addicted to laxatives

Hello.
I have the biggest problem in my life ever. I am 22, female. I have 59 kg and 165 cm tall. I think I am fat, although my family and my friends tell me I am not... however, most is in my head. The bigger problem is, that I got addicted to drugs, actually laxatives. I somehow perceive laxatives as drugs, now. I have been taking four laxatives a day for the last year in order to loose weight. Now I am getting to the point where I panic if I don’t have any left. I admit, I am addicted. Please, help me!

Hello!
This is first and very big, but not last step when person admits his or hers addiction. It is a great thing that you have supportive family and friends, but you will need a help from a professional. There is a lot of help available and you should discuss with your GP whether you can be referred for specialist, psychological support. Remember, you are very lucky to have such a supportive family and friends!
It is nothing strange that you say, you are addicted to drugs- laxatives are drugs. The bowel becomes depended on laxatives and you become constipated with laxative use. You literally became addicted to laxatives, and 1 year is quite a period, because the bowel loses its normal tone and motion.
I think you do not have problem with your weight or obesity, considering form what you told us (59 kg and 165 cm), but I think you have problems with low self esteem and perhaps emotional problems. If you want to loose weight, you need to learn to love yourself. Low self-esteem and emotional problems can give rise to all kinds of disturbed eating habits and until you tackle these successfully you will never achieve long-term weight loss! So, girl, LOVE YOUR SELF!
As said above, there are few way to quit laxatives, either by cutting on them slowly or stopping at once.
If you decide for the gentle version- cutting on laxatives slowly, make a plan, where you will calculate the reducing of laxatives.
With second option, you will have to readjust your diet or else you are likely to suffer from constipation. In your case, since you are taking them year and more, this will be quite a problem, and you will have besides mental, also physical problems: your stomach and bowels will be unused to dealing with food unaided. You do need to increase the fibre in your diet but it is important to do this in a safe way (do nor excessive amounts of wheatbran, because wheatbran passes unchanged through your body but as it does, it can leech out vital nutrients such as calcium). Start diet with peeled fruit and vegetables. Gradually build up to raw fruit and vegetables. Contain with cereals containing oatbran and other higher fibre foods, such as potatoes, rice and bread.
In both cases it is good to receive help from specialists.
Remember what I said earlier! LOVE YOURSELF! THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THERAPY!

I went to a counselor and she helped me alot. BUT you have to search for the kind of counselor that you feel like talking to.

That is a symptom of Bulimia.

ur a 'non purging Bulimic'
get help.
wish you all the luck in the world ( im bulimic)
xx