Feeling depressed after stopping the birth control pills?

That's awesome! Congrats on coming so far and feeling so much better a year later :) I'm sorry you struggled with ROCD...I've read almost all of the posts on this board and it seems that a lot of women have struggled with it as well. I am curious, did you have any other symptoms when coming off the pill? Or was it mainly the ROCD?

It was definitely mainly ROCD. But yes, I had other symptoms as well. I think the ROCD caused me to have anxiety and depression. I remember around the 1st month off I couldn’t get out of bed and I didn’t want to eat. It was right around the time I was graduating high school and I just didn’t want to do anything. It was really upsetting and draining for me. I would sit in bed and shake myself to sleep and then wake up with the worst anxiety that my stomach hurt and my legs are weak. I think all of this happened because I kept thinking, “oh my relationship isn’t the same” and that thought caused me so much pain. I also was very irritable and moody all the time! I felt so bad for anyone who would piss me off but I couldn’t control myself lol. I definitely had some weird acne in the beginning of this; on the sides of my face. I never had acne before so that was interesting to deal with and I also had a numb spot above my knee for about 7 months. I got blood work done and everything seemed to come back “Normal” but I don’t really doubt it. I wish you the best of luck and never give up on yourself because everything happens for a reason. Who knows why we are all going through this terrible experience but it definitely will make us stronger.

That totally makes sense - thank you for responding! My anxiety is more focused on my health right now because for the first few weeks I had not idea what was wrong with me, I still sometimes worry that I may have an undiagnosed disease or condition, but then I remember when this all started and realize that it is the birth control and hormones causing these symptoms. I am also really moody and irritable a lot of the time nowadays - its tough being around people right now because the littlest things make me annoyed/upset and its stuff I wouldn't even think about or be bothered by before this all happened. I also noticed that I hate being in loud environments. I've also had numbness in different parts of my body - mostly arms and legs, it usually comes and goes. Thanks so much and I wish you continued healing! Everyone on this page is fighting/has fought such a difficult battle, its amazing to me that this isn't a bigger known issue.

Hello girls!
I have been on birth control only for 21 days, and I got off cold turkey because already after one week on it I got horrible cramps and most unmanageable part is mood.
I am one week free of BC, I am not crying all day like I was on the first week, but still really depressed and anxious... and my worst fear is that I have these sexual OCD. It is unbearable, I feel so guilty, bad and anxious of these thought that I want to throw up...
Have you had something like this? I am so scared that these thoughts shall never leave me... I never ever had this thing, before I got on BC...

What’s sexual OCD? would you be able to describe your symptoms further?

Hey! First of all, so sorry you're going through this... I am about 5 weeks off of BC now and I also still struggle with anxiety, intrusive thoughts, and depression at various times during my cycle. So just know, you are not alone. My anxiety/OCD is centered more around my health. I'm not sure what you mean by sexual OCD, is it having to do with your relationship? The thoughts will leave you though, it is just the birth control withdrawal and hormones messing with you... it is not permanent and in time they will pass. Hang in there! For me, I have found that therapy helps a lot and I take an anti-anxiety medication too (but that is a very personal choice) and both of these help. I Also do acupuncture once a week and this helps to relax me and allows me to sleep better than I ever have. If you ever want to talk, let me know, please know you are not alone - there are tons of women on this forum who have gone through similar issues coming off the pill.

I am too shamed to describe them. But these are inappropriate sexual thoughts... :(

Thank you, Anna for your answer!
I hope you and every other girl will recover 100% soon!
I am on the end of my first week free of BC.
It is just awful that 21 on day on the pill can make you miserable for so long...
I had so many plans for May, but now I can't find motivation to take myself out of bed.
Worst week in my life.

Hopefully you recover quickly! how do you think I feel dealing with this for a year, it’s miserable. One thing I could say though is that my days are mostly good days with some bad days in between. The only thing that sucks is that on the bad days I kind of forget that I even had good days. Usually it’s bad for me before, during and a little after my period

I feel sorry to hear that. You are really strong and I hope you will have more good days and almost none bad days!
I haven't got my first period yet after stopping the pill, so I don't know how that will be. But I can accept all physical pain instead of this anxiety and depression. :(
Xoxo

Hi!
Thank you - I really hope so too. I am 5 weeks off the birth control and have noticed that my symptoms now go away and then come back. Some days they are barely there and other days I can't get out of bed because they are so bad. I'll have a day or two where I feel semi-decent/like I'm moving in the direction of being my old self again and then out of the blue I'll get anxiety or have a panic attack and then be all shaky and I feel like I'll never get better. I agree with you, in your case I'm so surprised that only 21 days on the pill can cause such a reaction! Hormones are crazy though, they can effect so many different things in our bodies. I know what you mean, I had a ton of fun plans for May and for the rest of the summer and now I don't know if I'll be able to do any of them. Its very frustrating, but I've learned you have to take it one day at a time. Even one moment at a time. The symptoms are not permanent, and you'll soon find that you feel them less and less and that they become less intense and some days they will come back - don't let your mind fool you into thinking there is something wrong with you, it is the hormones. I hope you have a speedy recovery and feel better soon. Keep us posted on how you're doing!
Take care,
Anna

