So, ive been dealing with this since i was 18, now im 22. Its is pretty common as i have come to realize. Of course your girlfriend might think its ridiculous. Basically it can hit you anytime. I noticed that usually the first time i was with a girl it was new so i was a little nervous so i most often had problems. but as i continued to have sex with the same girl i became more relaxed and comfortable with her. Just have to tell her that it happens when you are nervous. Because of the pressure. Most girls understand and don't really seem to mind.
I have had relationships where the first time was the only incident and had sex dozens and dozens of times after with no single incident. and then i had other relationships where for months its a reoccurring problem. Ive noticed it has two factors. One its how confident you are in yourself. And this can be from having successful sex and feeling good about yourself while being with that girl. The other is the girl. Some girls have low self esteem and when you don't perform they get upset and think its their fault and can get upset and that just makes the problem much worse because theres a lot of extra added pressure.
But it all boils down to pressure to do it right. Instead of trying to just have sex and enjoy it, your just worrying about not screwing up this time. And when you go into anything thinking DONT MESS UP, DONT MESS UP....you usually mess up. Instead think of you goal and try to enjoy it. Envision it before hand. Psych yourself up for it. Just remind yourself how much you want to nail her. and it will come around.
Also don't jerk off before. It just makes it harder to stay hard.
I have had relationships where the first time was the only incident and had sex dozens and dozens of times after with no single incident. and then i had other relationships where for months its a reoccurring problem. Ive noticed it has two factors. One its how confident you are in yourself. And this can be from having successful sex and feeling good about yourself while being with that girl. The other is the girl. Some girls have low self esteem and when you don't perform they get upset and think its their fault and can get upset and that just makes the problem much worse because theres a lot of extra added pressure.
But it all boils down to pressure to do it right. Instead of trying to just have sex and enjoy it, your just worrying about not screwing up this time. And when you go into anything thinking DONT MESS UP, DONT MESS UP....you usually mess up. Instead think of you goal and try to enjoy it. Envision it before hand. Psych yourself up for it. Just remind yourself how much you want to nail her. and it will come around.
Also don't jerk off before. It just makes it harder to stay hard.
Loading...
Hey, im 16 and have exact same problem, thanks for these messages, it kinda calmed me down, and I know im not on my own, thanks!
Loading...
hi im 17, for like the last two days i havent gotten a fully hard on wen messing around with my gf ive been with her over 9 months and this was never a problem before. i want her realy badly it just doesnt get hard. it gets a little but then it goes away. i dont know wats wrong with me. y cant i get hard. i do put pressure on myself, and take it personal that it wont get hard also my gf thinks im not attractd to her anymore . wen i realy am.
Loading...
maybe ur just picky with females maybe u beat ur meat to much..lol..i lose erection b4 sex when i get head im fine but if i see sumthin un attractive i lose it im very picky about how a female looks i can smash no fat or a female with rolls
Loading...
hey one day after i was finished masturbating i felt a pain near my abs andand under my testic.
the other day a gurl grabbed my penis and it was smaller than usually and ever since i masturbated that day my penis cannot get hard on my own i must be watching porn to get hard
can a docter please help me im scared to goto a docterY_Y
please any1 noes a docter please asked them for me
and get back to me please.
i need help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
the other day a gurl grabbed my penis and it was smaller than usually and ever since i masturbated that day my penis cannot get hard on my own i must be watching porn to get hard
can a docter please help me im scared to goto a docterY_Y
please any1 noes a docter please asked them for me
and get back to me please.
i need help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Loading...
damn im so glad to hear that im not the only one with this problem. im 19 a freshman at the u of a and twice already ive had the chance to have the craziest sex of my life but couldnt get it up!! last friday there was a girl BEGGING me to have sex with her and i couldnt get it up!! I do believe however that this is all anxiety because whenever my girlfriend in HS even walked in the door i would be hard as a rock waiting to serve her a nice meaty penis sandwhich. I was however able to have sex with another girl after her but we were rudely interrupted by the neighborhood security. i've also noticed that the hotter the girl is the easier it is to get hard haha but i guess thats not rocket science. eating the p***y always gets me hard but im definately not doing that with girls i meet at college parties.
anyways gentleman, its nice to know that im not alone on this daunting journey. I will hopefully be putting my anxiety to rest and will fulfill my penis's wildest college dreams. i will keep you posted. until then...goodnight. and good luck. godspeed gentlemen.
anyways gentleman, its nice to know that im not alone on this daunting journey. I will hopefully be putting my anxiety to rest and will fulfill my penis's wildest college dreams. i will keep you posted. until then...goodnight. and good luck. godspeed gentlemen.
