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Fender
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Joined: 30 Jul 2007
Posts: 93
Location: New Jersey
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 Posted: 09/03/07 - 09:37 Post subject: My girlfriend is VERY spoiled |
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All her life her parents got her everything she wanted. She frequently goes out and buys a lot. Just the other day she got a whole new wardrobe, and a few pairs of shoes. Now today she is expecting me to take her out to get this new pair of shoes she wants.
Honestly, i draw the line there.
No!
One, im not to keen on spoiling, i dont generally like it
I tried talking to her about it. Eased into it, told her that she is kind of spending a lot of money (im not made out of money ya know). Then i started talking about spoiling and said that i really don't like that she is so spoiled and expects to get whatever she wants whenever she wants.
She said she wasn't spoiled.. 
Now i'm not going to up and leave her. I love her, that's not the problem here.
I just need her to relax on my paycheck 
She constantly denys she is spoiled. How can i open her eyes and show her that what she is doing is just...un-needed
Any response would be nice.. |
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KevDS
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Joined: 06 Aug 2007
Posts: 78
Location: British Columbia
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| Posted: 09/03/07 - 13:00 Post subject: |
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Hi Fender,
Bit of a tough spot to be in for sure. My ex was very similar. I ended up splitting with her for other reasons, but her acting spoiled never helped. I racked my brain after talking with her about it and getting nowhere. We have alot of parks where I live and decided to get her out into nature more. Also took her swimming and a few other fun activities. Basically I tried to show her there was more to life than the newest fashions and the funds associated with them. In the end, she was a bit better, but I realized something. You can't change someone whe does not wish to be changed. I would suggest you simply stand your ground. Give her no money at all. Take her out to an inexpensive dinner once in a while. Take her out to a nice dinner on special occasions. Would she still be around if the cashflow was cut? Is it you, or the money she wants? Only one way to find out for sure. Noone wants to date a mercenary.
This may not all apply to your situation. Only you know what is really going on. Trust your intuition. Offer yourself to her, but her money should come from her own paycheck. This may all seem a bit harsh, but if you want things to change, you have to put the foot down.
BTW.. I've read a good few of your posts on here and you give sound advice. What would your advice be to someone else in your situation? |
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Fender
Newbie
Joined: 30 Jul 2007
Posts: 93
Location: New Jersey
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| Posted: 09/03/07 - 21:09 Post subject: |
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Thank you very much for the response!  Funny thing about it. I was checking my email at my local cafe on my laptop and my ladies eyes caught the "My girlfriend is VERY spoiled". Haha bit of a scene i had to control.
You are spot on with your advice however. She said that she can put the fashion behind her, or rather, behind MY paycheck. We are going on a nice walk with the dogs tommorow. I really appreciate the advice.
Thank you for the compliment on my advice! I always sort of had a natural talent when it came to helping people, and i enjoy it very much.
Look foward to previous posts of yours!
Thanks so much !
-Fender |
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KevDS
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Joined: 06 Aug 2007
Posts: 78
Location: British Columbia
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| Posted: 09/04/07 - 00:58 Post subject: |
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Sounds like it all went over well. Glad to hear it 
Flexibility is the underappreciated brother of compromise. Sounds like you guys are putting both into practice. Good work both of you!
Cheers |
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