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ladedaland
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Joined: 30 Aug 2006
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Posted: 08/30/06 - 17:04 Post subject: bad sexual experience, advice appreciated |
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a couple of years ago i had a bad experience with a boy (i was 16 he was 20) where he didnt exactly force himself on me (as i never said no) but didnt ask for permission (had he asked i would deffinatly said no) and i was basically terrified - to the point of crying. he didnt rape me but touched me and performed oral sex on me which i absolutly hated and felt naucious, and now whenever i think of anyone getting close (not sex but oral sex specifically) or see intimacy on tv i feel sickened and embarassed, i realise this is probably the consiquence of said experience but i wondered if anyone else had had a similar expereince and if so did they 'get over it in time' or would councelling ect be a good idea?
help would be appreciated
thanks |
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ravenwingedangel
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Posted: 08/30/06 - 20:47 Post subject: |
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| Have you spoken a friend or family member about this? Someone close to you, that you trust and can confide in? Some things are easier for some people to get over than others. I'm far from a professional, but I'd definitely suggest counseling, if you don't feel you have someone close to you that you can talk to and trust with this.. |
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gretta
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Posted: 09/01/06 - 12:34 Post subject: |
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| hey! the same thing had happened to me when i was about 13 and he was 16. we never accually had sex but he would finger me and i would try to stop him. just like you said, you cant really call it rape but i did try to stop him. i am now 18 and untill now i had felt very uncomfortable and scared about getting intimate with anyone else. but then i found my boyfriend who respects me and gives me all the space i need.. after i realized i could trust him we started to get intimate and now i faced my fear that i once had and i am no longer scared or feel uncomfortable.. im not sure if any of this information will help you or make you feel better but i think when you find the one who you love and can trust you will feel so much better and not so scared |
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lschrandt
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Joined: 02 Mar 2008
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Posted: 03/02/08 - 16:57 Post subject: Re: bad sexual experience, advice appreciated |
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| ladedaland wrote: | a couple of years ago i had a bad experience with a boy (i was 16 he was 20) where he didnt exactly force himself on me (as i never said no) but didnt ask for permission (had he asked i would deffinatly said no) and i was basically terrified - to the point of crying. he didnt rape me but touched me and performed oral sex on me which i absolutly hated and felt naucious, and now whenever i think of anyone getting close (not sex but oral sex specifically) or see intimacy on tv i feel sickened and embarassed, i realise this is probably the consiquence of said experience but i wondered if anyone else had had a similar expereince and if so did they 'get over it in time' or would councelling ect be a good idea?
help would be appreciated
thanks | My Dear Girl, I hate to say this but you were a victim of rape! The guy should have been reported immediately! Just because you didn't scream and run away (obviously you were "frozen" and in shock). You definitely require counceling and IT IS A MUST that you get it. This post is pretty old but hopefully you will have done something to protect yourself from future attacks. No matter what has happened, ALWAYS, ALWAYS, remember that it IS NOT/WAS NOT your fault. The guys should be taken off the streets though I'll give you that. Hopefully someone has made that happen and he hasn't continued to terrorize young girls and escape prosecution. Best of luck to you - I hope you're healing is successful and you are able to let it come from within! |
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