Feeling depressed after stopping the birth control pills?

I was thinking about the same thing yesterday!Except the thing that comforts me is that what happens to our bodies during pregnancies is natural and we are built to handle it. What we did to our bodies with birth control was synthetic and unnatural so I'd like to think that we won't have the same issues when we are blessed with little angels :) There's a natural progression in the phases of pregnancy whereas we just "flicked the switch" on our hormones when we decided to stop BC...Anyway, I hope you're all having a good day! Hugs for all...

MissHormonal wrote:

JenniferE wrote:

Though I'm healed, I suddenly had a thought today that worried me. What if, when I get pregnant (whenever that is), my body's fluctuating hormones send me down that terrible path again? I realize that this may not be comparable to going off BCP, but I do often wonder if it will be easier to slip back into that mess if I've already experienced it once before. 

I suppose this is a case in which I should remind myself that I'm healed and that I don't have to worry about it coming back, but I guess that's what the negative memories have left behind, a new reason to worry :) Does anyone (who's completely healed) have any insight as to how my hormones might respond to pregnancy given my past experience?

I was thinking about the same thing yesterday!Except the thing that comforts me is that what happens to our bodies during pregnancies is natural and we are built to handle it. What we did to our bodies with birth control was synthetic and unnatural so I'd like to think that we won't have the same issues when we are blessed with little angels :) There's a natural progression in the phases of pregnancy whereas we just "flicked the switch" on our hormones when we decided to stop BC...Anyway, I hope you're all having a good day! Hugs for all...

Very good point! That makes me feel better :)

I too have worried about postpartum depression since it sounds so similar to what we've all been going through. I just spoke to my boyfriend about it the other day. He said similiar things to what has already been said -- These hormones that messed us up were synthetic ones. And also, if we do go through it, at least we'll know what it us and we'll be better equipped to handle it. Plus, like someone mentioned, doctors actually acknowledge postpartum depression unlike these birth control effects.

i've been a little better the last couple of days but still not great. i feel like if i had a good, long run of feeling normal and happy then it'd help me to look back on when i'm having bad days. but until then, it's tough. i had a wonderful night with my boyfriend last night where we were laughing and being cute but the voice in the back of my head kept saying irrational things like, "You're just acting/pretending to be happy" and "You don't really love him." But I ignored them and continued to have fun which was good. Sometimes when I'm really anxious, I can't even joke or be silly with him. I even get annoyed by the silliness. That's the worst part. Sometimes, when I feel like I'm getting better, I almost can feel my mind like snap and bring me back down. It's like it doesn't want me to get better. It's so frustrating. I feel like this anxiety has made me almost phobic of my relationship to an extent and I wish I knew how to fix that. This morning, I woke up with the urge to break up. For some reason, I always get that in the morning when I first wake up. The urge is much weaker, so that's good. But my mind does this annoying thing where it tries to convince me that I wouldn't miss him if we broke up. I would absolutely miss him. I'd be devastated. But even so, my mind does a good job at convincing. I wish my mind would stop trying to sabotage me.

I know what you mean about the "snap". That's a great way to describe the feeling. I still remember when a negative question would pop into my head from nowhere, and I would feel that snap, and then would feel all this adrenaline rush through my body as I started to panic. I don't think I was ever able to avoid those snaps either. I mean, I could cope with help from this forum and my husband, but mostly they occurred without me being able to do anything to stop it.

I hate to say this, but I haven't been super great these last few days. I've been overloaded with stress at work, to the point that I actually cried in front of my principal today (I'm a teacher). It was completely unprofessional and embarrassing to say the least, though he complimented me on my work, it didn't make me feel any less ridiculous for having cried.

Anyway, when things like that happen, even though I know I'm fine, I worry that all those symptoms will come back. It's great to be healed and feel stress the way I used to before the BCP mess, but I still can't help worrying that those terrible times will return. I suppose only time can cure the worry, just like time, patience, and faith will cure all of you someday!

