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Hi.

I am new to this website, but I wished I had found it much earlier!  I have been using Klonopin since 1992, except for during my two pregnancies.  I was prescribed it after having such severe anxiety attacks, that I wound up in the emergency room with paralziying symptoms.  I had developed PTSD because of childhood trauma, and had been using alcohol to cope with it since adolescence.  Alcohol and daily function didn't mix too well, so after a five-year period of abstinence, I began my love affair with Klonopin.  It was a wondrous drug!  Once I used it, I felt as if the answer to my problems had been found.  I didn't know I should have run like the devil to get away! 

At first, I had a new life with new meaning!  I was able to socialize and be the person I knew I was deep down inside and I was so relieved.  Eventually, I started needing more and more of the drug to give me the results I wanted and began to run out of it early.  After increasing my dosage and still running out, I started to get in trouble with my psychiatrists and jumped from one to the other.  I started drinking off and on again while taking the benzos, and for some odd reason, klonopin began to sedate me more and more. I started a roller coaster ride of "legal speed-balling"; that is, using klonopin and stimulants at once to get the "perfect balance" of being calm and in control, but also, not feeling like a useless zombie.  From 2007 to the present, I had stopped abusing Klonopin and replaced it with increasing dosages of Adderall.  Fatigue became my biggest complaint, and I took using Adderall to a new level.  I snorted it like cocaine, and it took me down quickly, but I still needed Klonopin to come down.  The anxiety was phenomenal after a long amphetamine binge, but Klonopin was my best friend all along.  After quitting Adderall and relapsing on and off since 2008, I had been using Klonopin very responsibly, taking only .5 to 1.5 mgs a day.  I had for some reason, been averse to the feeling of too much Klonopin and was at peace with the dose I was now taking, but after fifteen months of being clean from uppers, I sought Adderall and Ritalin out one more time and ended up giving half of my K-pins to a friend.  That is a long story, so I will not get into it, but the point is, I ended up risking my Klonopin security and ran out of them early because of giving many of them away.  I came clean from Adderall, and I told my shrink what I had been doing.  The truth will set you free!.  So they say! 

I have been cut off of Klonopin and my husband knows what is going on.  After alot of whining and complaining, he finally convinced me to try and get off of them instead of seeking them out elsewhere. 

It is now day #9 and I know that the hell has only just begun.  I take Neurontin as a substitute, and I think it helps a little.  I developed severe headaches, so I also had a small Tramadol script for migraines, and taking those for a few days has been a godsend.  However, the real hell id just beginning, because I didn't realize how much Tramadol has been taking the edge off.  I am now feeling horrible without Klonopin, and all of the symptoms that were being masked are now out in the open.  I don't want to go anywhere or do anything, and when I do things, it is a huge struggle.  I don't feel as if I can make it, but I feel as if I owe it to my family to try.  I didn't realize how much Klonopin afffected me, even at low doses.  I have been told I look better, am more alert, and just more upbeat, though I don't feel it inside.

 I really want to get off of this stuff, as I suffer from depression as well, and Klonopin had begun lowering my mood and decreasing my energy level tremendously.  Klonopin gives and gives, but then it takes away much more than you are aware of.   I don't want to be this way any longer, so  I am torn between feeling at ease but a blank slate,  or feeling full of anxiety and fear but alive for the first time in twenty years!

I would love to hear from others who are going through this or who have kicked this awful drug!

Thanks!

