abstinence_is_best
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 Posted: 03/07/07 - 18:22 Post subject: Re: Is masterbation a sin? |
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| Noobster wrote: | | im a 14 year old guy and im getting confermation done soon. And its really been bugging me if masterbation is a sin. plz help me! |
I'm assuming that you are Catholic because you say you are having your Confirmation, which is the fourth Sacrament in the Church. I encourage you to go to confession. Don't hesitate to ask the priest anything you want. I can promise you that you have no reason to be embarrassed or scared, because he has heard the same things from everyone else and has also heard much worse things that people have done. Priests don't judge and they don't ever talk about what they hear. There have been priests in the past who were put to death for not telling what they heard in the confessional. But anyway, congratulations on your confirmation! This is a great gift where you are sealed by the Holy Spirit as a full member of Christ's Church. I am very Catholic and also teach catechism classes for the pre-confirmation group.
To answer your question, just like everything else, masturbation can be a sin, but it depends on your intentions. Many people think that religion says sex is bad, but that is far from the truth! God created us to be very sexual and wants us to fully enjoy our sexuality! But just like everything else in life, there are proper places and proper times for everything. God created us to be married so a man and a woman can fully enjoy and respect each other as one flesh. God created us as man and woman, and if you think about it, if you take either one, a man or a woman, by themselves, their body doesn't make much sense. It isn't until you put them together as husband and wife that all the parts of the two different bodies make sense and work together for specific purposes.
The Catechism says this about masturbation: "To form an equitable judgment about the subjects' moral responsibility and to guide pastoral action, one must take into account the affective immaturity, force of acquired habit, conditions of anxiety or other psychological or social factors that lessen, if not even reduce to a minimum, moral culpability."
If a person masturbates for no other reason than just to take advantage of their body's sexuality and knows that they shouldn't, then yes, it can be a mortal sin. But when a person is still young and maturing in their sexuality, it is a normal part of human development and is healthy for the time, and it is not a sin. That doesn't mean that you can do it as much as you want now though, because that would be taking advantage of it, however, sometimes it just happens when we are teenagers, and that's okay.
Just remember that masturbation is not God's purpose for our sexuality. When you feel tempted to masturbate, just pray and ask God for strength because you want to save your sexuality and enjoy it the way He wants you to. Get your mind off of it and get busy doing something else, and you'll forget all about it. When it does happen, don't feel too guilty, as long as you are trying your best, everyone still slips here and there. Even in this case, it is still a venial sin, but not a mortal sin. That means that you can say an Act of Contrition and still receive Communion when you go to Mass, and your venial sins are forgiven. It is also just a venial sin if it is a serious habit. God understands habits, and as long as you realize that you should try to do it less, and try your best, then it is not a mortal sin.
If there is a time when you feel like it was a mortal sin, perhaps because you were looking at pornography just because you had an opportunity (as opposed to accidentally coming across it and being curious) and you were having extremely lustful thoughts about the person like "if I could, I would," then that time it is probably a mortal sin. It is okay to be attracted to another person, but seriously lusting after another person is a mortal sin because you are disrespecting their sexuality and them as a person, because you are only seeing them as an object of pleasure and sex. If you feel like you have committed a mortal sin, then it is important to go to confession as soon as possible. For any sin to be a mortal sin, the person must know that what they are doing is a mortal sin, and go along with it and do it consciously by their own free will.
Venial sins are just imperfections, little things that we do because we are human and are not perfect. Mortal sins, however, go directly against God's will (such as the 10 commandments) and actually separate ourselves from God's grace. (God doesn't separate us, we separate ourselves by sinning!) But thanks to Jesus, God will now easily forgive us, and the best way to do that is by going to confession. Jesus gave the bishops and the priests the responsibility of forgiving sins when He said to the Apostles "Whoever's sin you forgive will be forgiven, and whoever's sin you don't forgive, will not be forgiven." The priest cannot forgive our sins unless he knows what they are, so we have to let him know.
You don't have to be too specific if you are embarrassed, but remember, he hears stuff like this hundreds of times and he wants to forgive you and help you. Start by saying "Bless me Father, for I have sinned, it has been (amount of time) since my last confession (or this is my first) and since then I have..." and then you'd want to say any mortal sins you've done and about how many times, and anything else that you have questions about or aren't sure of. The priest will always be very helpful and kind. Remember not to keep anything secret just because you don't want to say it. If you forget to say something, then that's okay. but if you intentionally hold something back, then God won't forgive you for that sin because you are not truly sorry for it, and even though the priest absolves you, God is the one who is doing the forgiving, the priest is just a spokesman for Jesus. Anyone can say they are sorry for sinning, but by confessing your sins to another person you aren’t just saying you are sorry you are showing that you are sorry. If you have a mortal sin on your soul, you should not receive communion until you have gone to confession.
So don’t worry too much at your age, just do the best you can. As you get older, try to masturbate less and less so it won’t be as great of a temptation, and you can focus on saving sexual acts until you are married and can enjoy sexual acts the way God intended, and then it will be even more meaningful and special, and not just “finally getting some.”
Remember not to let people intimidate you or try to belittle or change your religious beliefs. The Church and its beliefs have been criticized and attacked since day one.
If you have any more questions about the Church or sins or sexuality or anything, please just ask and I will be glad to help. |
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