I still haven't heard from any of the women out there who are back to their "old self" like me, and I'd really love to hear from them. I'm sure I still have tons to learn about the effects of this experience on my future wellbeing. Does anyone think it would be a good idea to post on here when we have great days? I know some of you have written a happy letter, maybe it would be good for all of us to share bits of those to keep our spirits up :)

I stumbled upon a Facebook group of "survivors" thanks to a girl from another forum. The girls talking in the group are all doing better but what concerns me is that they're not back to their normal selves. They still have OCD negative thoughts and anxiety. So now I'm a little discouraged. I looked up information for a nearby natropathic doctor that I'm going to call later today. Maybe they can help me balance my hormones. I can't believe taking a birth control pill could inadvertently screw up my relationship with my boyfriend. UGH!

Contrary to the above rant, I think some positive posts would help everyone too. I haven't had a good enough day to write a happy letter yet but I hopefully will soon. Things that have helped a little: vitamins (b-complex and a multivitamin. just started taking primrose oil), books (brain lock, the happiness trap, the power of now, the anxiety and phobia workbook), forums (this one and one on aphrodite's women health), some websites (conscious transitions)... I don't know what else at the moment. anyone have any good suggestions?

ps: sorry you're not feeling 100% but i'm sure setbacks are normal. they are for me (unfortunately)! especially since this is hormonal -- it makes sense that the severity flctuates over the month as our hormones do. be positive -- you've come a long way and you are an inspiration!

the brain snap thing is horrible. it's like I start to feel better or have a moment of love and clarity and my mind snaps me back, almost like it's telling me i'm not allowed to feel better. it's hard to describe.

Ibelieveinus how long have you been off birth control and what symptoms have you experienced and still have

I've been off for six months. i've improved a little but it's still very tough. my biggest issues are obsessive/negative thoughts (specifically doubts about my relationship) and extreme irritability/moodiness. I'm also weepy, anxious, and depressed. My mind is foggy and I am forgetful. Sex is painful. I have intense sugar cravings. I've always had anxiety/OCD but nothing like this. The thoughts about my boyfriend are unbearable and devastating. The post-pill anxiety makes me doubt that I love him even though he's the most wonderful person I've ever known. I'm emotionally numb towards everyone. I have always had the greatest relationship with my mom and since the pill, I borderline can't stand her at times. I've distanced myself from her which is NUTS. She's honestly my best friend in the world. I miss our relationship and I really miss my relationship with my boyfriend. It's awful.

IBelieveInUs, I was going to send you a private message, because my question is a bit personal, but saw that it wasn't an option. So, feel free to not answer the following question, I would understand :)

Anyway, my question is, how is sex painful for you? I ask because I've had a few issues in this area as well and am wondering if it's a lingering side effect of the pills or if it's just a normal part of sex. I was a virgin till marriage. There are several things that could simply be a normal part of it, and I wouldn't know because I have few friends or family I feel comfortable enough to discuss it with (except for my husband that is). I was still dealing with the effects of BCP when I got married, so needless to say, my first experience was probably not the norm.

I would like to add, have you talked to your mom about some of your problems? I was surprised to discover, after a few lengthy discussions, that my sister and a few friends had been through similar issues. Their experiences weren't as drastic as mine, but they were much more sympathetic and understanding than I thought they would be. I guess I spent so much time feeling guilty and negative toward everything, that I hadn't expected so much support from others.

So happy to read that some of you are still having problems 6 months after stopping the pill. I am just 6 months off the pill and still having anxiaty problems. I am having better days than i used to but still becoming very depressed and not feeling myself. I just hope some time soon we all start to feel better

Hi Jennifer,

I have this worry all the time like I think " oh god what if when I have a baby of during the pregnancy if I feel like this all over again" the fear kicks in And I feel panicky .your not alone Jennifer E .

This week I had negative thoughts agai. About my relationship all I cud think about was " what if I don't love him maybe I'm just with him cls we are so comfortable together awww my head was wrecked..... I was due my period Wednesday just gone but still haven't gotten it so I assume my hormones are all I've the place :( !

