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AllenN wrote:
If you've been told you need surgery, which means you've been through the non-surgical options and your condition is advanced enough, then bite the bullet and get it done. It's one week of PITA but after that it's awesome! Plan on a one month recovery but you'll have your whole life to look forward to thereafter. I did mine a year ago and while it was tough for a couple of weeks I now recommend it to anyone who's daily life is affected by this affliction. You'll look back and feel happy about your decision.
Hello, I read one of your previous posts about your experience and also noted that you ate a doctor, so would really appreciate a bit of advice if you don't mind? I had a large prolapsing hem removed on 24th September. I have an external V shaped wound with no stitches. Not sure if this is meant to close together and if so, how? I just don't get it as everytime you have a bm surely it just pulls it open again? Or will the edges will heal independently leaving me with a permanent V. It's all so confusing and scarey. Bms feel like passing glass. Did you find that bms got worse before they got better? Mine weren't too bad days 2 & 3, but day 4 was like acid and today (day 5) is like glass. Does it peak then start to ease? 2 weeks seems like such a long way in the distance...
Sorry - that should have said 'are a doctor' not 'ate a doctor'! Can't edit my original post on my phone.
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Glad to hear that your v shaped incision healed well. I'm sure I will be fine as I went to a very experienced and highly regarded colorectal surgeon, and other than at bm time and for a while after, I'm not really in any pain. 1 week post op today and the bleeding with bms has stopped too - that stopped yesterday, so I do believe things are healing internally. I guess that external wounds that you can see are always more scary as there's the visual element. But, you're right, people heal, and I will too - even if I don't understand how :) Thanks
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I am thinking, currently, I have got off lightly, reading these posts about post operation experiences. I had a haemorroidectomy last Wednesday, tomorrow will be a week since surgery. Once the anastetic wore off I of course felt the intense pain and the horror of BM anticipation. I managed with great difficulty and hours of laying in the bath and standing up, laying down, standing up for HOURS, finally managed a BM with the help of stool softening laxative, true grit and a loving partner. Several types of pain killers, laxative, nappy rash and small meals later I am seeing light at the end of the tunnel after 6 days. I dread the next BM, the burning intense pain around the scrotom area is like someone had put an electrified cattle prod in between my legs for about 20 mins after a BM. The rattling, shivering shock of this pain thankfully passes after 20mins and a bath. Please, PLEASE let me be on the road to recovery, I hope I have experienced the worst and I dont want any more surprises.
If I have to go to the toilet then so be it, nothing I can do about that but I hope it gets better and not worse.
After just under a week I can sit here and type on my computer, dosed up with painkillers admittedly and only really suffering from a sticky rear end, nappy rash, painful flinching at odd intervals and the horrendous pain at every BM.
There are times I wanted to just die there and then, other times I thought longlingly of the piles (haemorroids) I had in a previous life and they werent nearly so bad as this (yeah right!) Right now I feel quite normal apart from feeling a bit sore. Roll on the next BM - Bring it on - I will get through this!!!
Much sympathy and solidarity to all who are recovering from this hideous surgery.
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heard that u cant drink any citrus juice right after surgery 1sy 2 days is that right?
Supplements recommended b4 and after SURGERY:
Vita A (tomato,orang) : 10,000–15,000 IU per day, beginning a wk b4
Vita C: 1000–1500 mg per day, beginning at least a wk b4
Bromelain/ digestive enzyme(reduc pain, bruize & swelling): 500–1000 mg per day, wk b4
Arnica Montana 30c: 7 days b4 2 wks after 3 times/day keep under tongue if these pills are taken along with anticoagulants and pain relievers - there is an increased risk of bleeding
Zinc: 15-20 mg /day.
Take colace 2times/day as long as taking pain med
Diarrhea causes: overdose vit c, colace, mineral oil, prunes, pear juice, apricot, milk
Foods that stop diarrhea—banana, yogurt, rice, bread, apples, green tea, tomatoes, Gatorade(lost electrolyte), v8 juice-low sodium.
Constipation causes: pain killers, caffeine drks, swt foods.
