I think he's hiding something.

CqCq · Newbie Joined: 05 Mar 2007 Posts: 5

My boyfriend was in the shower one day & me being nosy decided to look through his phone. Well I went through his text and someone by the name "ugly" messaged him saying "i miss you why dont we have lunch" In his sent box he sent back "No thanks" So I thought everything was fine but then for Spring Break we went to Mexico. Well again I looked at his phone because he was texting while we were up there and "ugly" wrote "I miss you and need to talk to you" and he wrote "im sorry in Mexico I'll call you when I get home" Then when we got home I decided to get "uglys" number so I did and had my friend call it. Its his ex girlfriend! That he swears he doesnt talk to anymore. How can I bring this up? I mean am I in the wrong for being nosy? He can totally turn this around on me and say I dont trust him. How do I bring this up?

HayLee14 · Newbie Joined: 16 Feb 2007 Posts: 46

Hi, so i think that u need to inform ur bf u know. If he say's u don't trust him tell him how am i supposed to. Turst is earned not handed. Also tell him he shouldnt be talking to her now because he is with u,. or u can always get on ur cell phone provider's web site and block her. good luck!! Razz

Xtreme supreme · Posted: 04/05/07 - 19:02 Post subject:

tell him that he shouldnt be talking to his ex girlfriend because it makes you feel uncomfortable. if he loves you very much then he would agree and do whatever is best and makes you happy =]

pimp13in13compton · Newbie Joined: 01 Jul 2007 Posts: 2

wtf is yourroblem looking threw is phone! u read it the first time and it said something anlongthe lines of "i miss u we need to talk......" and then your b/f replied no thanks. that is sooooo messed up u still kept snooping

angel baby · Newbie Joined: 01 May 2006 Posts: 140 Location: Washington

IT DOES SOUND LIKE HE HAS ALREADY TOLD HER HE DOESNT WANT TO TALK TO HER. BUT THEN IN THE 2ND MESSAGE HE SAYS HE WILL CALL HER WHEN HE GETS BACK. YOU NEED TO CAUSALLY ASK HIM IF THERE IS ANYTHING GOING ON WITH HIM AND HIS EX. IF HE SAYS NO ASK WHY SHE KEEPS TRING TO TALK TO HIM. HE PROBABLY WILL GET MAD BUT YOU DESERVE TO KNOW IF HE IS STEPPING OUT ON YOU. YOU CANT TRUST SOMEONE WHO IS DOING STUFF HE KNOWS YOU WONT LIKE BEHIND YOUR BACK. MY BF HAS LEARNED TO BE HONEST WITH ME NOW. HE WORKS AT A PLACE WHERE A LOT OF REALLY PRETTY WOMEN HIT ON HIM AND HE ALWAYS TELLS ME. CAUSE HE WANTS TO PROVE TO ME THAT HE IS LOYAL TO ME AND IS HAPPY WITH ME. ME AND HIM HAVE HAD A LOT OF TRUST ISSUES BEFORE. IF NOTHING IS GOING ON YOU GUYS WILL FIND A WAY TO WORK AROUND IT WITH OUT YOU HAVING TO GO BEHIND HIS BACK AND BLOCKING CALLS. DONT TRY AND DO WHAT HES DOING TO YOU.. IT WILL JUST CAUSE WAY MORE PROBLEMS. JUST TALK TO HIM CALMLY. HOPE I HELPED IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS FOR ME IM HERE TO LISTEN AND GIVE YOU MY BEST ANSWER!

SolaarPleure · Newbie Joined: 24 Jun 2007 Posts: 20

Ex-girlfriends can be real b*****s.

My boyfriend's ex-girlfriend was a real piece of work, and went through every possible way of getting him back (she broke up with him) and I'm pretty sure she still wants to. For example, she sent him a four page letter detailing how in love with him she was--after she had learned he and I were dating and cancelled what she had hoped would be a "romantic rendevous"--constantly guilted him to try and force him to stay close to her, et cetera.

I had never liked her, and I told my boyfriend, but made absolutely certain not to tell him I wanted him to stop speaking to her--this is where I tie in with your story. With most guys I've dated, telling them what to do leads to resentment and bitterness later. Indeed, although I told him repeatedly he could be friends with anyone he wanted, he still felt some resentment toward me because he felt like he had "no choice" but to distance himself from the ex--although he had already expressed a desire to put distance between them.

My recommended plan of action is to ask him if he's had any contact with his ex lately. If he lies about it or asks why, explain that you were curious who he had been texting, that you felt terrible, and inquire further. She may be using guilt to keep him close to her--it seems like a lot of boys have an obsession with being the "rescuer" and if that's the case it's best to try to trust him (and it's hard, especially if you've been cheated on) and let him work it out himself. Don't hide your feelings, make sure he knows them, but try not to tell him what to do either.

I think he's hiding something.

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