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Best quote in a long time.

Just saw it today in my Franklin Planner. "Some people lose sight of the fact that of two evils, it isn't necessary to choose either." - Anonymous spell checked just for you, PH

by User avatar j1miller

What is the biggest problem regarding King Kong?

For me, the worst thing about having King Kong walk down your street is that kids could look up and see the giant genitalia. --Jack Handey -----------------

by User avatar shelflifers

2 jokes for a Saturday

If you are easily offended please walk away now!!!! A man, while playing on the front nine of a complicated golf course, became confused as to where he was on the course. Looking around, he saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked up to her, explained his confusion and asked her if she...

by User avatar Floridaboiler

inside the head of the female long distance runner

I was chatting with my girlfriend about tonight's long run, and she wondered if all runners thought this way. I said probably not, but someone must .... Left and right brain fought away. At the House L: w00ty w00t! Going long again! Sooo excited! - R: Dude, we were just out for 15 on...

by User avatar elkid

DVD Review: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Season Five

The fifth season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer introduced the character of Dawn (Michelle Trachtenberg). Dawn is the sister of Buffy (Sarah Michelle Gellar). Now, if you have been watching for the first four seasons, you know that Buffy doesn t have a sister. She is an only child. But, if you...

by User avatar Pug

Top Ten Old West Phrases That Will Never Sound The Same After "Brokeback Mountain"

Top Ten Old West Phrases That Will Never Sound The Same After "Brokeback Mountain" 1. "I'm gonna pump you fulla lead!" 2. "Give me a stiff one, barkeep!" 3. "Don't fret---I've been in tight spots before." 4. "Howdy, pardner." 5. You stay here while I sneak around from behind." 6....

by User avatar andydp

Deep Demotivator for a Moonday...

"I wish I would have a real tragic love affair and get so bummed out that I'd just quit my job and become a bum for a few years, because I was thinking about doing that anyway." --Jack Handey And for all of us Non-runners:

by User avatar shelflifers

Calm and respectable lady joke!

A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." The pharmacist's...

by User avatar Guest

Leave it to those Romanians...

More randiness... Priest in trouble over sex tape A Romanian priest is in trouble after his plan to discredit a local councillor by filming him having sex in church backfired. Father Petrica Florea, 47, from Costesti, convinced a local 17-year-old girl to seduce Constantin Moise, 74, on...

by User avatar andydp

All this extra work is killing me...Despair and Jack Handy

Fear can sometimes be a useful emotion. For instance, let's say you're an astronaught on the moon and you fear that your partner has been turned into Dracula. The next time he goes out for the moon pieces, wham!, you just slam the door behind him and blast off. He might call you on the radio and...

by User avatar purple hayes