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susi261
Newbie
Joined: 17 Feb 2007
Posts: 8
Location: buffalo, ny
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 Posted: 02/28/07 - 22:32 Post subject: WHAT SHOULD THIS BE LIKE THIS MARRIAGE THING?? |
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| Hi, I wont go on and on, just make my points, I have been married for 27 years with 3 children to a wonderful man. well I thought he was wonderful, in the past two years our relationsship has dwindled down to a brother and sister relationship. we dont have sex and havent been intimate for about a year. we do have a young child age 9 who takes up alot of time our older kids are on there own more seeing there in there twentys. heres the thing, my husband says I dont do my "wifely dutys by having sex or being sexy". I have gained alot of weight and feel very unattractive. and he shows no signs of being attracted to me!. he says Im not nice of a person and Im a taker and not a giver, now this makes me laugh, because I own a hair salon where everyone is friendly, and smiling Im personalble person always have been, I like people and I loove to laugh and fool around, my husband is quiet in a crowd and is judmental anyways if they smoke or something he "doesnt like them". anyways. I need someones opinion on this subject?. can you save a marriage where theres no sex?, no affecition towards one another? just pass in the nite inbetween doing homework with my daughter and then goodnite he gets up early and I dont. I tried to make dates for movies and nothing happens I tried to make a nite out over nite and nothing comes of it?. so maybe Im done??. I miss affection I know I seem distant sometimes but like I said did you ever go on a blind date and you get bad vibes?, like they dont want to be with you??, thats what I get... all the time... thanks for listening and write me soon to see what you think I should do as a wife.. and by the way Ive taken care of the kids the most when they are sick or school projects or friends problems or conferences, I love my kids and would be there for anything.. |
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Jenny
Site Admin
Joined: 03 Mar 2006
Posts: 603
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| Posted: 03/01/07 - 03:32 Post subject: |
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Hi Susi,
Has your husband always been like this or this started happening in the last few years. It seems to me that you are doing a great job both with your children and trying around your husband but somehow he fails to see it or seems uninterested in what you have to offer.
Some men are just like that, I don't know ...maybe to some it comes with age. As we get older, we turn into children and need more attention. Maybe this is what's happening with your husband. Maybe he needs more attention now but he also seems to refuse it when offered.
You didn't say how old you both were but it seems you have quite a history of being married for 27 years. |
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susi261
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Joined: 17 Feb 2007
Posts: 8
Location: buffalo, ny
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| Posted: 03/01/07 - 08:02 Post subject: |
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Hi Jenny, I am 48 he is 49, I think thats to young to be without relations?? I dont know what to think, we have been to a marriage councelor in the past few years but he doesnt really open up? I truly think he is uninterested in me because Im heavy and he turns that into "Im not nice". honestly.. I really and considerate and nice, sometimes I get angry if things are not done in the house yanno? when I get home from work but on the whole I like to talk and laugh and have a good time. I feel like I NEVER get attention, except of course holidays and my birthday, maybe he does these out of obligation?? thanks for listening Im just trying to figure out what I reallly have done wrong?. I dont feel like Im a bad wife. Sus  |
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