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So last night I had sex with my girlfriend for the first time (up until then, I had never had sex). We were both very comfortable, and took the necessary measures to prevent pregnancy (I wore a condom and used a spermicidal lubricant). Anyway, during foreplay I had no problem getting stiff, so I put the condom on without a hitch (it was quite tight, but otherwise no big deal). We had sex, and she reached orgasm after a while... but I was nowhere near any state of climax. To be honest, I couldn't really feel anything in terms of sensitivity. In comparison to the dry sex we've been having for the past year (rubbing against each other in underwear), actual sex felt like, well... not much! After I pulled out, my erection was already dropping rapidly.

I'm worried that this might become a persistent problem in our sex life. Did I fail possibly because the night before we had sex, I masturbated? Is my penis not sensitive enough? What can I do to heighten sensitivity during sex? Is there some kind of sensitivity heightening lubrication I can use? I appreciate all the help and suggestions I can get!

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I had the same problem with an ex, try getting a bigger condom. Sounds stupid but my ex put on a normal size condom and pretty much lost his erection. Trojan magnums seemed to work well for him. Be safe & good luck :-)
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I had the same problem the other night, except i wasn't using a condom so that makes me think its me and not anything else. any thoughts on this?
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to the guy who didnt us a condom it might hav been fear of getting pregnant
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OK, there are lots of reasons why you might not have reached orgasm.

First, it's a new experience. Even though we're all sure we're ready, it take a bit of getting use to having intercourse with another individual.

Second, you're wearing a condom, which will naturally shield you from some of the more intense sensation. But trust me, it is completely possible to reach orgasm while wearing a condom. Millions of men do this, and successfully.

I note that you not only used a condom, but also a spermicide lube as well.
Inside or out? That is, were you swimming in lube inside the condom, or was this applied externally to the gal? Some men find they get more sensation when they put a dab of lube on the tip of the penis before unrolling the condom over it. That way the head can move around inside the tip of the condom and get better stimulation. Some find this is not helpful, as it cuts sensation and friction to the head.

YES, you may have certainly blunted your response by masturbating the night before. My personal experience is that when young, I wouldn't be able to respond for at least a day or so after coming.

Most young men will be ready to come quickly, condom or not, if they hold off on masturbation for near to two weeks. Not many do hold off that long. But if you don't have some release, about every 14 days, you'll have one in your sleep.

Will you have this concern throughout your life? Certainly not. You're just getting use to things, settling down into a pattern of expression and expectation.

It really is not unusual for a young man NOT to climax the first time he has sex. Especially if he's using a condom.

Some here have suggested a larger size condom, but I'm not sure how that will help. You certainly could try that, but I'd have a back-up pack incase you find they're the wrong size. You might try a three pack and try to fit one on at home just to see.

Do let us know what works out for you.

And, by the way, in case we forgot to congratulate you.... Good going on being prepared and protected before jumping into sex. Everything will work out, but you're on the right road! ;-)
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It was the complete opposite for me, we were fooling around a bit before sex, we went to put the condom on, and I was already losing my boner, so she licked my penis to get it harder again, and we put the condom on.

Within about 30 seconds of my penis being in her vagina I was cumming, weve has sex again after this and it happened after like a minute...
Does anyone know why or anything? Or help on how to prolong it?

Also, the experts say not to put a condom on the wrong way and then turn it the right way round and still use it, because the condom could get "precum" on it and the girl could get pregnant. What are the chances of the girl getting pregnant by this??

Thanks in advance
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well i was with my girlfriend and i got a boner really easy and then we started having sex and we continued having sex for like 2 hours and i still didnt cum so she tryed other things but it still didnt work and i didnt fell anywhere near to cuming i cant say the same thing about her tho lol :L she must have cumed like 8 times lol :L oh and people say its because its your first time but i have done most other things and i cummed so i dont think its to do with new experience?
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I wish i had your problem
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Well i just had sex for the first time 2 days ago and we didn't just jump into it we messed around a little first and she was ready and so was i. I put the condom on it felt a little tight but i proceeded to have sex with her after about 20 minutes she got really tired and had already cumed about 3-4 times and i wasn't feeling anything really except for warmth don't get me wrong i liked it and had fun but its kinda disappointing that i couldn't even cum. what can i do to fix this?
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It's the condom. It reduces sensitive by a huge amount.

Vaginas have wrinkles and ridges and stuff that rub against your knob. That's a huge part of what makes vaginas so efficient at making cocks cum. Stick on a condom and you no longer feel the vagina wrinkles and ridges, only the tightness. If you're having sex with s**ts you got to stay with condoms. But if you get a regular GF & she's on birth control you can ditch the condoms and things will feel 100x better.
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its probably normal. my boyfriend had that same issue our first time, but after that, he had no problem. I think you just need to get used to it... i know thats how i had to get into having sex. it takes some time to get used to it, lol.
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You're right, it's entirely possible to impregnant only because of pre-cum. That's why you must always use protection.

It's entirely possible that some of you may not be coming quickly because you are satisfied from last night's masturbation.
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Today at around 1:11AM I had sex for the time, I met this girl, we hooked up in the back of my car, we just got right into it, it was not her first time, we had sex for about 10min and we were making a lot of noise, I coulnt cum, my penis was not getting hard, and when it was inside i didnt feel the sensation, maybe because it wasnt hard? My question is why coulnt i cum? i did not use protection.
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STITSO-



As this was your first time, I imagine you were plenty excited and nervous, right? No doubt you felt some pressure to perform, since she was experienced, right? And I'll bet that the back of your car is not the most comfortable place to stretch out.

And attempting sex at 1:11 AM after a full day (I assume you may have just left the bar as it closed down?) is another factor.



I'm not terribly surprised that you were not as successful as you might have hoped. (Yes, a less erect penis tends not to feel as well as an excited erect one. But let's not worry about that... that's a sure way to fail!)



This doesn't mean that your next attempt won't be more satisfying for both. Conditions will be different. You'll know something of what to expect. You'll be prepared. You'll be using protection.



You say you didn't feel the sensation when inside her. (Are you certain you were inside her vagina, and not between her legs?)

She may have been extraodinarily wet (having just lubed up in the bathroom) or while you were getting ready.

She may also have had a child before, which might loosen her, OR she might be just a large vagina woman...



The point is, the first time rarely goes as we expect it will... and not to let that throw you in the future.



A more relaxed setting, a patient understanding partner, and plenty of time, without the fear of discovery or pregnancy or STD... all help.



And, Stitso, you really DO need to use protection. Every time.
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i feel ur pain man first time sex last night as well and after 20 min i couldnt cum i thought i would have exploded already, so i took off the condom and 20 more min pass and nothing i was embarrassed, my girl did enjoy it but i couldnt cum ;/
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