Hello Anna, it is me. I don't know how to insert my nickname here without creating an account. So I shall write under nickname "Sunny" (even if I am far far away from being sunny now :) ). And I am sorry for any grammar mistakes, English is not my native language.
Today I have met my doc, and she said that it is the pill that caused all this nightmare, and that intrusive thoughts can be a side effect of hormone imbalance in our body. If you Google you can find that there were researches that hormone imbalance can change something in the brain structure and because of that we start over reacting on things and so on...
And she said that she is very sorry that I suffered so much and that I still do it, so she gave prescription for antidepressant and medicine for anxiety, because she thinks that it is better to live fully even if you are going thru hormone imbalance.
And after 3-4 periods I am going to check my hormones and then we can see what can we fix.
I think I can see light in the end of the tunnel.
So that was my day.
Hope everyone is feeling good, or at least better!

/Sunny

Hi Anna

Thank you for the well wishes :)

I feel exactly the way you're feeling right now... mornings were the worst for me back then. Waking up and feeling anxious right away. I feel weak, dizzy & foggy. I don't feel like myself all day and can't wait til i sleep again so I don't have to endure the pain & fear. It was tiring. But you will wake up one day feeling better.. and you will realize you can function more. Try L-Theanine :)

I remember I was too scared to walk outside too... im scared to faint. Sometimes even walking inside the house scared me. I feel dizzy and lightheaded. I have this pressure in my head thats so weird.. i still have that til now when i get attacks

It will be my 6th month on May 9. To tell you honestly sometimes I can't believe i survived. There were days i thought this is it.. this will be my life forever and it gave me sleepless nights & made me cry a lot. It will get better but its a slow process..

Right now.. the only symptom that i feel are head pressure, dizzy spells & lightheadedness. Mostly triggered by food & when im tired.

I do have days now that i feel 100% better but still feeling on edge. Im starting to get over my fear of crowded places..

Deep breaths Anna when you feel the anxiety kicking in. Essential Oils help me.. lavander and copaiba :)

Writing this right now while suffering an attack. I feel like food triggered it.. ugh i hate it. I feel so lightheaded & all the scary health anxiety came back. Im also on vacation so it succccks! But my attacks now just last 2-4 hours and then ill start to feel better.

How are you feeling this past week Anna?
You're always in my thoughts

MarthA

Hi Martha!
Good to hear from you! I was doing well last week after my period - I felt pretty good most of the time, except for the weird foggy feeling and still feeling a bit tired, but the anxiety and depression had lifted for the most part and I was able to sleep at night with no panic attacks. Then out of nowhere last night before going to sleep as I was laying down and trying to get comfortable I noticed a high-pitched ringing in my head and ears. I tossed and turned and tried to cover my head but it just wouldn't go away. I then started to get anxious and panic and I suffered from another panic attack and had to take my medicine to go to sleep. I woke up this morning feeling shaky, anxious, and just off... I still don't feel well now, I feel dizzy and a bit anxious and just overall not well. Its frustrating because I actually had a pretty good day yesterday - I was able to do stuff, I even went out and swam laps at the pool and felt good after, and thought I was fine. Mornings are definitely the worst for me too, most mornings I also feel weak, dizzy and anxious and around my period I feel super nauseas too. Honestly, the way you described how you are amazed you survived - that is how I feel now. I don't know if I can survive this because of how up and down it has been, the fact that one day I'll feel better and the next day its back to feeling awful just makes me wonder if I will always be like this and I need to just accept it and adjust my life accordingly. I'm so sorry you were suffering an anxiety attack as you wrote that post - did it pass by now, I hope? I also feel lightheaded and very worried for my health, so I know how awful that is. For me its almost every day I feel like that right now. I hope you get to enjoy your vacation! Also, you mentioned that food may have triggered your attack, its funny you said that because I feel like when this whole thing started I definitely became more sensitive to certain foods and especially drinks - like I absolutely can't have anything with caffeine or alcohol anymore, not even a small iced tea or glass of wine with dinner, my body and brain will FLIP OUT if I do. its awful. Anyway, sorry this is so long! I hope you feel better and your attacks become less and less and completely go away. You are in my thoughts as well!
Anna

Hi Sunny!
Its good to hear from you again :) I'm glad that your doctor was able to diagnose the issue as hormonal imbalance. I hope the medicine she prescribed helps you with the anxiety and depression. Are you feeling any better today? How was your weekend?
Anna