Loading...
Hi guys.
I'm 42 and also have this problem... this is like domino effect. It can be fine for months, than 1 time something goes wrong , don't get strong erection when I need it and for weeks I have problem with intercourse. The penis is soft just before or becomes soft during the intercourse... even viarga doesn't help.... I realize that this is because of the psycological issues, but I cannot overcome it...
And what is the solution.? Maybe to try using penis pump?
I'm 42 and also have this problem... this is like domino effect. It can be fine for months, than 1 time something goes wrong , don't get strong erection when I need it and for weeks I have problem with intercourse. The penis is soft just before or becomes soft during the intercourse... even viarga doesn't help.... I realize that this is because of the psycological issues, but I cannot overcome it...
And what is the solution.? Maybe to try using penis pump?
Loading...
I'm 21 same problem, I love my girl, she is great and understands me in every level. But, when it comes down to the real deal it makes me sad. I feel very comfortable next to her, and whenever she rubs me I get a hard, sometimes when we play in bed a bit same thing happens. Then trouble comes when I try to penetrate her, my guy just dies on me, and some other times when she gives me a BJ my guy just dies on her mouth, it is sad. I thought I had to take some pills to get it going but that's not the case. The thing that helped me was staying relaxed, taking it slow, staying healthy, and turning off your net porn! Jerking before it happens is just another way to shoot yourself on the foot. My word is to save yourself to your girl and relax. Also I would rather keep this to myself but smoking some helps.
Loading...
i have the same problem guys, i NEVER get hard it f***ng s***s im tired of it... Viagra me? i had a chance to f**k tonight and it didnt happen cuz i couldnt get hard!
Loading...
I am 22 and had a similar story as others. Dated a girl for a couple years, always had great sex. Broke up, had sex a couple times after, but increasingly having trouble staying hard. I'd try getting a bj before intercourse, but then I'd just cum really fast.
I know it's just stress - you feel your stomach cramp, hands get cold, sometimes I'd shake a little.
I still haven't figured out a solution, but here are three things I suggest:
1) Stay warm. When your hands get cold, it's because your body is sending blood to your organs (IE, your heart) and not your extremities. But this means there's not much blood for your penis! So consider staying under the covers, for example.
2) Foreplay - This helps you relax, and warms you up. Tell her you want to take it slow. She may think it's weird, but f..k her. Literally, hopefully.
3) Have relationship sex. Trying to have a one nighter with a hot girl may sound great, but you're going to be nervous! Try dating someone, really slowly work your way up to sex. Let her know about your problem, even. (It sounds lame, but girls don't have any idea. It'll take the pressure off, and she'll probably think it's cute.)
4) Lastly, and I don't want to recommend this as a fix, but if smoking pot helps you relax, try doing that first. Don't smoke too much, you don't want to be out of it. If you don't already smoke pot, don't start hoping it will help. I smoked for over two years before it relaxed me (before that I would just be spaced out all night off one hit.)
Hope this helps somebody.
I know it's just stress - you feel your stomach cramp, hands get cold, sometimes I'd shake a little.
I still haven't figured out a solution, but here are three things I suggest:
1) Stay warm. When your hands get cold, it's because your body is sending blood to your organs (IE, your heart) and not your extremities. But this means there's not much blood for your penis! So consider staying under the covers, for example.
2) Foreplay - This helps you relax, and warms you up. Tell her you want to take it slow. She may think it's weird, but f..k her. Literally, hopefully.
3) Have relationship sex. Trying to have a one nighter with a hot girl may sound great, but you're going to be nervous! Try dating someone, really slowly work your way up to sex. Let her know about your problem, even. (It sounds lame, but girls don't have any idea. It'll take the pressure off, and she'll probably think it's cute.)
4) Lastly, and I don't want to recommend this as a fix, but if smoking pot helps you relax, try doing that first. Don't smoke too much, you don't want to be out of it. If you don't already smoke pot, don't start hoping it will help. I smoked for over two years before it relaxed me (before that I would just be spaced out all night off one hit.)
Hope this helps somebody.
Loading...
