I believe many young boys who started masturbating early have tensed legs to reach orgasm because it is a learned behavior. The focus has come to the point that one cannot be reached without the other. To overcome this it's simple but not so simple.
To unlearn something, you must put less emphasis on reaching orgasm in the first place. That's the first mistake. Let it come naturally. The tensed legs come into play because you know your about to come and start tensing. However, when you relax your focus has shifted so much on relaxing that you become side tracked and can't come.
I can do it both ways. The answer? State of mind. Depending on my mood i consciously clench sometimes and reach strong peaks, but sometimes relax and not focus on climax and enjoy the journey. Sounds cliche but it's very true.
Think of clenching as trying to force an orgasm. LIke your on some kind of time schedule. You'll notice that the more you just enjoy the journey, the less you'll try to focus on trying to relax, and just naturally let what whatever is revving your engine do the work.
To unlearn something, you must put less emphasis on reaching orgasm in the first place. That's the first mistake. Let it come naturally. The tensed legs come into play because you know your about to come and start tensing. However, when you relax your focus has shifted so much on relaxing that you become side tracked and can't come.
I can do it both ways. The answer? State of mind. Depending on my mood i consciously clench sometimes and reach strong peaks, but sometimes relax and not focus on climax and enjoy the journey. Sounds cliche but it's very true.
Think of clenching as trying to force an orgasm. LIke your on some kind of time schedule. You'll notice that the more you just enjoy the journey, the less you'll try to focus on trying to relax, and just naturally let what whatever is revving your engine do the work.
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You guys are tensing your leg muscles because when you are aroused, the blood rushes to your penis. Making your legs tense is a way to keep the blood flowing there--and only there. The only way to get around it is to train yourself to try and keep your legs normal.
I'm a girl and I do it too. It's hard to stop though, I can't get an orgasm without doing it
I'm a girl and I do it too. It's hard to stop though, I can't get an orgasm without doing it
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Finally, I am not on my own!!!
I can only come when I tense the muscles in my vagina and keep my legs straight.
I don't know why, but it just feels so much better when I tense.
Even if I tense the muscles in my vagina when I am not properly sexually aroused, I get a minor feeling in my groin that almost feels like I am going to come.
I can only come when I tense the muscles in my vagina and keep my legs straight.
I don't know why, but it just feels so much better when I tense.
Even if I tense the muscles in my vagina when I am not properly sexually aroused, I get a minor feeling in my groin that almost feels like I am going to come.
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I've had the same thing for as long as I can remember and it's been driving me nuts - I would love to be able to come during sex.
After reading a few of these pages, I've been working on unlearning it and have recently had my first orgasms with bent knees.
This is what's been working for me. I first found a time when everyone was out of the house and started messing around with my vibrator with my legs slightly bent. After a while, I started to feel the usual waves, but resisted the temptation to straighten up and seal the deal. I kept myself going and after a while the top half of my body started bucking up. This made me think that tensing my legs was perhaps not so much the only way I could have an orgasm, but more how I had learnt to control my orgasms and stop movement in other places. So instead of tensing and holding the movement in, I tried turning my head from side to side, lifting my hips up and down, rolling onto my side and back again - basically, doing anything that forced me to break my usual pattern of masturbation. It felt a bit odd to start with, but the results came quickly. When I felt like there was a chance I could come, I started tensing my pelvic area in pulses. I've been working on this for a while now, I've had a few orgasms with my legs bent and they are completely different to what I was used to. Initially I felt out of control, my body would move in weird ways, I'd make noises I'd not made before, if felt like I might wee at the same time. Gradually I'm relaxing and they're getting easier to achieve.
All of this has led me to the conclusion that, for me, tensing my legs has been about controlling my orgasms rather than really enjoying them. I reckon I'm a way off being able to have them during intercourse, but I'm committed to the cause.
After reading a few of these pages, I've been working on unlearning it and have recently had my first orgasms with bent knees.
This is what's been working for me. I first found a time when everyone was out of the house and started messing around with my vibrator with my legs slightly bent. After a while, I started to feel the usual waves, but resisted the temptation to straighten up and seal the deal. I kept myself going and after a while the top half of my body started bucking up. This made me think that tensing my legs was perhaps not so much the only way I could have an orgasm, but more how I had learnt to control my orgasms and stop movement in other places. So instead of tensing and holding the movement in, I tried turning my head from side to side, lifting my hips up and down, rolling onto my side and back again - basically, doing anything that forced me to break my usual pattern of masturbation. It felt a bit odd to start with, but the results came quickly. When I felt like there was a chance I could come, I started tensing my pelvic area in pulses. I've been working on this for a while now, I've had a few orgasms with my legs bent and they are completely different to what I was used to. Initially I felt out of control, my body would move in weird ways, I'd make noises I'd not made before, if felt like I might wee at the same time. Gradually I'm relaxing and they're getting easier to achieve.