To Avoid constipation: colace, Metamucil, banana, lots of water/juice, prunes, apricots, warm salty water
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I haven't heard of anything regarding citrus juices. I can't imagine this being true. My docs and nurses were very thorough and mentioned nothing regarding this. The supplements, etc. are probably not harmful but I think if you have a basically balanced diet (actually, the kind of diet you have to be on to have soft stool is itself both balanced and healthy!) then I don't think you'll need any additional supplements. This is a fairly straight forward surgery. The concepts are simple. Have bowl movements with soft stool. Take stool softeners if the meds are giving you constipation. Rest. Let your body heal itself. Almost everyone heals in time. It's a very predictable surgery. The recovery sucks but for me it has now been one year later. It's like it never happened! I'm good as new and enjoying life immensely, without having to deal with the concerns and daily affairs related to my hemmoroids! All those reading this who are either about to go through the surgery or are in recovery "HANG IN THERE!" You'll be delighted with the results and move about your life happily ever after! :)
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What you need to know about Internal Hemorrhoid Surgery (Hemorrhoidectomy)
OK, so you’ve had it enough of squirting blood each morning when you have a bowel movement. Or perhaps you’re concerned about the possibility of cancer if you don’t have those troublesome hemorrhoids removed.
Trouble is; your hemorrhoids are located up inside your rectum and that requires internal surgery…
First and foremost, you need reliable information: Many surgeons CAN perform a Hemorrhoidectomy; however, not all are equally proficient at it. YOU NEED TO ASK AROUND to find that ONE GUY who is considered to be THE BEST and MOST EXPERIENCED in this procedure. In short order, one doctor’s name will be mentioned far more often than all others… THIS IS PROBABLY THE GUY YOU WANT TO PERFORM YOUR PROCEDURE. You need the best, because a Hemorrhoidectomy is a somewhat complicated procedure, and if performed by a surgeon who does not SPECIALIZE in performing it, there is a far greater risk that you will be incontinent for life. ‘Nuf said.
Set the Date: Ok, so now you’ve found THE GUY. Now, it’s time to set the date. If possible, arrange to have your operation just before a holiday, such as the week before Thanksgiving. This way, you won’t be missed much at work, and can heal in peace. Besides, are you REALLY going to miss seeing your in-laws and eating dry turkey THAT MUCH?
Once the date is set, get ALL those household chores done BEFORE your operation! You know, the ones you’ve been putting off… cleaning the gutters, raking leaves, trips to the dump, replacing roofing shingles… whatever. Because the last thing you want to have is water leaking into your house while you are recovering… BECAUSE THERE WON’T BE A DAMN THING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT.
Talk with the family: It is imperative that you sit down with the kids and your spouse, and tell ’em the facts of life. The conversation should go like this: Daddy (or Mommy) is about to undergo a VERY painful surgery and will be in a GREAT DEAL OF PAIN. So, no fighting or yelling; NO MATTER WHAT (you’ll be doing enough for everyone... but more on pain later).
Location, Location, Location: For at least 7 days after your surgery, you will be LIVING IN JUST TWO ROOMS; the Bedroom and the Bathroom. Make sure that they are located AS CLOSE TO EACH OTHER AS POSSIBLE and definitely NOT on different levels of the house. If you must, kick your daughter out of her bedroom and have her sleep with the wife, because YOU NEED TO HAVE A TOILET WITH A TUB CLOSE BY, and they need to be mostly unoccupied. If you have only one bathroom in your home, make sure the kids know NOT to tie it up unnecessarily!
Items you need to purchase before surgery:
- Stool Softener
- Medicated Flushable Wipes (96 pack)
- Panty Liners (96 pack; even for you Jack.)
- Hemorrhoid Soothing Spray
- Tylenol or other pain killer (preferably coated) NOT ASPIRIN… it promotes bleeding!)
- Epsom Salts
- Prune Juice
- Assorted Fruit Juices
- Foods with High Fiber Content (Barley, Rice, Cereals, etc.)