A couple of thoughts on this:
a) You are certainly not alone. ED is an extremely common condition, but most men are too embarrassed to talk about it.
b) ED is not an old man's disease, it can strike at any age.
c) ED is easily treatable and Viagra is not the only solution available.
d) If you think you suffer from any form of sexual dysfunction, go see a urologist. Even if your problem is purely psychological, a urologist can help you.
e) Among young men, ED is usually psychogenic - e.g. anxiety related. ED is, however, a multifactorial condition and there could be an underlying organic cause that you're not aware of (e.g. high blood pressure, heart disease). Again, only a urologist can determine the exact cause of your problem and prescribe an effective treatment.
f) Depression is also a major cause (and consequence) of impotence and most antidepressants can worsen ED.
g) I used to suffer from sexual performance anxiety and in my case, Seredyn was helpful. Seredyn is not an ED drug, it is a natural supplement for the treatment of anxiety that has no sexual side effects. I take it on demand, 30 minutes before sex, and it helps me to control my nerves. Always talk to your doctor before you decide to take any new drug or natural supplement.
a) You are certainly not alone. ED is an extremely common condition, but most men are too embarrassed to talk about it.
b) ED is not an old man's disease, it can strike at any age.
c) ED is easily treatable and Viagra is not the only solution available.
d) If you think you suffer from any form of sexual dysfunction, go see a urologist. Even if your problem is purely psychological, a urologist can help you.
e) Among young men, ED is usually psychogenic - e.g. anxiety related. ED is, however, a multifactorial condition and there could be an underlying organic cause that you're not aware of (e.g. high blood pressure, heart disease). Again, only a urologist can determine the exact cause of your problem and prescribe an effective treatment.
f) Depression is also a major cause (and consequence) of impotence and most antidepressants can worsen ED.
g) I used to suffer from sexual performance anxiety and in my case, Seredyn was helpful. Seredyn is not an ED drug, it is a natural supplement for the treatment of anxiety that has no sexual side effects. I take it on demand, 30 minutes before sex, and it helps me to control my nerves. Always talk to your doctor before you decide to take any new drug or natural supplement.
Loading...
I mentioned ED, doctors and treatment options but I'm sure you won't need any of that. Don't worry, you are young and healthy and I'm sure things will improve soon. If the situation persists, however, go see a urologist.
Loading...
I am 20 years old and have the exact same problem. Several years ago when I was about to have for the first time I was extremely drunk and could only get semi erect. Since then I've been with several different girls and each time I'm hard as a rock until I'm actually supposed to penetrate her then I go limp. It really sucks and I'm still a virgin because of it. Every time it happens I get anxiety and start to over think everything and the cycle repeats itself. I could have had sex last night with this awesome and very sexy girl but the same thing happened. It makes me feel a lot better to see that this problem is more common than I thought.
Loading...
hey guys ive got a very similar problem
ive always been able to get hard with my gf of like 9 months and have good sex but one night i masturbated without knowing my gf would be coming over later that night. consequently, i couldnt get hard and felt like i disappointed her. Ever since then my erections are soft and i get really nervous before we do anything. Do i need medication or can this be solved by just being relaxed
ive always been able to get hard with my gf of like 9 months and have good sex but one night i masturbated without knowing my gf would be coming over later that night. consequently, i couldnt get hard and felt like i disappointed her. Ever since then my erections are soft and i get really nervous before we do anything. Do i need medication or can this be solved by just being relaxed
Loading...
Yes, it is extremely common but most men are too embarrassed to talk about it. I'm not a doctor, but I have three suggestions that may help you guys (I used to have the same problem and they were helpful in my case).
First, you could try a penis ring. It's not very comfortable and your partner will see it but it will prolong your erections and make them harder. The ring constricts the blood vessels near the surface of the penis that drain blood out of the shaft but it does not constrict the arteries that bring blood into the penis to form an erection - that's the beauty of these toys! You should therefore put the ring BEFORE the erection and not after. Don't wear it for more than 30 minutes, though.
Secondly, try to find a position that favours penetration. In my case, I prefer the woman on top: she will be more active and have all the 'hard work'.
Finally, if you're wearing a condom (and you should always wear one!), ask your girlfriend to put it on you. Putting a condom is always an awkward moment and many men may lose their erections because of that.
First, you could try a penis ring. It's not very comfortable and your partner will see it but it will prolong your erections and make them harder. The ring constricts the blood vessels near the surface of the penis that drain blood out of the shaft but it does not constrict the arteries that bring blood into the penis to form an erection - that's the beauty of these toys! You should therefore put the ring BEFORE the erection and not after. Don't wear it for more than 30 minutes, though.
Secondly, try to find a position that favours penetration. In my case, I prefer the woman on top: she will be more active and have all the 'hard work'.
Finally, if you're wearing a condom (and you should always wear one!), ask your girlfriend to put it on you. Putting a condom is always an awkward moment and many men may lose their erections because of that.
Loading...