2007 do I actually feel blessed, returned and clean. I can begin to work on my weight the right way. Our God is almighty and trusts us to make the right choices, therefore he has given us the right to chose. I chose life and soberiety. What do you chose? |
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