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Some people like insertions as you say, but I think most women get little pleasure out of vaginal insertion. What you mention using only makes me cringe. I can see doing some real damage using a pen and a candle doesn't sound like it would be comfortable either because it's not going to slip and slide easily. Where do you get the idea that other galz luv it? If it's from porn, you have to remember porn is mainly designed to turn on guys. It's not indicative of what girls like.
If you really want to try insertion, try putting a condom on something with the proper shape and using that. But I think you will do better by discovering what you like best by massaging your outside parts.
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