Very nervous before sex I cant erect!

Bro, I am not gonna bother reading all the other answers.. I had this problem... i eventually managed to overcome it by just relaxing with my girl and taking it slow.. I bet you anything, when sex is mentioned you're heart starts racing, you get depressed and think you're less of a man right?.. DONT WORRY.. it is perfectly normal! just chill out and let things flow as they should.. dont stress about it gng soft or anything.. and if it does.. just stop and try again another time or even a bit later.. but if u talk to ur gf and ask her to just be patient it always helps the situation..

goodluck man! remember thousands of men have gotten over it.. doesnt mean you cant!!

I'm 18 ive got that problem as well. my girlfriend and i have tried probably4 or 5 times and most of the time it doesnt happen because i can't keep an erection. a couple of those times though, i had a premature ejaculation. i sort of understand that i am nervous.. i think the fact that it happened once, just stays in my mind and i always think that it'll happen again. everytime i this happens my girlfriend and i have talks about it. she always tells me that sex doesnt matter to her.. but then other times she says "we will never fully connect until we have sex." that also is always on my mind. its a very difficult situation to be in.. you get embarrased by it and the thought that "it will happen again" never leaves my mind, i have worrying problems in other situations too. so i really don't know what to do. i guess keep trying not think about it.. its bound to happen.. i just hope she doesnt leave me before then.

well, glad to hear i'm not the only one. but my case is a little different....she is just a friend, not girlfriend and we made out two times at college parties, one night she asks me to go home with her and I said yes and got very excited because i knew i was going to lose my virginity. When we were in bed and fooling around i was hard, but the moment i was trying to put on a condom i got really nervous and i lost the erection. she was ok with it and then we just slept. Maybe i should wait to have a serious relationship with a girl..

Hey dudes, I just want to say that this doesn't just happen to those who are new to sex. Believe me, it's not an uncommon thing for younger people at all... I'm currently at university, 19 years old, and had recently broken up with a girlfriend I was truely in love with, and couldn't get an erection when trying it with someone else.

Im in the same boat, glad to know im not alone.  The first time my girlfriend and I had sex i was nervous as ballssssssss.  I get nervous around her a lot, she thinks ima have a hear attack.  But we tried some stuff and I found that a lot of foreplay helped, it got my mind off the nerves for long enough to get hard.  And she is soooo understanding, and the thing I don't get is I'm so comfortable with her, like im not afraid of anything, how i look to her or anything.  

Same here everyone. I tried three times with my ex. but each time We'd both had a few drinks and I don't know if that affects it? anyway, I just couldn't get erect. It was so humiliating, but she understood. We broke up (not over that btw) and I feel like the next woman I meet it's just going to be the same thing. every other situation went perfectly, but when we tried intercourse, it just didn't work. Nice to see people having the same problems and knowing I'm not alone.

Same here I have been with my girl two weeks my emotions for her are as strong as ever we fool around and I'm hard as hell but then when it came down to the real thing I went limp my heart started racing I couldn't believe I was with such a sexy girl it was gonna be my first time but I see now that I need to be more relaxed and let things take its course maybe if I talk to her about it it will help I made up some dumb excuse I just hope next time will be different I can't have another failure to launch the first time was embarrassing enough I don't think I can take another one reading all these stories really brighten my view on the thing I thought there was something wrong with me but I see it happens to a lot of guys these days and I'm not alone

So im sixteen and this same thing happened to me. It was my first time plus her mom was upstairs. I thought that all hope was lost, plus I had to leave soon. I knew I was gonna regret it but I really couldn't get a boner. As I was leaving I was more relaxed cuz I knew it wasn't going to happen. As we started kissing passionately goodbye, i got an erection. No joke, i just said "f" it. It was a good opportunity and i just let her have it. So remember: just don't waste a hard on when u get one!

When I lost my virginity at 15 It didn't have this problem because me and my girlfriend at the time talked through it. But only recently happens when I meet new girls. The advice I can give if your in a situation when you know your about to have sex and feel under pressure, get a drink/shot and try give her more foreplay rather than her do it to you, so when your either performing oral/finger her you can occupy yourself as well without her noticing then go slowly into it then gradually 'full speed ahead'.

Or the best way I do it if you've been in this scenario; you do not find this girl attractive..you can
- drink
- drink some more
- picture another girl
or do it for your COUNTRY!

