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Question: i have just hit puberty at age 45 and i am currently a hermafidite. i have recently noticed that my vag has a unusal and unplesant odor. i have tried everything to make it stop smelling. i have tried to put candy in there including chocolate and jolly ranchers, i have also tried febreezeing it, but it just made it burn, so then i figured i try something a little less harsh, so i used bleach and soap, but that was suprisingly worse. sense chemicals didnt work i tried to a natural approach, i put items in there such as cabbage, bannanas, fish , steak, koolaid, chewing tobacco, cheese, and salami, but nothing will work, i know taht the smell is comming from my vagina bc when i put my penis in there it also smells, will someone please help me

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:-| Answer: The smell that is erupting from your vagina is no doubt a result of your lactating nipples. Also make sure you wear a glove when you make love to yourself because your eggs are definately ready to be fertilized. To stop the smell I sugest wearing scented underwear and keeping baby carrots lodged deep in your cervix. I hope I answered you to the best of your ability.
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Okay now if you are just now hitting puberty then i doubt that you have had sex but if you have there is a std that can cause a stench that smells like fish but if it doesn't smell like fish then it is not an std and just do what the guest but do not use the carrot.
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This is the guest and I have been using the same baby carrots for 6 years straight, and My smell has basically disinagrated. If you wanna check it yourself I will give you my number. Otherwise I think you should shut your damn pie hole before I mollywop you with my enormus penis.
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From ***edited by moderator*** web addresses not allowed

Hello, To answer your questions:

Baby Carrots: Help But only push the problem to your breath. so you might want to pull out the baby carrot while kissing people, and put it back in when waving your vagina in unsuspecting people's faces.

Cabbage:
Helps Also, but it only works if you use the large leafs to cover the flap of the opening.

Fish: Helps by masking the fish smell with real fish smell. If you use fish, dont let the other person know during intercourse, just put a popcorn shrimp in there, and if he/she asks about it, just reply with "Oh, There it is." and offer to share it with your partner.

Jolly Ranchers: Doesnt help as much as mentos.

The Ultimate Cure. To relieve your Monkey butt Symptoms is to Go to ***edited by moderator*** web addresses not allowed and but an all inclusive Monkey butt stank Alarm, that monitors your Ph Level's and Automatically sprays fragrance in side.
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YES JEREMIAH! AWESOME!
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From UberDaddy Post #2.

As previously Stated Before Here are a few more common Home Remedies to help your Vagina Feel better.

Since you stated that you know for sure it's your vagina smelling like that because when you put your penis inside your vagina it smells just like it. Have you checked for any Discharge from your anus? Using Chocolate from your Anus will not help with the smell at all. It might make it taste delicious but it is not efficient of ridding the vagina of the smell.

Have you checked to see if you have recently trapped a racoon or a possum inside there? If it's not that big then you might want to see if a small rodent accidently crawled inside and borrowed a nest. If it did, then you may want to lure them out with small blocks of cheese and a mouse trap attached to your panty liner for proper security.

once Rid of rodents debris and foreign objects, you should look into hiring personal security small enough to guard the cave door of your swamp obyssal. Since Gary Coleman just passed away you might want to seek other small talent elsewhere. And you can train your Vag to say "WhatChoo Talkin Bout Willis?" during your free time to ward off any intruders if you are wanting to save money.

My name is Jeremiah, and I'm from UberDaddy trying to help out.
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User avatar
Health Ace
6889 posts
The solution is really quite simple. Squeeze a bottle of Dawn inside your vj. Slit open the half litre bottle of water you put in the freezer last night and remove the plastic bottle. Shove that in there and wait for it to melt while standing on your head. Then have your brother suds it up with a toilet brush. Now take your fathers Ryobi battery drill and a heating duct brush with the long extenstion on it and ream it out well.

Next chew a whole package of Dentine gum until it's nice and soft, stick it on the end of your enormous tallywacker and do yourself. When you find yourself chewing gum again you're done and it should smell fine. Now do the chewing gum thing 5 times every day and it should stay nice and fresh.
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Thanks for posting the Sick perverted not funny comment to this post.. I swear, some people should just not be allowd to speak.
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i thought this was freakin hilArious!!!!!
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Classic Njoy Classic!!!!!
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hahaaha this has just brought me to tears
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ur just a c**t
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Oh my god.. Why are you people sticking foriegn objects/ food and sh*t up your vag?!GO TO A GYNO!!!!!!! Duh..
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