Feeling depressed after stopping the birth control pills?

Hi Girls!

I think I'm not able going through this :( I'm 2 month off the pill and I feel like different person. If I don't cry or feel depressed/anxious I just don't care about anything (school, my family, boyfriend). I'm mean and bad at everyone. It ruins my relationships and breaks my heart. I almost feel like "teenager"- sometimes I want to give up everything, go to a party and "be free"- but this is not me, I loved my long-term relationship, I didn't like drinking etc., I studied quite hard (and enjoyed it). Now I don't care- today deadline of one work is and I just don't want to do that.. Does someone notice this "change in personality"? I'm so scared.. I hope it is temporaly (hormonal mess), but what if(again this phrase!!) the pills just made me different? I started to take it 4 monts after me and my boyfriend started dating. I don't want to be like this, I really consider taking pill again- at least it can help from mess YAZ did to me :( My boyfriend is soo suportive, so nice and only thing I can sometimes think about is that he is too nice and good.. I act like crazy. I really don't want to end up with some bad guy at party, it's not me :( Did you have this feelings too?

Thank so much for your posts, it really helps! (Especially Jennifer :) )

Anysha: DO NOT GIVE UP! And do not to back on the pill. It's a long, hard road. No one knows that better than I do. It's been 9 months and I still struggle. But I'm improving and much better than I was. You're going to have to quit the pill eventually. You've already made it two months. Keep at it!

Sometimes, for me, the best reminder is these forums. I've spoken to and read posts from girls all over the world that have experienced this exact thing. We're from all different walks of life and in all different situations. The only thing we have in common is that we've all quit birth control. The shared side effects are not a coincidence. And I promise you, I've had every single thought that you just mentioned above. I constantly think my boyfriend is too nice. On my worst days, his sweetness, attentiveness, and loving nature actually spikes my anxiety. It's like I become a masochist that craves dangerous, "exciting" and volatile relationships. The real me doesn't want that. The real me loves how wonderful my boyfriend is. Our hormones are out of whack and they're causing anxiety and OCD (specifically ROCD) thoughts. The thoughts just aren't true. And that's why they torment us so much. If these thoughts were true, they wouldn't upset us this much. They wouldn't have led us to Internet searches. Our gut knows that something is off with us or we wouldn't be here on these forums because we would have never searched for them in the first place.

It's a really tough road to recovery. It's very much like a game of chutes and ladders. I have moments of normalcy and I have setbacks, particularly around ovulation and menstruation. Here are things that have helped me:

-Acupuncture
-Vitmains (b, d)
-Calcium, magnesium, zinc
-Omega 3's
-Research on ROCD, hormonal imbalances, low serotonin and dopamine symptoms, and postpartum depression
-Aphrodite's Women Health forum
-Relaxation tapes
-Books: The Happiness Trap, Brain Lock, The Anxiety and Social Phobia Workbook
-Mood journals
-Tracking ovulation/my cycle
-Talking to my boyfriend
-Time

Please keep fighting. Trust me, I've had every thought and fear that you've had. So have plenty others. You're not alone!

Hi girls,

Please I really need advice. I'm at my wits end. Feel like I can't cope it's my anniversary and I'm in an amazing hotel with my boyfriend and I know this is private but we just had sex and through the while thing my head was telling me you don't love him you don't like this then after it I burst out crying. I have felt this bad in a long time I'm off yasmine 9 months now and I really and truly though IM BETTER but I feel like I'm falling back into my depressed stage again

Would this have anything to do with me being due my period girls any advice wud help I'm literally fed up at this stage I'm so sad lately.

Please write back girls xxx

JammyDodgers--First off, I'm so sorry that you feel that way. I was going through all of that during my honeymoon, and I too cried after having sex. So, don't feel bad, I don't think it's abnormal. Honestly, having healed from all of this myself, I'd say your best bet is to see a counselor if you haven't already. I avoided going to one until I was healed, but then, even after I was physically healed, I still had to heal emotionally. I just wasn't able to know how to heal emotionally without professional help. I just had my last session last night, after only four, and I feel SO much better. All I really needed was validation and to hear from my counselor that I wasn't crazy and that I was normal. He even went on to say that his wife couldn't take the pills either because of the emotional side effects. You're not alone. Cry, let it out, talk to your boyfriend about it and have a good long sleep. You'll likely feel some relief if you just sit in your feelings for a while. Try not to analyze them, just let yourself feel sad and know that you will get through this, and how you feel now is temporary. We're here for you!

