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Yeah, as I said in a previous post it sounds like she's getting there. I feel a little better. You just have to be patient. It's gonna be a long road with more downs than ups. If you're not patient you will get disappointed and upset, as I've experienced. Just keep busy and try to nurture your relationship. Be there for her too. Good luck.
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Yeah can you explain how you feel better? Like your getting your feelings back? Is it confusing your feelings flopping round? And also I wana thank you from the bottom of my heart for responding to me and helping me. I am truly hurt and lost. Also is there any other forums that have helped you? Please share the link
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Feel better as in I never had another week of depression again. Initially I had one week of depression. Could not eat, get up for work, study or concentrate, work, workout. I did not want to get up from bed. I am still depressed and anxious . I love my boyfriend. I want to be attracted to him again, so im not confused .my body is in withdrawal mode, and the hormones are over the place. These are temporary feelings that even though my brain says to act on them, I am not acting on them. When I say moments of clarity, I mean I feel normal again and in love. You're welcome glad to help. I use this site.

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Yeah I think that's what she is going thru like her mind is saying no but her heart is saying differnt. It hurts me bad I don't understand why this is happening. I wish I knew what I could do to help. I mean if I was in yalls position I'd be losing my mind
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Another I think is that all the girls that are going thru this have read and understand it will get better but y'all are anxious about it and want it to happen now so y'all stress really hard when you go back and forth
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How are you all doing? I came across this and I can't believe what birth control can do (well I hope that that's what's doing it). After about two weeks after I started my birth control, I got severely depressed and anxious (I was also in a course for school that was extremely stressful and the topic was depressing). However, I thought this was all from the course, but my course ended June 17th and I'm even worse, mentally. I have been taking the pill for 3 months, and decided to stop about 3 days ago. During the last week of taking the birth control, I noticed my feelings were changing for my boyfriend of three years, who I am madly in love with and plan to marry and the whole nine yards. I have felt disconnected from him throughout this whole period, but I wasn't connecting it to him, just the depression. Now that I am linking it with him, it makes me so so scared. I wake up feeling this feeling in my tummy that something is just not right. I even get anxious around him now, and when we talk about the fact that we have to move apartments soon since our lease is up, I get so anxious. I want to shake myself saying, "WHY AREN'T YOU FEELING ANYTHING FOR HIM"!!! Because before this, I couldn't see my future any other way and never EVER questioned my love for him. I feel like an entirely different person, honestly. I don't care about ANYTHING I used to, and even trying to do fun things is MISERABLE. What the hell is going on? Also, I've been on the same birth control on/off and it's still the same brand and this time, it took a turn for the worst. I noticed changes in my mood throughout the year, but I cannot remember when I was on/off pill so I cannot correlate it. I just know this time is much, much different. SEVERE depression, anxiety and now this feeling with the love of my life.
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Hi! I am so sorry that you are going through this hell too. I can relate to what you are saying about the weird feeling in your stomach. It is absolutely horrible. I can't tell you how odd it is that one day we were never questioning our relationships, and then weeks later it becomes so cloudy. I have many problems doing fun things now because now nothing is fun! I feel like I don't have anything to look forward to (career wise, social life wise, boyfriend wise). I believed in the whole 9 yards too, and I cannot tell you how MANY intrusive thoughts and really fears I came up with regarding my relationship. I can name a good 20 off the top of my head that literally developed within a month's time. I do the same exact thing. My bf (as I'm sure yours is) the nicest sweetest guy ever. He continues to do such nice things to me, and I feel like I need a course now to learn how to appreciate him again.

In terms of how I am feeling now, this craziness started out with a weeklong depression for me. I thought I was going insane because I was crying nonstop. Literally at my cube at work all the time, thank goodness my boss or anyone else did not catch me at my worst. OCD thoughts all surrounding my bf and our relationship. I tried telling myself to stop thinking but I remember not being able to. Fast forward 2 months from then, and I am just ok. My thoughts are not intrusive but I too wonder when my feelings will be the same. I no longer feel the need to cry around my bf which is great. I have been researching a lot on this (please look up Sheryl Paul, Conscious transitions, sooooo helpful) and thankfully I have been able to silence a lot of my stupid fears that are ridiculous. Now, when annoying thoughts come up I literally have to say to myself "Stop" and can focus on something else. I feel like I have gotten better but I know for sure there is a long way to go. Hang in there, I feel like there is a nice light at the end of the tunnel. I can identify with everything that you feel, and I know it's so hard. I would not wish these feelings on anyone because they are torturous. Feel better! Everyone's body is different, but your body needs to readjust to making its own hormones.Even though your hormones may be ok on tests, other parts of your body may be out of whack, causing this.

