problems with keeping an erection before sex

ok i'm 18 years old and a virgin. My girlfriend and I are both ready to have sex and recently we tried. for watever reason i couldnt stay hard long enough to actually have sex. this happened twice already and it is very stressful and depressing. its not that it stays soft. it gets hard, but not hard enough to put it in...wow that sounded weird...but watever if someone could help that would be cool

this exact same thing is happening to me right now. if someone could please shed some light on my situation that would be great

I would imagine that it is probably because of the stress and worry. Perhaps instead of planning and saying "let's do it tonight", just kiss and cuddle etc and do it spontaneously one night when you feel comfortable. Also, maybe oral is a good way to get over any embrassment you may feel with eachother

I think you should free your mind before sex. i used to hav this problem where i cant keep an effective erection when i was about to penetrate. however, i overcome this problem when me and my gf went for a vacation and somehow i didnt think a lot about "the need to keep a good erection" and it just worked!

Another method you could try is maybe you can have some herbal supplement before sex and it does help, both physically and mentally. You can find more information about this in my website. cheers and good luck. wish you all the best

Honestly the same exact thing happens to me...and i can relate when you say its stressful and depressing. I've read up on it a bit and i think its really because of anxiety and just being nervous before hand and not completely comfortable...and possibly pressured

cheer up guys, it's just performance anxiety. maybe have a couple of drinks before you start (not too many or you may end up with the fabled "whiskey dick"). that should relax you and hopefully override your nerves. it happens to a lot of people. in fact i'd say perhaps even most men on their first time have trouble getting a good solid erection, i did myself.

Be patient while having sex, just relax calm down and not to worry

Guest wrote:

ok i'm 18 years old and a virgin. My girlfriend and I are both ready to have sex and recently we tried. for watever reason i couldnt stay hard long enough to actually have sex. this happened twice already and it is very stressful and depressing. its not that it stays soft. it gets hard, but not hard enough to put it in...wow that sounded weird...but watever if someone could help that would be cool

same here man, im a virgin, i went to have sex yesterday and cudnt get it up one bit, i was rubbing her she was sucking me, everything it wudnt get up, i need help too

yeaup im 19 and ive tried twice already i dont get it man

Guest wrote:

ok i'm 18 years old and a virgin. My girlfriend and I are both ready to have sex and recently we tried. for watever reason i couldnt stay hard long enough to actually have sex. this happened twice already and it is very stressful and depressing. its not that it stays soft. it gets hard, but not hard enough to put it in...wow that sounded weird...but watever if someone could help that would be cool

I'm not a doctor but this seems like a case of sexual performance anxiety. Anxiety is a major cause of erectile failure but it is easily treatable. I suggest you try to relax (easier said than done, I know), don't think about it too much and things will improve with time. If the situation persists for more than three months, go see a urologist: even if this is purely psychological, a urologist can help you and prescribe you an effective treatment.

And another thing: anxiety is closely related to depression and depression is also a major cause of erectile failure. Erections start in the brain and if the brain isn't working properly, sexual problems may occur.

Finally, I suggest you do some research on the subject of sex and sexual performance anxiety. Read books, talk to experts, search the Internet. Knowledge is indeed power: the more you know about these problems, the less stressful they will be. Good luck!