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I commend you for accepting your resposibility and acknowledging that you were abusing these meds and alcohol. I have been on Klonopin for over 30 years. I have cut back to a .5 mg 2 times a day after many years of many other meds and a much higher dose of Klonopin. With the issues from your past, chilhood, etc. you may want to do as I have and get into therapy. I have no insurance and have been fighting Social Security for over 3 years but there are community centers that have group and indiviual counseling that are based on your income, I go to both as there are some things I cannot discuss in group. They have helped a lot as well as a pain management Dr. that I went to that has helped me to get off the merry go round of drugs, I started with them 10 years ago at 32 pills a day, am down to 9 but some are for my heart and blood pressure which was not included in the original 32. You can make it with the love and support of your family, but please consider counseling as they are more adept at understanding the problems with abuse, withdrawal, dependency, PTSD, anxiety, depression and the full gamut that goes along with solving the issues that helped to make us who we are today. I wish you the best and know you can make it but it does take time. : )
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yeah, this sux, but u CAN DO IT keep on NOT TAKING THIS STUFF
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First of all I am a survivor of klonopin use -about 17 years of use about 2mg a day and as most of you i was prescribed it by my family doctor.  First of all and more importantly than anything....YOU CANNOT DO THIS ALONE........DON'T EVEN TRY.  I REPEAT YOU CANNOT DO THIS ALONE.  You must get help!!!!!!!!!  I ended up in a the er trying to coming off of this stuff and was subsequently send to a medical detox facility to come off of this drug.  That was a joke.  They kept me there 2 weeks put me on phenobarbitol and all other kinds of sh*t that might help for short term users but not me....... and I was back in the psychiatric unit of my local hospital.  I was having all the severe anxiety and obsessive compulsions heart attack etc. symptoms. It takes a good three months to come off of the drug with a substitution of valium.  THAT IS THE ONLY WAY YOU CAN DO IT....WITH A SUBSTITUTION OF VALIUM.   Once you are off the klonopin the valium is a sinch to get off of.  Nothing at all like the klonopin.  I got off the valium on my own.  I was fortunate enough to have been in the hospital or I would have either killed myself of someone else because I was drinking heavily to come off of it.  This will land you in more problems that you already have so do no drink alcohol.  You can get off of this drug but you have to find a doctor who can treat you with a substitution through valium.  There is a manual that shows you how much and what quantity to take.  I don't remember the name but it is will publicized.  I hope this helps.  There is hope just remember that but get to a good psychiatrist who deals with the addiction to this drug as soon as possible.  Reach out to all or any family member for help.  Do not be embarassed tell them everything you can tell them to look it up and then get to a good doctor.  I was embarassed and looking back I wish I wouldn't have been so.   
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i am on day six and find the news that this is not as bad as it gets. I was taking .5, two times A DAY, THEN MY DOCTOR INCREASED THE DOSE TO 3 MGS a day when I became hung in the fight or flight of PTSD. My blood pressure shot up and would not come down, my MD increased pb meds, without much success. I overdosed and was hoapitalized. I am in cold turkey withdrawal AND i AM FEELING LIKE I HAVE THE FLU AND HEART PALPITATIONS. i GUESS i BETTER BRACE MYSELF FOR THE WORST OF IT.
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Hello, newbie. Was SO glad to read your post about the Klonopin and its evil withdrawal. That's how I feel about it, too. I can't believe two docs kept me on it without telling me how addicting it is and how hard it is to get off of. Up until 3 weeks ago, I'd been on it (1 - 1.5 mg) for a year. When I started to decrease my dose, first to .5, then to 1/4, I started feeling the way you described...couldn't think, felt I was in a black hole of such fear and dread I could barely even care for myself, let alone my husband. Tomorrow I'm going back to my current doc and asking for a sub of Valium to help me wean off this bad drug. Thanks for all your help in sharing your story. It meant so much to me. Blessings on you and your family!
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Hi klonogirl,

I have been in a similar scenario and I have successfully kicked Klonopin. I can tell you it was a very tough transition, but I am not sorry for it! I have panic disorder and PTSD, and at the time I was prescribed Klonopin, I was seeing a psychiatrist who just seemed to overprescribe...everything. I followed her instructions to the letter and was on a high dose of Klonopin for about a year before I realized I had slowly been turning into a complete zombie. When I confronted her about a tapering option, she asked me if I would rather not have panic attacks or deal with panic attacks amplified. I was pissed and told her I was ceasing all treatment with her, including cold-turkey-quitting my Klonopin. (In hindsight, I would NEVER recommend that approach to ANYONE. Klonopin has a HORRIBLE withdrawal pattern and the symptoms and side-effects are ten times worse on a cold turkey quit, especially from a high dose. I probably should have been hospitalized during this- it's a miracle I was not.) I was in my last semester of college when I began my cold turkey quit, so for the first two weeks, my busy schedule kept my mind off anxiety flareups and some of the pain that would come and go. Three weeks in, however, I started feeling exactly as you describe- I couldn't get out of bed, I felt like I couldn't do anything, and my body hurt so badly I felt like I was being electrocuted on the hour. I had muscle spasms I could not control and migraines that were often so severe I had to e-mail my professors and privately explain my situation in order to be excused from class. After 2 months, I decided to see another doctor to prevent myself from rebounding back to the medication. He prescribed a different benzo for me, and while it wasn't an ideal situation, that small dose brought great relief for my final climb down from Klonopin. I take Xanax and Zoloft today and so far have had a reasonable experience tapering off those medications- they were prescribed to treat the missed PTSD diagnosis.

It can be done- I am proof! When you don't have the willpower, you have to learn to be gentle with yourself physically. It was difficult for me as a type A person to let go and let my body re-regulate itself, but do everything in your power to make the healthiest choices you can for yourself while you detox. Give yourself permission to sleep on the really bad days. On the average days, push yourself to complete at least one or two major tasks. On the good days, do as much as you can, and write it down so you can give yourself some much needed patting on the back. The physical part of detox is the absolute hardest, so surround yourself with friends and family who will understand and act as constant reminders that you are getting BETTER each day.

I'm so relieved to be off Klonopin and looking forward to the day I will finally be completely off Xanax. I promise it gets better- one morning, you will wake up and find that there's a lot less fog in your head and that the pain is minimal- and you'll relish those days. Then those will get even better and become pain free days. It doesn't all get better, as those of us with mental disorders can certainly tell you, but you WILL feel an improvement. And there is no shame in seeking multiple doctors' advice on how to treat yourself during a detox. You do not have to "stick it out" as I chose to- there can be supplemental treatments that may ease the pain and help you detox faster.