- Gatorade (to maintain your electrolytes)
- Heating Pad
Preparations: Start by cleaning the bathroom you will be using. You want the tub to be really, really clean; to minimize the risk of infection. Then place plenty, and I mean PLENTY of reading materials near the tub. REALLY… you’re gonna spend A LOT OF TIME in that tub. Ever wanted to read War and Peace? Here’s your chance.
When can I get to go back to work? If your job is non-physical (ie: desk job) you can expect to return to work in two (2) to three (3) weeks. If you have a physically-demanding job (e.g: farmer, truck driver, heavy equipment operator, etc.) plan on being out of work for four (4) to five (5) weeks. Yes, really.
The day of your surgery: Doctors will typically not allow patients to fill their pain medication prescription until after they have received their surgery; but there is some good news… many hospitals are now offering an Internal Pharmacy Service… USE IT. This is definitely NOT the time to save a few bucks! The internet is resplendent with stories of people who waited until they got home to get their prescriptions, only to encounter insurance issues, closed pharmacies and the like. Don’t be stupid… get your pain meds filled ASAP!
Now… let’s talk about the Pain: Make no mistake: THIS IS AN INCREDIBLY PAINFUL PROCEDURE, because the rectum contains more nerve endings than any part of the human body (and who knew?). Am I trying to scare you away from getting your surgery? No… I am trying to make DAMN SURE you are prepared with the PROPER AMMO. The proper ammo is NOT Tylenol. It is your pain meds, which (unless your doctor has a death wish or you are allergic) will be Percocet, OxyContin or Vicodin. During the first 6 days after your surgery, there will be times when the pain is so gripping and crippling that you will wonder if you are going to make it, even with the strongest pain medication. Checking the Internet reveals many stories of men and woman who have contemplated suicide, after their “doctor” sent them on their way with instructions to take Tylenol for the pain. These “doctors” should be reported to the state and their licenses revoked. If you are unable to take these medications (and many people can’t for a variety of reasons) you and your doctor need to discuss alternative pain medications or work out a Pain Management Plan in advance of your surgery.
Pain Management: Better doctors and nurses will tell you the fundamental principle of Pain Management: STAY AHEAD OF THE PAIN. This means that BEFORE THE ONSET OF PAIN you must take your pain meds. If you delay, it can take several hours to get the pain under control. If you are cannot take the “heavy-hitters” (Percocet, OxyContin or Vicodin) again I say, work with your doctor to discuss alternative pain medications; or arrive at a Pain Management Plan in advance of your surgery. So why did you buy the Tylenol? That’s for the days 7 through 10 after surgery.
Why is it so COLD in this house? Shortly after your surgery, you may find that you are S-H-I-V-E-R-I-N-G, despite being wrapped in multiple blankets. No worries, this too will pass. It’s just your body’s reaction to the trauma of surgery. Turn the electric heating pad up.
Going to the Bathroom: Here is the biggest tip that the medical community never tells you… STAND TO sh*t. You heard me… STAND (or squat) OVER THE TOILET, AND LET ‘ER GO. If you sit down on the seat, you will likely INCREASE your pain, potentially to the point where you give up trying to go… AND NOT HAVING A BOWEL MOVEMENT IS REALLY, REALLY BAD.
Stool Softeners, Metamucil and Prune Juice: Your goal is BALANCE…. avoiding diarrhea (which is bad for you healing) while also avoiding constipation. Pain Meds, like Percocet and Vicodin CAUSE CONSTIPATION! Balance is also important because, if you stools are too soft, they will “burn” your butt so badly, it will feel like someone cut your rear end with a seriated steak knife; but if the stools are too hard, your stitches can tear. So find what works for you… BALANCE. Stool Softeners work slowly, Prune Juice works quickly. Metamucil is advised to provide a fiber source, to keep things moving.
The Tub - Your New Best Friend: Ahhhha… whiling away the minutes (and hours!) with your new best friend: The Tub. You SHALL BE ONE with the Tub. Here’s what to do. Before opening the lid of the toilet to attempt a bowel movement, close the drain on the tub and begin filling it with warm water. Then, when the extreme pain of your bowel movement bites you in the you know where, your friend the tub will be READY to provide relief. These baths are also known as “Sitz” baths; and should be done three (3) to (4) times a day. I suggest adding a sprinkle of ordinary Epson Salts to sooth the pain away.
