I'm getting married next month my fiance doesn't know i'm not a virgin & i can't tell him & scared to have an operation to remake myself a virigin,can he find out on our first night that i'm not a virign noting that i'v not been sexually active since more than a year..
How can he find out noting that he'd never take me to a doctor to know for sure.
How can he find out noting that he'd never take me to a doctor to know for sure.
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He'll know your not a virgin because
1) You won't be as tight as a virgin
2) You won't have a hymen, therefore won't bleed or be in pain
1) You won't be as tight as a virgin
2) You won't have a hymen, therefore won't bleed or be in pain
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Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.
First of all, shame on you for not telling your soon to be HUSBAND the truth about your sexual past. It's important. Second of all, wanting to lie about it is a bad start to your marriage as well.
There is no way he can know if you are a virgin or not besides trusting your word. The above is wrong because you don't lose "tightness" as you have sex. You may become looser to accommodate a penis while you are having sex, but it will tight up a bit again after you stop. Second, some girls hymens break in ways other than sex. Such as horseback riding, masturbation, tampons, rough-housing, etc. It's also possible to be born without a hymen. Many woman experience no pain and no bleeding the first time (including me.)
Please, tell him the truth. I suspect he loves you enough to hear the truth and stay with you if he's planning on marrying you.
First of all, shame on you for not telling your soon to be HUSBAND the truth about your sexual past. It's important. Second of all, wanting to lie about it is a bad start to your marriage as well.
There is no way he can know if you are a virgin or not besides trusting your word. The above is wrong because you don't lose "tightness" as you have sex. You may become looser to accommodate a penis while you are having sex, but it will tight up a bit again after you stop. Second, some girls hymens break in ways other than sex. Such as horseback riding, masturbation, tampons, rough-housing, etc. It's also possible to be born without a hymen. Many woman experience no pain and no bleeding the first time (including me.)
Please, tell him the truth. I suspect he loves you enough to hear the truth and stay with you if he's planning on marrying you.
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Well I'm sharing my honest oppinion.
I would NEVER do this. You would be living a lie, and if you really love him you need to come out and tell him. As a man I would feel very hurt if you had the surgery and lied to me.
Also, it would be a waste of money.
AND
it will never make you NOT a virgin. Although it may have the affects. You've had sex. You can't undo it
I would NEVER do this. You would be living a lie, and if you really love him you need to come out and tell him. As a man I would feel very hurt if you had the surgery and lied to me.
Also, it would be a waste of money.
AND
it will never make you NOT a virgin. Although it may have the affects. You've had sex. You can't undo it
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Poopa,
I agree with what agent said about the hymen and the tightness. If you have not had sex in a year you will be as tight as a virgin (if you have not been using toys).
But the part I disagree with is telling him. If he doesnt know by now, he doesnt need to know. Girls tell guys their life story but guys always hold stuff back too. *Some things you just gotta take to your grave. Also everyone is assuming you lied to him (wheather you did or you didnot
lie you didnt tell us that part.)
If you and him decided not to have sex until marriage that is all that matters. It does not matter if you have been with 100men before him,
if you are disease free and you are being faithful to him that is all that counts. Opening doors to your past is a bad idea. If he is a virgin tellin him could make him insecure. If he is not a virgin then you are even. Just leave it alone. If you did lie, going back and saying "I have been keeping this from you" could make him not trust you. You dont want to ruin a good thing. If you are a virgin or not is irrelevant. Who cares? Get married and live happily ever after. And if you did lie keep that to a minimum. Good luck.
I agree with what agent said about the hymen and the tightness. If you have not had sex in a year you will be as tight as a virgin (if you have not been using toys).
But the part I disagree with is telling him. If he doesnt know by now, he doesnt need to know. Girls tell guys their life story but guys always hold stuff back too. *Some things you just gotta take to your grave. Also everyone is assuming you lied to him (wheather you did or you didnot
lie you didnt tell us that part.)
If you and him decided not to have sex until marriage that is all that matters. It does not matter if you have been with 100men before him,
if you are disease free and you are being faithful to him that is all that counts. Opening doors to your past is a bad idea. If he is a virgin tellin him could make him insecure. If he is not a virgin then you are even. Just leave it alone. If you did lie, going back and saying "I have been keeping this from you" could make him not trust you. You dont want to ruin a good thing. If you are a virgin or not is irrelevant. Who cares? Get married and live happily ever after. And if you did lie keep that to a minimum. Good luck.
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