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Thank you so much for your reply, you are so sweet. I am so sorry you had to go through this as well, I agree. This is the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with, honestly. I feel CRAZY most of the day, but I am confident it will get better. I definitely know what you mean by intrusive thoughts and OCD, I have experienced that tons too. I think OCD is a big part of depression since you're constantly thinking negatively and having irrational thoughts and being stuck in a rut because of it. I think it helps to write the intrusive thoughts down on paper, they seem less scary for your brain. It's also important that you are NOT trying to FORCE yourself NOT to think about a thought, this makes it more scary. Thinking, and letting it pass is the way to do it. I know, that's wayyyyy easier said than done, I know first-hand. But I've been getting better with the intrusive thoughts. Also, all they are, are simply thoughts. Yes, they are scary thoughts, but that does not mean in any way they will become fact. I think those intrusive thoughts will be completely non-existent when I don't feel depressed anymore because we are hyper-focused on the negative when we are depressed, even anxious.

Ever since I stopped the pill, I have seen very slight differences for the better (I've only been off of them for 3 days). Did you experience severe depression/anxiety on the pill? I even experience brain fog, (like dissociated from the world). Kinda like I feel like I am in a dream sometimes, it's terrifying. I felt it really bad today. I honestly feel so weird all the time, I think because my hormones are all out of whack, obviously. I am also wondering if I have adrenal fatigue syndrome now because my cortisol levels have been flooding in CONSTANTLY, I bet for months straight from stress. The reason I say this, is because I am so so lethargic all the time, even if I get 9 hours of sleep. Like I can pick something up from the floor and stand back up, and that will be so draining. It's even tiring to speak to my boyfriend, lol I feel out of breath.

I do believe the class I was taking put a huge amount of stress on me, but I think the pill took it over the edge, and continued to make me severely anxious and depressed, much after the class ended. I am also reconsidering my entire career, so I am kinda in an identity crisis, lol. I'm really confident the pill just made everything so so so much worse. What is interesting is I was on the lowest dose of the combined bc pill estrogen/progesterone so I must be extraordinarily sensitive?
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Also, what bc were you on if you don't mind my asking?
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Yes. OCD is absolutely annoying. But even though I don't have OCD now, I feel like my boyfriend is always on my mind. Even in the background humming. The only time when he is not is when I am really really busy at work and just trying to get things done. You are 1000% correct. I am so focused on the negative too. It is scary. Along with these intrusive thoughts are things about my boyfriend that I never cared about that now serve as relationship breakers! But I cannot even appreciate all the good things about him. Just solely negative.

I actually did not really have any symptoms on the pill. I was on one pill for a year and all it did was made my period really heavy. So I asked for something else and was given Apri, which is a low dose pill too. I noticed I was more emotional on apri. But never any depression or anxiety. The reason I went on the pill initially is because I worked out way too much, and my period never came as a result which is really bad. Gyno should have never agreed to put me on, but I was younger and did not know how horrible the pill truly is. When I finally decided to come off, I also dramatically lowered my workout regimen and also started a new job. So I wonder if I am also having withdrawals from the endorphins from working out so intensely. Working out does not give me the happiness it used to for sure. But, I can really identify what you are saying about the adrenal fatigue. I am tired all the time, even when I get 8 hours of sleep and do not even workout. It is very strange, but it is definitely something to consider.

I too reconsider my career. When I was in high school, I wanted to be a doctor, since this happened I am thinking I should have been a doctor. I feel like I am in an identity crisis too. It is so annoying. Hopefully this only lasts a short amount of time for you though.
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I'm so sorry. Yea, I have done like ALL my pre-requisites for nursing, and then realized I'm much too sensitive for the field and absolutely HATED it. No clue what I'm doing next. I think I'm just going through major life adjustments, so I am in a funk and don't know how to get out. What ways do you feel with your boyfriend currently?
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Congrats on that! My best friend is in nursing school and I know how hard she works to be in that program. It definitely could be like a mini mid life crisis.

I have a multitude of feelings for him now. Sometimes, which is after a crazy crying spell I get like indifferent, and then there are other times when I'm with him and constantly analyze him and compare him to better looking people.then there are other times when I find that I can be with him and do not analyze him at all. I occasionally walk with my friend and we share our anxieties, so after this therapy session multiple times I found myself not analyzing him. I always find myself missing him all the time now, and our relationship has not suffered. Now it feels like we are friends and my sex drive is non existent, but I continue to always hang out with him and tend to the relationship as usual. I told him how I was feeling and he understands . It's so weird because even with all of the dumb feelings,he is the first person I call or need to talk to when I am having really bad anxiety, and I always want him there to lay on him to feel better. How do you feel?

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I totally understand. How long have you been with him? Do you live with him?
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Like 2.5 years. No, but we've been planning the end of this year.
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Sounds like things are getting better with your feelings with him then? How old are you, if you don't mind my asking? Haha, wish there was another way to talk with you. This seems silly on this forum lol!
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