JammyDodgers--I should also add that, yes, it could be because of your period. It could also be a combination of issues. For example, your hormones are surging because of your cycle, you're still dealing with the painful memories of the pill, and you're still adjusting to your improvement every month and learning how to erase negative mental habits. I was doing wonderfully for a whole month, so much so that I rarely thought of these message boards and even stopped thinking so much about the painful memories. Then, I had a bad week, which seemed to linger, and I realized that, whatever was going on, I could no longer deal with on my own. I just needed to know for myself what had caused all my pain while going off the pill.

 

In the end, and after a few weeks of counseling, I've decided that it was a combination of issues. The two largest issues being that I went on the pill and went off in quick succession, and also that I was going through a huge life change of marriage. Both of those messed with my head in ways that I couldn't understand. Suddenly, I analyzed my feelings of sadness more than I ever had, and became obsessed with knowing why I was sad. I had a lingering doubt that, somewhere deep down, I'd settled for my husband and didn't love him as much as I should have. I was wrong. I still don't completely understand why I have sadness sometimes (even for several days), but what I do understand is that I DO love my husband and that he's right for me. I didn't settle. I suppose the answers to why I feel sad will come with time and a little more work, but please know that you do love your boyfriend. I'm sure of it, just as I'm sure that all the women on this forum love their significant others deeply. Relationships and feelings can get messy, but love is stronger than it all.

Hi Jen ,

I wanted to say thank you for your amazing advice. I do go see a counsellor but I haven't seen her in a long time but I'm goin to see her tomorrow. Good news though I got my period today I'm in bits but just happy I got them.

It's so weird all these thoughts that are goin round in my head about my boyfriend saying you do not love him you're more like friends but when I'm around I can't help but hug him kiss him love the smell of him so obviously I truly do love him.

I'm gonna have a relaxing day today.....I'm so tired and need to relaxing time for me.

Thanks for your advice

Love jen

So what did you find to help you. I am 41 and was also on the pill for 22 yrs. My doctor advised I go off, so I did. Now I am suffering, it is really scary. I started BHRT 6 months ago because within one month of stopping the pill I had every symptom of menopause. AND I mean every symptom. Now I feel a tiny better but struggle with sleep I am also a walking zombie with 4-5 hrs. if I am lucky. What did you find that helped you? I also do actupuncture every week and watch my diet, exercise sometimes...when I am not so tired from lack of sleep.
I am really interested in knowing what people are doing for sleep...I am even drinking tart cherry juice! Glad I am not alone!

I don't know if this will help, but what's helped me with sleep in the past is setting a strict routine before bed. For example, I would force myself to get ready for bed at least 2 hours before I knew I needed to fall asleep. Once in bed, everything I did was a "cool down" for me, a way to force my brain to slow down (often I was kept awake thinking of my to-do list). I also try sleepytime tea, and I don't know how much it helps, but it always has a soothing effect to drink something warm while lying in bed watching T.V. (though I realize T.V. is often what some would advise not to watch before bed). What I found was that, if I kept up with the routine faithfully every day, I often fell asleep when I needed to without much effort and felt rested the next day. However, when I go off the routine (like now), it's nearly impossible for me to wind down enough to even feel sleepy.

Hey guys I just discovered this website through this topic. As you can guess I just came of the pill Gedarel (also known as Marvelon) end of December after being on it for about a month and 1 week. Even though I took it for a short period of time I felt like it was driving me nuts. I lost my libido and worst of all....I started to feel like I didn't love my boyfriend anymore.