What is that BURNING sensation immediately after I have my bowel movement? Simply put, it’s Diaper Rash… and now you know why babies cry like; well you know what. It can feel as though a sword has just been drawn across your anus, and it hurts enough to make a grown man cry. All you can do is to hold on for dear life, and remember that your friend the Tub is ready to help make things better. Now you know why we fill the tub BEFORE we begin our bowel movement! Since the CAUSE of the pain is the constant wetness (from draining anal mucus) around the exterior of your anus, the CURE is to keep it clean and dry (hence the panty liners and shot of “soothing hemorrhoid spray”; which contains a natural astringent, Witch Hazel).
But I can’t seem to Pee: Some people who have had this surgery to have difficulty peeing… and this is also REALLY, REALLY BAD. If you can’t pee, YOU WILL HAVE TO GO TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM where they will likely catheterize you (OUCH!). To avoid this, keep hydrated… drink lots of water and fruit juices, and if you can, PEE IN THE TUB (you can always wash it down later!) Or lay on a towel on the floor and pee into the towel.
What the HELL was THAT? Bam… your Rear End just CLOSED UP SHOP. I mean, that sucker slammed-shut. What is it? Just a “spasm” and they happen sporadically for the first 3-4 days after surgery. It’s normal, and will stop in just a few days. Until then, when it happens GO TO THE NICE PLACE (stay calm and think soothing thoughts) and it will subside more quickly.
What is that SMELL? You’re gonna smell… bad. Particularly your bed sheets, which can get downright rancid. Don’t fret, it’s just your body expelling those pain meds and doing the healing thing. Replace the sheets and get on with it.
Anal Leakage: Bet you didn’t know this, but you butt produces mucus, just like your nose. This mucus coats the inside of your anus to protect it, and allow the poop to move along smoothly. Well, your butt is going to OVERPRODUCE mucus to compensate for the trauma of surgery… and HERE’S WHERE THE TUB COMES IN. Three-to Four times a day, and after EACH and EVERY bowel movement, YOU MUST BE IN THE TUB for 30-60 minute. No exceptions.
Underwear and Panty Liners: ALWAYS WEAR UNDERWEAR; even when sleeping. And remember to place a panty liner inside your underwear. The panty liner “self-sticks” to the underwear (pull off the backing, dummy!). Don’t be surprised when you see small amount of blood, ass mucus or poop on the pad. It is all part of the healing process.
Bleeding vs. Spotting: While it IS NORMAL to see small amount of blood on the panty liner (this is “spotting”) it is NOT NORMAL to have blood flowing out your rear end. In the unlikely event this should happen CALL YOUR DOCTOR IMMEDIATELY.
Can I take Showers? Of course, and you SHOULD… after your tub time. Soap? Yes. Bubble Bath? No.
What can I eat? You NEED fiber. You can get it from cereals, barley and rice. Drink plenty of water or fruit juices. If you ever feel faint, it is very likely that you have lost some of the electrolytes in your body; and this is where Gatorade comes in: Drinking it will replenish lost electrolytes. AVOID ALL CARBONATED BEVERAGES. NO ALCOHOL. NO PEANUTS OR NUTS. NO POPCORN. NO PEPPERS!
When will I feel better? You WILL start to feel better after 8-10 days after your surgery. You should continue soaking in the tub regularly for at least four (4) weeks after surgery. It will get better; and some days, it may seem like you’ve lost a little ground; but after about two (2) weeks the worst is over.
Good Luck and God Bless - Dr. Love
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Thanks SO MUCH-I thought I was the only one! I am in day 9 of Hemorhhoidectomy surgery recovery. I have had excruciating pain with bowel activity, accomplishing any movement only with the assistance of the shower water-jet which can be hand-held. I would add that spraying the water "straight up" the rectum produces an enema, without the syringe. You must be mentally equipped for a nasty irrigation into the shower floor because there is no way you can make it to the toilet. In my case, sitting on the toilet is not an option right now. Too much pain & stress on the area. With some thorough rinsing, and bleach, the shower can be cleaned properly. And all that fecal matter is going down the same drain as the toilet anyway. Your description of your experience is very reassuring to me. I was thinking at day 9 I should be further along with recovery. I think posts like this are so beneficial to others who may have doubts about their recovery. I must say, that as the days go by I have more positive feelings, after being very doubtful and depressed at about day 7. Thanks so much for your honest & frank reporting. Hope you are doing better as the days go by!