All of this has led me to the conclusion that, for me, tensing my legs has been about controlling my orgasms rather than really enjoying them. I reckon I'm a way off being able to have them during intercourse, but I'm committed to the cause.
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ITS THE SAME THING WITH ME, AND IM WORRYING! I don't want to have sex and not be able to cum. It'd be embarrassing! At least im not the only person with this problem though, and it IS a problem! (i'm 17 by the way) and im going to attempt to train myself not to, but i doubt i can. Anyway if you figure out anyway of overcoming it please let me know :-)
Thanks XD
Thanks XD
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Im a male too and it has been a problem for me. I could not reach orgasm without tensing my legs. Hopefully I could train myself to cum with my legs apart and my knees bent.
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anonymous wrote:
Omg I'm soo happy I thought I couldn't come without tensing my legs but I just tried and it worked, I was doing it for about 10 times the time I normally do and if felt slightly different, my tip is if u can't do it try not masturbating of having sex for a few days and then try :) THANLYOU :)
Guest wrote:
senorscott wrote:
I am a male and I have this problem. I have tried to have sex in different positions, but I still have to stiffen my body. I have never been able to orgasm during sex because of this. I really need a cure for this or else I'm doomed to a life of celibacy.
Finally!! I'm not the only guy who has this, when I'm masterbating I cant cum unless i tense my legs, I've had 4 sexual partners and I hav'nt been able to come with a single one of them because I havnt been able to tense my legs like I do when I masterbate, this is such an agony for me and my previous partners as its frustrating as hell. Please oh please!!! somone help us!
Just learn to cum without tensing them. I thought that i couldnt cum unless my legs were tensed but i had actually never tried masturbating without my legs tensed. Just lube yourself up well and concentrate on not tensing your legs. It may take you a while but keep at it cos after the first time i was able to cum without tensing it almost becomes second nature. Good luck :D
Omg I'm soo happy I thought I couldn't come without tensing my legs but I just tried and it worked, I was doing it for about 10 times the time I normally do and if felt slightly different, my tip is if u can't do it try not masturbating of having sex for a few days and then try :) THANLYOU :)
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all of that leg tensing i went through and there is no problem to trani yourself not to lock up. the best advice and simple solution is...... STOP MASTERBATING SO MUCH!!! ur training ur penis to withstand more pressure from hand and leg and losing sensation. go 2 weeks without touching yourself and youll see u are more sensitive and will cum without locking legs. KIds.
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Just set aside a loat if time (hours if need be) and go for it concentrating on keeping your body relaxed. It will happen and if it doesn't right away, don't revert - it will be better not to come right then than have a relaxed-bodied orgasm later. It has to happen eventually.
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Guys, when you say you tense your legs, are you saying that you clamp them together, or that you keep them rigid and tightly contracted while pumping your penis?
I was going to suggest that either you are increasing your blood pressure by doing this "tensing" OR you may be describing contracting your PC muscles, which also is a known stimulant to masturbation, but can be a distraction when trying to have intercourse with a partner.
Good luck all.
I was going to suggest that either you are increasing your blood pressure by doing this "tensing" OR you may be describing contracting your PC muscles, which also is a known stimulant to masturbation, but can be a distraction when trying to have intercourse with a partner.
Good luck all.
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I have the same problem in fact it sometimes gets to the point where i have actually pulled mussules... me and my girl friend tend to do whatever works for her and i dont flex my legs then we go to the "doggy style" position. this allows me to strech my quads a lot and other mussles to a lesser extent which works for me
also one thing we are forgeting. Having to flex to orgasm really does wonders for leg deffiniton and a great butt :-D
also one thing we are forgeting. Having to flex to orgasm really does wonders for leg deffiniton and a great butt :-D
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This trail is very interesting. To all who are contracting their legs: Do you also suffer from too tight legs during the day? Meaning you could experience lower back problems, due to too overly tight legs, which are pulling down.
I wonder if that contracting of the legs is making the legs so tight, that it causes muscle imbalance between the legs and especially the back? Do you experience the described?
I wonder if that contracting of the legs is making the legs so tight, that it causes muscle imbalance between the legs and especially the back? Do you experience the described?
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Yes I do! What should I do to fix it... I was thinking of not masturbating for a while, and hitting the gym to tighten my pelvic floor muscles. That way I should be able to achieve orgasm more easily without tensing, and will sort out any muscle weaknesses using certain gym exercises too.
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All you have to do is really try to come without tensing your legs and eventually it just comes naturally. I'm a 16 year old male and I had this problem when I was 15 and I just tried to un learn and get out of the habit of tensing my legs and it worked, its a relief also because I think that i am ready to start having sex if I want to and I wouldn't want to embarrass myself by tensing my legs when I came and it being really awkward.
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