Im actually crying while typing this up because I'm so unhappy. I love my boyfriend, I love him so much. He's done so much for me and I've never met anyone who made me feel as amazing as he does. But lately (especially in the last few days) I suddenly stopped feeling the same way I used to when I would see him, kiss him, have sex with him, and look at him. It feels like the 'magic' around him disappeared. This doesn't feel normal. I know it's the pill now. I just know it because I feel so unhappy even to think that I would break up with him. Girls, I'm going crazy. Please talk some sense into me because none of this makes sense. Im so depressed. It was only in October 2012 when i thought to myself, 'i want to marry him, I want him to be the father of my children'. I just don't know. Please I'm desperate for someone to reassure me.

Thankyou :)

I'm sorry to hear that this has happened to you, like it has happened to so many of us. It's truly a terrible thing to go through. While I'm doing better each month, these months post-birth control have been the hardest of my life. It's tough and awful but you can improve and get better. There are a few things that can help speed up the process:

-vitamins: b, d, omega 3s
-acupuncture
-detox tea (i recommend Yogi)
-hormone testing
-tracking your good and bad days: you'll start to realize that your worst days are generally around ovulation and/or menstruation
-counseling
-forums (here but especially Aphrodite women's health forum - the topic "the side effects of stopping birth control" under the contraception section) because it's nice to know that you're not alone in this
-being open and honest with your boyfriend
-time. that's the best healer. your body has the synthetic stuff still in it's system and your hormones are also imbalanced. research hormone imbalances. we all have the symptoms of estrogen dominance and low progesterone which causes low serotonin and dopamine. research the side effects of all of those things to gain a better insight on what's happening to you. and stay strong. we're here for you. i post more on the Aphrodite women's health forum. you can read tons of posts there (both archived and current) of women who have experienced the exact same things. it's not a coincidence that we're all going through this after quitting birth control. remember that you're not alone. sometimes that's the best medicine.

Thankyou so much for this information. I checked out the other forum. You mentioned the yogi tea, I searched it on Amazon and found several different kinds of the detox tea. Is there a specific flavour i should be aware of or is it generally the whole detox range?g

I can confirm that Lady-Comp is a great option as I use it myself :-) I know also that now is available for UK & Irish market -

***Post is edited by moderator *** Web addresses not allowed***Please read our Terms of Use

 - it is not only very reliable and safe - but also easy to use and without any side-effects and invasion into your body......please also take a look at my previous posts, where I explain why hormonal pills and IUDs ast as abortifacients....

Hi
I took a pill with another name which is in fact Marvelon too. I just took it for 21 days, a month after my wedding( in some ways similar to JenniferE story which helped me a lot). After 21 days of suffering from being on the pill, I've been sick for 3 month after stopping it. By starting taking the pills my libido went away, I started nagging and had strong mood swings and little nausea and my relationship with my husband got worse everyday. he even confess he had moment of regretting getting married while just some days earlier we were so much in love. After stopping it I truly suffered from severe nausea, stomach problems, very dry skin,extreeeeme panic attacks and anxiety, depression and crying all day,trembling, loss of appetite, brain fog, difficulties in remembering stuff, no energy at all and heart palpation. I was thin before and no I lost 5 kgs. I couldnt move at all, I couldn't go anywhere I lost my Job:)
I thought I never get better.I was scared of everything even scared my home.Stupid and irresponsible doctors of my country laughed at me when I mentioned role of bc pill, even my OBG told me I'm pregnant after having longest period of my life, but I was sure because I was a healthy person before. so I started to search. you know Marvelon is banned in many countries? why is that? I tell you. I contact some doctors in Austria, and they told me that many people got hospitalizes for psychological problems of this pill. they told me that I was lucky to have my period and it take at least 3 month to get better and they were right. They told me that it mess with your minerals and vitamins too.
Sorry for my long story, I just wanted you to know that first 2 month was nightmare, I even thought of suicide, after 3rd period my nausea get better but not completely and so the other symptoms,. Our love in relation is back stronger than ever, so my libido! still I have anxiety problems and heart palpation but I'm sure it will get better.
Be strong and talk to your boyfriend and explain to him. show him our posts. I think a shrink may help too.
Wish me luck at rest of my journey of getting better!!!

Thank u , if had not been for ur posts I might not be able to get through this :) how long did it take?