Anyone out there like this x

Well, it has been just about 8 weeks since I stopped taking birth control.  The first month was hell, and the last month has been getting better and better.  Some things that have worked for me are bikram yoga to sweat out all the toxins, chiropractic, my chiropractor also gave me some supplements (symplex F is one that is supposed to help hormones), and last week I went and had accupuncture and she also gave me some herbs to take 3x/day to help with my mood.  She also recommended yoga, stetching or light cardio for at least 10 minutes a day to get circulation.  I still don't feel 100%, but I'm getting there and feel confident in saying it will all be worth it in the end.  Birth control gave me terrible anxiety, and other than my occasional negative thoughts about my life, my anxiety is actually much much better. 

JammyDodgers--Don't feel too bad about your setback. I found during the months I was healing, that while I did often see patterns in my mood, there were times it was random. For example, I would feel the usual PMS, but then I also sometimes felt terrible toward the end of my period too, which doesn't make much sense, but it happened. So, while seeking out patterns in your mood is helpful, don't feel bad if even those are inconsistent.



As for the pregnancy worries. My worries must have been stemming from the usual PMS, because I feel great right now. I'm guessing that I might worry about that during PMS for several months, until I get over those negative memories a bit more. Though I'm healed, PMS is still a weird time for me because I remember how it used to be and worry that all of it will return. It hasn't, and I think that when I've spent more time with my "old self", I'll start to forget some of those random worries about returning to that terrible place.



Maybe you should check your feelings about pregnancy on a good day and see how it goes. Sometimes all it takes is one good day to remind yourself that you will live a normal life again :)

Hey ladies. Sorry I haven't responded to anyone but I was away for the weekend with my boyfriend. I have to say... I had a wonderful weekend. 99.9% anxiety free. I felt the love and I was just so happy. It's the best I felt in months. This morning, I woke up slightly anxious. I think I get situational anxiety a lot. I usually wake up anxious before work and so I was just automatically anxious this morning out of habit. My mood took a turn for the worst when I had commuting problems. I take the train to NYC for work every morning and the trains were messed up this morning so I'll be late to work. I've always been cranky about things like this but post-pill, I am RAGING. It literally turned my whole mood upside down. Ever since birth control, things just bother me way more than normal and the worst part is that it's harder to pull myself out of these moods since the pill. I guess I just have to let it pass. I *do* improve a little each month and weekends like this one prove that normalcy is buried somewhere inside of me... And my love for my boyfriend is buried inside of me too.

As for the sex thing, I just can't really enjoy it lately because over the last few months, it's slightly painful. The only example I can give is that it feels like it would if I hadn't had sex for awhile. But that's not the case. It's not excrutiating, it's just annoying. I read that it can be a sign of hormonal imbalance. Yet another symptom, haha. It seriously blows my mind what this pill has done to us and how powerful hormones are. We just have to keep hanging in there and remembering that it's not real and that it'll pass.

I read a book called "Brain Lock" and I'm trying to follow it's suggestions. When you get a negative thought, you are supposed to do 4 steps: Relabel, rearttribute, refocus and revalue. So long story made short, whenever possible, when I get one of these negative thoughts about my relationship, I immediately label it as anxiety and I refocus my attention on something else. Lately, I refocus on something happy in terms of my relationship. We're moving in together in the winter so I'll go online and browse for stuff to buy for our apartment. Or if I'm really down, I'll look up wedding stuff since we're always talking about getting married. So I'll look up dresses and think about how I'd wear my hair or do my makeup. They're nice distractions and they really help.

Does anyone have any remedies that help them? I think positive things like that would be good to share. I can't stress how much vitamins help me. I take a b-complex in the morning, a multivitamin in the afternoon, and evening primrose oil at night. And I'm reading a wonderful book: "The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook." It's like getting therapy without going to the doctor. I'm also in therapy which has helped. But I think the biggest healer so far has been time. That's all we really need. We just have to let it pass.