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i have just finished day 7...
I left the hospital on the day or surgery on top of the world, felt amazing and , of course, there was no pain as i was still happily enjoying the anaesetic.
Since then, wow, just wow... the fist 2 days i couldnt get out of bed (but i had to), the pain was unbearable and and couldnt pee either... everything felt like it was overflowing and nothing could come out.
i returned to hospital on day 2 (which i woke at 2:30) due to the pain and was discharged to see my consultant on day 3 (which i woke at 3:30)at which point he prescribed stronger pain killers.
day 4 (i awoke at 4) and 5 were spent in bed, my children nursing me, i also had ice packs that were getting changed regularly and living on my opening.
day 5 morning (woke around 6:30 with bad stomach) i actually thought we were there, i woke in the morning and had a glass of water and felt the urge to go... i passed a stool quickly and with only light pain, i was also able to sit on the edge of the bath and 'bidet' myself with the shower without any pain at all...the rest of the day felt ok until later in the day when the pain returned and i spent the night in agony!
day 6 (after an hour or 2 of broken sleep) i woke and came downstairs, at this point i am physically exhausted, i am tired and still in pain, although i was able to spend the day in the garden (relaxing)and managed a number 2 early evening (excruciating)i took my concoction of medication an hour before bed and fell asleep around 1am.
I woke today at 7:30... havent been to the toilet yet and really dont want to!!!! (its 2030hrs now).
I have been drinking gallons of water, lactolose to 'loosten' me, pain killers, fruit, fruit n fibre etc etc.. yet the pain is horrible...and i feel sick, the pain is so bad i feel dizzy and sick!
I swore after i had my piles banded about 15 years ago that i would never ever have anything done again... i learnt to live with them and now i know why.
I know for a fact if they return in any way shape or form that i will not ever look at doing this again... Those that have had it and recovered, fine they can say it.. but ive been through 2 surgeries and in my opinion the excruciating pain and stabbing feeling and blood, etc is something i cannot even describe on a scale... it bloody well hurts!!!
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Well folks, I am at the four week point now and seem to be on my way to a decent recovery. I have decided to ask myself a few questions that might help you in your recovery or you quest to rid yourself of the 'roids that are plaguing you. I have a rather warped sense of humor, so just bear with me as I talk to myself here. :-P
Was it painful? Jesus, yes. Imagine someone shoving a tree limb in and out of your ass time and time again.
Did the pain ever cause me to scream? You betcha. Like a little girl at a horror film. The pain was mostly from the ass spasms. I never knew what an ass spasm was until I had that surgery. I sure as hell know what they are now. If I never have another one it will be too soon.
Were the first few poops painful? Well duh. Does the idea of sh**ting glass sound painful? I had an empty body wash bottle that I kept filled with water which I would squirt on my ass during every poop. It hurt to sit on the toilet, so I resorted to trying to hold myself up off of the toilet seat to keep the toilet seat from pushing to hard on my ass. I graduated to one hand on the toilet and one hand on the sink vanity. Finally, I was able to sit on the commode without thoughts of my pistol in my bedroom nightstand.
What about urinating? For about the first week, I took a poop and then had to stand up to pee. That was a bit aggravating. But, I got a good look at my pop and that was interesting. I never thought that looking at pop would be interesting until now. It is amazing what you find interesting when your ass is hurting.
Did fiber help? I suppose so. It seemed to me that my poop actually got harder with the use of fiber, so I stopped using as much.