Been in this situation a couple times I mix it up.

Hope this helps

Hey man, Thought I'd post to help I'm 17 and just lost my virginity with my girlfriend of 6/7 month i had this problem before her and with her at the start so i told her the problem and that instantly helped I felt so much more comfortable and it just seemed to happen! Plus you've not to think about it just let nature take its course and enjoy that's the main thing! Nothing at all to worry about it happens to loads of people!

XD:::::::::::::::: Hey guys out there I've seen all of ur storys it sound sad but let me tell u this is not the end of the world. Just put this tips in ur mind that ur the most special person in the earth Look we all face the same problemes come on we are a man arent we! The secret is dont put all this presure of wrong thougts throug your mind just say to yourself a failed once but i can do better right........ Go out and make friendship wiv girls trust me it helps more you are around wiv girls more confident you will be

GLuck guys:-|

 

Look i know it is very frustrate being in thaat cituation, Dont worry ur not the only dude in that case i'll suggeste that u dont go for any tablets or pills Jst google A2x: Its a very good medecine that keeps you calm plus it contain no drugs on it so good luck character!!

i feel better knowing im not alone but i still dont know what do do im 17 and im still a virgin. im currently in a relationship with some one im seriously in love with and she feels the same for me but there where times when we tried to have sex but i randomly get nervous and loose my boner. while where making out and shes touching me down there im perfectly fine and im turned ALOT but once i take it out of my pants(or when i try to put on the condom) i get nervous and i start to looses my boner so she try's to pleasure me down there but i still lose my boner. the worse part is she thinks that i am getting turned off by HER which is completely false. I feel really horriable afterwards mainly because i made HER feel bad and i told her that its not her its because im nervous but girls just dont understand! what should i do?????? (oh and also her parent were always in another room wen we have tried, besides getting rid of that factor idk what to do i really love her and want to please her :( 

Yeah man. Me and my gf have been together 5 months and whenever we start gettin really into it and I start thinkin about having sex, I get really nervous and my heart beats super fast. I'm a virgin and she isn't. I feel so pressured to do good and every week somebody asks me if we've had sex yet and I just want to get it over with so I'm not nervous anymore. I do love her but I'm ao nervous about it. We almost have a few times but we stopped right before things went any further. One time I came in my pants right before she went down on me. She never found out but it still bothers me. I have no idea why I am so nervous. I've messed around with a lot of girls. I'm so tired of this feeling and it's really frustrating

I used to have the exact same problem and still do occasionally with new girls. Heres the things to watch out for:

1) If she is really pushy for sex but doesn't give you any foreplay then its HER fault. Try and explain that you like her but get nervous so if she could just get you really hard and then let you jump straight in.

The trick is to not big it up too much, remember the vag is like 3 times cleaner than the mouth and is just a very nice place to put your penis. It was designed simply to cause you pleasure and so thats all you should see it as, just something to give you pleasure.

 

2) If you're sure you dont both have any std put a condom on halfway through. Thats what helps me. It lets you relax and remember why people have sex because it feels so good. Once all you are thinking about is how good it feels then you wont be worried about staying hard.

 

3) I had to get some viagra for my first time, my gf was so hairy and unclean down there it was a real turn off. I went to the gp and explained my embarrassing situation and just said that its affecting my mental health and something to help could really help my life. He perscribed some really weak viagra but they still worked whether because i just felt more confident or not i dont know but it was fantastic :).

 

4) You're girlfriend should be able to turn you on. You need to make it clear to her that if she feels your thing and its limp and then she stops and gets all offended that it is THE WORST THING SHE COULD EVER DO. I mean seriously wtf is wrong with some girls they dont have to worry about anything its not easy for a guy to get it up when hes nervous at all!

 

Anyway get her to stay happy, stay smiling and treat it like a mischievous bit of fun for her to perform her job of getting you hard, if she feels like it is soft explain to her you need to feel comfortable with her feeling it like that, explain its not her but that if she likes you to let you relax with a softy and then when it doesnt matter any more *BAM* suddenly you're stroking some fine piece of ass without feeling like you HAVE to get an erection and then my friend you will decide it is time to show her whats what :)

 

Remember to get her on your side, sex is a two-way thing and you should be doing it together, if shes not willing to help then get rid of her. 

 

Good luck!