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I've recently starting dating a new guy and things had been going extremly well. He claims to really care for me and very strong feelings towards me. He is always saying that he's so lucky to have a girl as pretty and as nice as me actually give him a chance and he's not used to it at all. Basically, he feels that I am out of his league. However, I do not feel that this is true. I find him very attractive. The other night we had our first sexual experience but it was not sexual intercourse. I was touching him through his pants and I could feel that he was hard and when I touched his penis I could feel alot of pre cum. But when I started to give him a hand job he began to loose his erection. He became very upset and embarresed and was scared I was going to leave him. When I asked him why it happened he said it was because he was really nervous and worried that I was going to think that his penis is small. Then he started feeling like he was having a panic attack. After I got him to calm down we started again and he came but it didnt feel like there was that much cum. I asked him if it was my fault and if he even finds me sexually attractive and he said that it wasnt and that he does find me very attractive. He also said that he feels pretty much feels inferior so I'm currently taking this as performance anxeity. However, I really like him alot and Im getting paranoid that maybe he doesnt actually find me attractive enough to turn him on or that he is gay. I worried that its going to happen again. Ive never had any experience with this situation before so I dont really know what to think. He is only 22 so I wouldnt think it would be erectile dysfunction. Also, this apparently happened the first time he ever had sex. Im just really upset about this. Do nerves really effect performance this badly or does he just not find me sexually attractive?


there are many reasons this may occur,

firstly some men will masturbate a short time before they have sex to last longer but this isnt always the case and can result in failure of maintaining erection, others may include he could be intimidated by ur sexual activities in the past ( this was a past problem for me ) if it is just nerves then i have a good solution.

nerves are usally caused by a past experience so do the following things

- dont you start the sexual acts. e.g let him slip the hand, you may be overpowering with him which makes him feel self concious and it wil just you the rep of a s***.

- talk to him! communication is the key - if u ask him "dont u find me attractive," your puttin him down and is makin his problem worse, discuss wat you would like to try ( DONT i repeat DONT ! talk about your past ) talk dirty to him, if your mans never heard you say the following thing say it, this will drive him wild "i want you to put your hard Di** deep inside me baby !" . trust me if its an unusall thing for him to hear, then he will love it.

- EXPERIMENT =D turn the lights on, mabey the tv and just get naked and speak, yous both will feel so open and in secure it will open the relationship up into a whole new level.
Let him play with u, a man gets turned on knowing hes pleasuring his women but help him out. NEVER NEVER NEVER FAKE to enjoy it, if he see's u like somthing, he will continue doing that same thing.

Remember, sex isnt a key part of any relationship so just relax with him and it will happen when it happens. hope it helps ;-)