When did you go back on your regular diet? Three days after surgery I ate a big ass hamburger. The next day it felt like I was sh**ting a brick. I persevered though and the monster was gone in a few minutes. From that point, I stuck with smaller burgers. I didn't want my body to get used to all the fiber fiber fiber c**p because that is not what I eat. I think I ate more fiber before the surgery than afterwards so the extra stuff was playing hell with my system. Regardless of the pain, I stuck with REAL food. I continued eating soup and vegetables simply because that is what I always eat anyway.
Can you control the ass spasms? Sort of, if you really pay attention to what you are doing. After you have had a few, you pretty much know what is going to bring on one. I would just concentrate and bear down just a bit and that stopped many of them cold. The ones you CAN'T stop are the ones that come from being surprised or startled. Imagine starting to drop something - BAM - ass spasm. You stand there and scream and holler to nobody in particular to just kill you and put you out of your pain. You don't realize just how many times you clench you butt in day-to-day life. After a hemorrhoidectomy, you will, and you will have a whole new respect for old browny.
Can you walk up and down stairs? Well, you can do anything that you want to, but some things will hurt like hell. If you have to walk up stairs, do it one step at a time and go slow. Walking DOWN stairs is a whole different monster. You would think that it would be easier. Well, it is if you pay attention. Remember that "surprise" I mentioned earlier? You will get a lot of them as you learn to walk down stairs. That first step at the top of the stairs caused me many blood curdling screams and utterances of four letter words - Some of which I didn't even recognize and I am a "Master" when it comes to cursing.
When can you sit on a hard chair? I would ask why anyone would WANT to sit on a hard chair, but I suppose it is necessary. I was two weeks in before I could sit on a dining room chair. But, I think this was mostly due to my doofus doctor leaving a three inch long piece of suture in my butt that was scratching the c**p out of me. I ended up having to go to the emergency roor it hurt so bad. The doc kept saying there was nothing in there. The Nurse Practitioner in the emergency room found it and had it out in five minutes. I felt 100% better immediately. I am still sitting on teh fence as to if I will ever use that particular surgeon again. I am back and forth on the matter. One day I say I will, the next day I hope he dies and goes to hell. I will let this matter simmer for a few months while I am recuperating. Then I will be able to say for sure whether I forgive him or whether I will take up the Black Arts and curse him for the rest of his natural life.
When will I be able to drive? To be totally honest, I drove my truck the day after the surgery. To be totally honest, that was the stupidest thing I have ever done in my life. I needed to go to the grocery store to pick up a few things that I had failed to get on my "before surgery" shopping s trip. It took me 40 minutes to walk around just the perimeter of the store. I live three miles fro the store and from the time I shuffled through the checkout line until I pulled into my garage was 25 minutes. Ever piece of gravel on the pavement felt like a speed bump. One of my neighbors carried my milk to my kitchen. The only walking I did for the next three days was to the kitchen and back to the bed, with a few excruciating trips to the bathroom thrown in just to keep me hollering and disturbing the neighbors. But again, I had that wayward piece of suture scraping my insides like an old fashioned gas station attendant cleaning a windshield, so my perspective might be a bit clouded on this issue. My advice would be to stay in bed and starve to death. It would be a less painful way to go. Believe me, I thought about this a lot.
You are four weeks in. How do you feel? How do I feel? I feel like my ass has been operated on. What kind of stupid question is that? Oh, I forgot. I am the one posting the questions. Lets try this again: I am feeling better. It seems that I feel a bit better each day. There are some days that I just feel sick and can't get out of bed. I don't know what this is. I hope he didn't mess something up down there. If I end up dying from some kind of complication, he better hope that there is no afterlife. I will haunt his ass forever if there is. On the "sick" days, I feel flushed and nauseous and get a pain in my lower gut. And no, it is not because I need to take a c**p. I am 58 years old. I think I know when I need to take a c**p. It is getting a bit less frequent, so hopefully it will go away in time.
