Why Do Poor Parents Raise Their Children Differently?

Do working-class children often grow up to be working-class adults because their parents failed to practice concerted cultivation? Before we can even ask this question, it would be prudent to remember that it is hard to ferry your children to tons of extracurricular activities when you are busy working three jobs to make ends meet, never mind that it is hard to actually pay for those activities. It would be prudent to remember, too, that finances dictate whether a parent has the time to spend in constant dialog with their children, and that stress caused by worries over bills or lay-offs at work may prevent a parent from bonding with their children over intellectual conversations during family dinners. Finances dictate whether and how much a young person has to work to be able to support themselves through college, too. 

Finances impact parenting styles, but do parenting styles impact financial outcomes for a child more than their income level and day-to-day realities during childhood? A much larger study of 11,000 children conducted by researchers from the University of London's Institute of Education showed that economic class had a much larger impact on children's school performance than parenting techniques, including whether or not parents read to their kids before bedtime. Children of parents in managerial positions and professional jobs were at least eight months ahead of their peers whose parents were socially poor and frequently unemployed, regardless of how they parented.

Encouraging poorer parents to adopt the same parenting methods that make middle-class children successful later in life may not be the magic solution, then. 

The Golden Middle Way?

If you are wondering what you can learn from Lareau's work, that's not so simple either, but there's plenty to learn nonetheless. Lareau admitted that middle-class children were exhausted from a rigidly structured schedule that left them with little free time, while working-class kids had more energy, knew how to entertain themselves, and enjoyed closer relationships with members of their extended families. 

Yes, participating in a few extracurricular activities can help kids find their passions. Yes, engaging children in conversations that encourage critical thinking and standing up to authority when needed will offer skills that benefit a person throughout their life. But also, having the freedom to spend unstructured time pottering around can be truly liberating and meaningful, and close ties with extended family are priceless. 

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Ultimately, as Lareau pointed out, we all want our kids to thrive and be happy. No matter our financial situation, we can learn from other parents' practices and enrich our own kids' lives with them, helping them become those happy and successful adults. Thankfully, it's how the children themselves define that happiness and success that matters most at the end of the day, whether they become a plumber or a doctor.