Support, support, support...if I didn't have my friends, I'm not sure I would have survived without relapse. There is life after Klonopin, I promise! Best of luck!
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hi,my name is kristine,i was on klonopin for 16 years then the docter took me off to fast,i have been off 4 years,almost,but i guess i should say that i am really 2 years off,becouse i set my recovery back by taking benzos and lunesta during my wd,i am really suffering with lots of head sx and not being able to walk,i have to use a cane now. i drank alot on klonopin and smoked alot of pot on it. now i feel as though i got no life,will we get better? thanks kh58413
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Thanks so much for your response! I appreciate all the info and your kindness in sharing your experience with K-pin. Personally, I think it's an evil drug...at least it has an evil effect on you, especially if you quit cold turkey like we both did. Wow. That was an experience I'll NEVER forget. I'm on Xanax like you and instead of Zoloft, I'm on Prozac. Do you have a plan for when you will start tapering off Xanax. I'm planning on three weeks from now; that's when my doc will tell me what my first taper dose is. I CAN HARDLY WAIT. Since I've been on benzos, especially since the cold turkey off K and now on 1 mg Xanax, I've noticed disturbing forgetfulness, as well as the inability to do certain things I used to do automatically. I WANT MY BRAIN BACK! Not that I was all that swift before, but I was better than this!

Yes, support is all-important. My husband was really there for me during that cold turkey period of sheer hell, and I have some friends who got me out and tried to distract me and support me. Thank Heavens I wasn't alone, though when I was alone, it was the worst aloneness I've felt in my entire life. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. Keep me posted on your Xanax progress and thanks again for your support and input:)
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Hang in there klonogirlnolonger ,I too was taking that c**p ...I went to see the DR because I was feeling a lot of stress not so much Anxietey but really nervous,and that's what he gave me anyway...one year went by and I said NO I don't need this I says ok I'm gonna try not taking to see what happens well turns out the next day I was feeling like omg I need to take so that really scared me I did get hooked and so before it gets worse I started to decrease by taking half of the pill .5 mg anyway it's been 3 weeks I'm almost finished with my half a pill the withdrawals are kinda crazy dizziness off balance can't sleep at night ....but we gotta tell ourselves it's for the better I should of never listen to that DR I mean to think we go see a dr he's there to help us? Ya think again.....anyway hope u all feel better soon remember ur no alone....xoxoxox
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I have been on Klonopin and others for over 30 years for panic attacks.  4 months ago I quit cold turkey. I was on .5mgs 2X/day.  The withdrawel symptoms are horrific. I am wondering how long it has taken others to be symptom free. Every day I want to go back on the drug due to sever panic attacks, nausea, pins and needles and total brain fog.  The doctor said the drug should be out of my system by now.  Ya, maybe but the side effects of withdrawel are still aweful.  I have horrible nausea and am afraid to leave my house.  I am a type A personality and used to be very busy. Now I feel too sick to do anything I enjoyed before. Does this ever end?

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Hi, 1955Chevy,
it does end. You say you quit cold turkey 4 months ago??

If you are still experiencing withdrawals, you are probably having a "protracted withdrawal" because you stopped so suddenly.

While the drug may be out of your system, it takes a while for the brain to recover and for your body to recover. It takes longer when you quit cold turkey. Let me know how you're doing.
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Hey, 1955Chevy, how are you doing today?? Hope things are going better. I'll pray for you.
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I am 69 and have taken psych meds for 30 years. I did not realize my depression was being caused by klonopin. I was convinced I would die of anxiety and depression without taking antidepressants and anti-anxiolytics. Wrong--I still have problems with PTSD, but can handle my runaway bloodpressure with bloodpressure meds, meditation, and really cutting out the caffeine and sugar along with red food dye. For me, diet is everything, and exercise. I am amazed that I actually feel great without being medicated, and I had terrible problems with rage and anxiety that I don't have anymore. I still have many reasons to feel anxious, but I am handling them so much better, and I can actually do creative things again, like write and paint. I have a normal sex life back and my appetite is under control. I have a degree in mental health and have worked the field for years. I never would have believed my problems would be easier to handle when the klonopin was gone. The withdrawal lasted 8 weeks, and I was taking 3 mg. daily and had been taking it 14 years. I shook like I was withdrawing from heroin, or alcohol. It was more than hard, and because of a suicide attempt with klonopin, the doctor took me off it cold turkey.
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It has been 5 months now and still feeling nausea, am dizzy, weak and but have less anxiety issues. I am a lot better! I got a drug for the nausea because I was sick all the time. Also, I wake up with terrible leg cramps or numb legs and have burning feet. Is this "just another symptom"?
I can't believe this drug is so popular.
I finally told my children what I have been going through. People told me I looked terrible so I just stayed away from everyone and everything I enjoyed. I am going on a trip with my wife and am worried that I can't do it. I was physically fit but now I feel too weak to work out. My wife is tired of my complaining. She has never taken a drug except maybe and aspirin a few times.
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