Did you take a lot of pain pills after the surgery? Folks, I sure find it hard to figure some of you out. You cry and go on about how you can't poop, then in the next sentence you talk about taking pain pills on a regular schedule. Hey Einsteins, pain pills stop your digestive system from working properly. Grit you teeth and put the narcotic pills away. I took TWO 5mg Percocets in the hospital and four generic 5mg hydrocodone pills in the two days after I got home. After that, I took a 500 mg Naproxen at 11am and 11pm for the next week. Then it was down to just an aspirin every now and then. Was I in pain? Well yes. But, I would rather be in pain from the operation than pain from having the poop-chute backed up because of narcotics. You will have to be the judge of what you can stand. I suppose I have a higher tolerance for pain than most people do. I was given a prescription for narcotics that I tore up and handed back to the nurse as soon as I was rolled outside the door to the hospital. Some of you don't realize that you are only making it harder on yourself by eating those things like candy.
How are you passing the time? Books - lots and lots of books. I love to read and love the feel of a book in my hands. But I will have to admit that the electronic reader that I bought before I had the surgery has already been of enough use to more than pay for itself. It is actually a 7in tablet. On the days that I couldn't bear to sit, I used it to get on the Internet, read, and just mess around with. If you are contemplating a surgery of ANY kind, I suggest you buy yourself a cheap tablet. I have a hundred bucks in mine. It has a 1 GHz processor, 1 gig of RAM, and 40 gigs of space. Just try to stay away from places that make you laugh. Laughing tended to cause me to have an ass spasm. That was bad as I laugh a lot. One minute I was laughing and the next I was screaming and cussing at myself for laughing. The worse time was when I was sitting on the commode trying to poop and something funny would pop into my head. I think a lot about funny stuff or just weird stuff, so my warped sense of humor ended up being my worse enemy there for a while. I would be laughing and almost crying at the same time whilst cursing myself all to hell for thinking taking a poop was so funny.
Really? Are the ass spasms that bad? I should slap you for asking that question. Wait a minute, that was me again wasn't it? Are they that bad? Let me put it this way: I have had my appendix removed, I had a shoulder operation because of a softball accident, and I have had two back surgeries because of a broken vertebra. I can say with a great deal of certainty that my ass spasms were the worse pain I have ever experienced in my life. Yours may be different. You may not have any at all. But I did. I never screamed, hollered, and cursed as much in my life as during the first two or three weeks after that surgery. Every one felt like some sadistic sum b***h was stabbing me in the ass with a butcher knife.
Did you ever c**p in your tub or a sitz bath? Hell no, I did not. I am not going to sit in my own sh*t. I have not done that since well before I can remember and I do not plan on doing it again until I am old as hell and in a nursing home - At which time I will probably be sh**ting myself on a regular basis, but it won't matter because I will also probably be senile and won't know any better. How in the world you guys could sit in your own sh*t in a sitz bath is beyond me. And even worse was the few posts I read about somebody sh**ting in their shower. How frigging gross is that? Don't be in such a hurry to cut a log, take a dump, or whatever you might call it. Lay off the pain pills and it will come sooner and easier. I am proud to say that all of my poop went into my commode directly from my butt. That is not to say I haven't come close to sh**ting myself a time or two. But, I haven't and that's what counts. Most of my near accidents came about because I was laughing at something stupid.
Have you sh*t yourself since the surgery? Jesus Christ! What did I just say? Why am I asking myself these stupid questions? Sorry. I piss myself off sometimes. NO - I have NOT sh*t myself. The closest I have some was because I was laughing so hard I barely made it to the bathroom. many of those times was because of something I read on this site. Really folks - when you start talking about sh**ting all over yourself, sh**ting in the shower, sh**ting in the bathtub while soaking, or sitting in your own sh*t while doing the sitz thing, it is hilarious. I know, I know. You do what you have to do. But that is just gross, and funny as hell to me. We all deal with things differently. I choose to laugh and sh*t in the commode.
