hi I'm a 15 year old female. about six months ago in November of 2012 i was watching a movie and thought holy sh*t that girl is really pretty. now, before i get into my story I'd just like to say i have no problems with gays, bis or lesbian. i support their rights. however the thought of ME being one disgusts me and makes me sad and depressed. So back to my story. I've always liked guys and never had any interest in liking/ being sexual with a women. Well i saw the girl on the movie and thought she was pretty. that got me to thinking maybe i was a lesbian or bi. i was disgusted by the thought but i can't get it off my mind. about a week ago a girl i never would have thought to be bi came out and said she was bi. immediately i was frightened and to be honest s little grossed out. since then I've been so So so so depressed. I've been sobbing every night and feeling gross. the last few months have made it worse. now i can't stop from looking at every chic and seeing if they have a nice body or but. even if they do i wouldn't ever want to have sex with them or get involved emotionally. but my hocd keeps saying what if you do and you just don't know it? i discovered what hocd was a few days ago. it's gotten so bad i don't even want to live because i think what if this isn't hocd. please somebody help me I'm so depressed i can hardly stand it. about a month ago i started watching lesbian porn...two girls making out or a girl dancing sexually and liked it. that scares the sh*t out of me cuz i feel disgusting afterwards. however have quit watching it and now never want to go back. I've lost all interest i used too have in guys and want it back. i used to be madly in love with and very sexually attracted to one of my fellow swimmers. he left for college in the fall of 2012 and ever since I saw the pretty girl on the movie in November of 2012 and wondered if I'm bi/ lesbian i can't seem to feel the attraction i used to have with him. we were pretty physical though we weren't dating cuz he has a girlfriend. we didn't have sex or anything but he came pretty close to kissing me and he always tackled me or put his very muscular arms around me and stuff. i loved it and was very aroused/attracted to it. now i feel nothing when i think of all the things we did. . I've liked numerous guys and find numerous hot but he was the best. . I've always wanted a family and a husband to fall in love with and have sex with but now i don't feel any of that. just disgust because of my hocd I'm unable to be attracted to a guy and certainly feel disgusted about liking a girl. I'M BEGGING SOMEBODY TO PLEASE HELP ME I HATE THIS SO VERY MUCH.
Honey, I don't think you are a lesbian. You are curious. That's perfectly normal. Girls are pretty and it would not be normal.
Not noticing that. I'm way, way older than you and I've been down that road, and from my experience I can tell you,
It is not body parts you find attractive, it is who you fall in love with. If it's a girl you are thinking about in the middle
Of the night, you might have lesbian tendencies, but there is absolutely nothing, nothing wrong with it. I am straight
I like guys, their hairy chests and all, but I do appreciate pretty woman, but more like a piece of art.
The one most important thing is, do not be ashamed or feel guilty, ever. There is nothing wrong with you.
And if you ever find out you are a lesbian, or bisexual, do not stay in the closet, come out all gay and happy,
And do not let people judge you. Nobody wants to be confused, you did not wish that upon yourself.
You are so very young, things will clear up soon. Soon you will know, and one way or the other, take it as it is,
And be proud of who you are.