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I'm really confused. Am I a lesbian Growing up I always imagined myself with men. I had the biggest crushes on male celebs. Always imagined myself going out with them etc. there were guys on my bus who I found super hot even though my friends didn't and I would crush on them, imagine being their gf etc. I was bullied by guys so I was really self conscious. At age 15 i formed a bond with female friend that was the best friendship I have ever had. Age 16 she initiated a sexual relationship with me, I was a bit hesitant but she said it would be good practice for boys (only ever kissed one boy) it would last for about 8 months. I enjoyed it a lot bc it was fun and exciting but I never orgasmed because I don't think inward ever really aroused. I didn't feel unsatisfied by not orgasming bc I don't believe I was turned on. Now I know for a fact kissing guys can get me wet down there and make me feel aroused. And I always imagine myself with hot guys. when daydreaming about things I've done with guys I get little butterflies and feel kinda aroused. I'm just confused as to why i let it happen with her. I cared about her so much she was the closest friend I have ever had. We aren't close anymore though because I feel like I grew up and she didnt. I never imagined myself with a girl and to this day I don't find myself thinking about being with one I should also add, I had major girl crushes but it was more like oh I love her hair i had it. Never omg she's so hot I wanna kiss her. Am a a lesbian in denial or what?

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There is a thing called being bi-sexual. Meaning that if someone has something you like you can become attracted to them man or female.
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I highly doubt it based on what you've said, and taking into account that one's sexuality is based on who you feel attracted to not who you've had sex with (for example there are plenty of lesbians who have had sex with men). From your description I'd say you sound pretty heterosexual, you've just also had some experience with the same sex that you're not interested in pursuing.
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