OK. Is there anything else we need to know? Yes. Get a second opinion from a doctor NOT associated in any way with the one who wants to cut a piece of your ass out. if the second opinion concurs with the first diagnosis, start asking questions. Do NOT go into this think with your eyes closed like so many have done. Know with certainty that it is going to be agonizing as it is probably the most painful surgery that you will ever have. I will say again to lay off of the narcotic pain pills. If you want to eat them like candy, you deserve what you get (which is definitely not going to be an easy c**p). Do not force anything. It will probably be a day or two before you have a BM. That "thing" that feels like you have to pop is just your insides swollen up from the surgery. Don't go sitting on something and straining or you are asking for trouble. Don't go overboard with the fiber. Eat good food and you will get a lot of fiber that way. I have cut down to one glass of cup of orange juiced fiber a day. Don't sit for to long at a time Don't TRY to sit for a few days after the surgery. Stay in bed as much as you can. When you HAVE to get up, shuffle around in your house as much as possible to get a little exercise. this will also help you poop. If you feel something is not right, seek help. If your doctor shoots you a line and says there is nothing wrong, curse him and all his descendants with a voodoo spell and see someone else.
Any final words? Damn. You make it seem like I am dying here. Yes I have one final thing to say: Laugh folks. Hopefully your recovery will only be a few weeks or a few months at most. when it is all over, things will probably be much better than before. Com back and read some of the posts on these sites and I guarantee you that you will have a few laughs - that is if you have nay kind of sense of humor at all. and, don't get upset with your friends if you see them smirking or laughing outright as you tell them all about sh**ting in your tub.
Anything else? Yes. Don't tell people you sh*t in your tub. Some things are better left unsaid. :)
I hope you all have a full recovery and can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I was sure I saw it one night, but it was just the light on my microwave. Be strong.
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Hi all,
I'm a 39 year old male and I have been suffering from external hemorroids for nearly 15 years now, I do a lot of wight training which I'd say flares them up, I usually have them for around 2 weeks, and they can be painful, I have gone through the banding process now 3 times and they keep returning, even with a high fibre diet. My doctor has now scheduled me in for the "big op" to have them removed. I'm absolutely petrified....... I can only take 5 days max of work, Should I go through with this???? Help me.... Also with recovery times etc.. I'm a gay male and want to know how long until I can resume sexual activity.
Any advice before my big day on 23/11/2013 would be great, as at this stage im thinking of pulling out of the surgery.
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Hi Darren,
Do you know what 'stage' your 'rroids are? I had an internal one that would sometimes be pushed back in after I went to the toilet, but sometimes (when constipated and straining) would stubbornly refuse to go back... also skin tags from old 'rroids (I am an IBS sufferer and have had them all my life, esp. worse after two childbirths and following a nasty accident - a fractured coccyx. I have a rectocele following a super fast delivery, too. I had the surgery because I hate how long it takes me to clean up after I go to the loo and was experiencing all the usual symptoms every time the internal pile got bad. It almost felt like it was getting in the way. I am a straight female and I could not imagine anal - number 1 'cos my bum ain't a pretty sight and number 2 'cos it would probably be agony for me with all my problems!
I would say to you straight away that for many people it seems to take much more than a week to feel well enough to return to work and even then it may still be swollen and painful after a B.M. (bowel movement). I had my surgery on Monday, and it's now day 5 of my recovery. The mornings are tough. I spend 2 hours trying to get the B.M. out of the way before I can get on top of the pain and discomfort. I am more swollen down there than I was pre-surgery, but it's supposedly normal. It makes it difficult to keep clean, so the shower hose is essential. I hog the bathroom for 2 hours, lay on my bed almost in tears, and take painkillers (paracetamol and ibuprofen) to try and manage the pain. In my area, they give you laxatives, paracetamol and codeine. My advice? don't take the codeine because it naturally constipates you. It's absolutely vital to start a healthy diet immediately; fruit, soup, nuts, dried fruits, veggies, chicken and fish. AVOID coffee, alcohol, and drink at least 2 litres of water every day.
It is hard to advise you how soon you can resume your love life. Or your work, for that matter, esp. because of the nature of your work. I do think it would be realistic to expect that you'll have to have a few WEEKS off work, not days. The same goes for sex. Maybe if you can't get more time off, just in case, would it be sensible to hang on?
I'll be honest. Right now, I regret having the surgery. It is considered to be one of the most painful surgeries you could have. A big decision, and sadly Doctors don't seem to give very accurate information about recovery. Mostly because every individual is different, and every surgery.
Good luck whatever you decide.
Mandy
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