cocaine addiction

Guest · Guest

Just found out my boyfriend has used cocaine for many years. He says he wants to stop never had a reason until now (me). He says that he's got it under control, has agreed to periodic testing etc., but I'm concerned as to him handling it without professional help. Is it possible for someone to just make their mind up and deal with the withdrawls successfully? He's only 4 days into recovery; does it get eaiser with time? When can I expect the worst to be over?

Miia · Gold Member Joined: 21 Sep 2005 Posts: 390

I suppose it has to do with how long and how much he has been using it. It is known that cocaine addicts get cravings just by thinking of this powerful feeling they have from cocaine. I was reading stories about those who said they can do it on their own but soon after just go back to what they have been doing. Even those people with families and children, I suppose it is just something you don’t have the control over. Cocaine addicts would just disappear from their homes for days and then come back home. I have no experience with it, I am only telling you stories that I have heard or read.

Here are some of the words people used to describe their love ones who are cocaine addicts: “He lies, he disappears from home for days, and he swears that he can't remember most of what happens while he's away. He returns remorseful making promises that he has no intentions of keeping”

I don’t know if you have experienced anything like that with him. I suppose not all act like this. How long have you been together? Do you live together? Can you tell a bit more about how he behaves, and what are his habits, does he go out a lot and stuff like that.

Maybe you should talk him into doing counseling together, you going as support, if you notice that cold turkey is not working for your boyfriend.
Feel free to write any time you need to talk!

skachelek · Newbie Joined: 08 Nov 2005 Posts: 6

Miia,

Sorry I haven't answered, I lost where this post went...I have a hard time getting him to totally open up and give me details. Seems to work better to get a little info when the topic comes up naturally. Anyhow, best I can tell he's been doing cocaine for many years (we have a mutual friend who has known him for 20 years and thinks he's been using all along). It was actually the mutual friend that told me he suspected cocaine simply because my b/f never had any money. But both the friend and I could not see any symptoms, no eye diliation, no nervousness, actually has a small beer belly, not fitting the ususal cocaine user's pysique. He never disappeared, doesn't really go out and party, has a decent job he's had for years, is very reliable on the job etc. He's 39, never been married, I'm 49, divorced with 2 kids. Had ex-boyfriend that was a heavy pot smoker. He keep saying he would give it up...7 years later I gave him up. When my friend told me he suspected coccaine use with my new boyfriend, my first reaction was to bail, I just didn't want to waste anymore time in my life, and didn't want to expose my children etc. But the man is truly otherwise wonderful. I seceretly sent in beard trimings for a hair folicle test and got my answer before I confronted him. I needed to know for sure so that he couldn't lie to me. Anyhow, we are just about living together so I do get to watch him alot. He seems to be doing pretty good. When I ask him if he's having any trouble, he just says that anytime he thinks about it, he just thinks about losing what we have found in each other and that takes care of it. The only things I've noticed is that he's really, really hungry and he said that his stomach has bothered him a little lately. It's been 11 days not that he's been clean YAY!, he says the worst is over but I'm not sure.

Miia · Gold Member Joined: 21 Sep 2005 Posts: 390

I know this is not the same but it was similar to me when I was quitting smokes. I would get these pictures of me smoking with the perfect cup of coffee and would get an incredible wish just to light one more cigarette. My boyfriend is a non-smoker and my father suffers from asthma, so both of them minded the smoke (actually bf minded the smoke cravings not the smoke itself). The problem was that I also minded the smoke and everything that went along with smoking. When the urge came, I would just erase the picture of a perfect cup of coffee as soon as possible, think of my loved ones and me, being obsessed with not forgetting ciggies, having them all the time around, the awful smell on my cloths, from my mouth and this made me completely free in some time. I reckon that your boyfriend is doing the same thing. Falling in love is a powerful thing, can make you do things you didn’t even know you could.
I still sometimes get the pictures of perfect coffee and a cigarettes but I don’t think about lighting it ever again.
I wish you good luck!

Guest · Guest

my girlfriend is bulimic and is a cocaine addict but will not for the life of her give it up or tell me the truth about it, i have been so stupid. we recently got engaged and now i have found this out i am questioning my self weather i can trust her. she does not know i have found out so much........

cocaine addiction

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