cant get hard for girlfriend

newquestion23 · Newbie Joined: 16 Mar 2008 Posts: 1

hi im 18 and have been really steady with this one girl for a couple months. the comfort level between us is very great and i dont get to nervous or anything. everytime we try something that deals with pleasuring me. blowjob handjob. i cant get errect. im frustrated because if im at home and masterbating i can get hard instantly and finish. i dont know if that i have been masterbating for a long time has harmed this and made it so that i only get stimulated looking at something rather than being touched. any help would really be appriechiated on this topic. i dont know what to do. watching a video of a girl stripping can get me off but when my girlfriend is on top of me and i find her very attractive and shes undressing i cant get hard. do i have a problem?

VICTUSVITA · Newbie Joined: 16 Mar 2008 Posts: 16 Location: colorado

You have in effect trained yourself to become aroused when watching porn and yes that has affected your performance in person. But you have to remember, it isn't just physical attraction that comes into play here, it is also on a personal level. Your two personalities have to mesh well. Try something new like nibbling her ear, and breathing down her neck, while carressing her clit. Let the tip of your penis slowly rub against the wetness of her clit and you will undoubtedly become aroused. Make it your intimate fantasy.

JB9900 · Supporter Joined: 25 Feb 2008 Posts: 196

You are just anxious about performing, and the pressure that you are putting on yourself is making it worse. Relax. Agree with your gf that you will caress each others bodies without having sex (even if you get hard). This will take away the pressure to perform, and I'm sure that you will get hard. A nice sexual massage is always nice. Remember, this is about pleasuring each other without having penetrative sex. After several sessions of this progress to penetrative sex when you are both ready - remember not to rush this process. I hope this helps. John

Guest · Guest

hi its been multiple sessions and she even insisted to not stop until i became hard and i still could not get hard. i really think that it is a mental thing in the sense that touching, blowing my penis does not do anything for me because i have to have the mindset to really get going. its starting to upset her in the sense that she feels im not attracted to her or that shes doing something wrong and i really just want her to understand that its me. i was debating if i should try a form of pills to see if i notice any difference but i have completely stopped masterbating and wondering if i should just try to masterbate without thinking of anything just to get it used to be pleasured. if anyone can help. i do not believe that its that i need to relax because after many times with her being calm and house to ourselves, i still cant get hard.

really need help debating seeing a form of a doctor-

cant get hard for girlfriend

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