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I had a friend several years ago that I got along with okay. We weren't the best of friends (because we had so little in common) but our husbands were good friends so, by default, we were friends. About 5 years ago there was a huge issue in her marriage and she basically dropped off the face of the earth and our friendship really took a turn for the worse.

Things got resolved in her marriage and about 1 1/2 years ago she decided to "re-appear." We worked out our friendship to the point where we were spending a little time with each other and beginning to build our friendship again and then they decided to move to GA. In a way I was kinda happy because I felt I was putting too much effort into our friendship and this move would give me a "way out" of it easily.

She has been in GA for a little over a year now and she is now making me feel "guilty" for not keeping in touch, not sending photos (on demand, I might add) of Celeste every couple of days, etc. I really feel like I am having to put too much effort into this friendship and, to be honest, I'm not even sure if I want to be friends anymore (even though that sounds extremely childish to say).

Have any of you had friendships turn sour to the point where you just don't want to be friends anymore?


First all, I'm sorry to hear about your friendship. It sounds like she is desperate to feel she has successful friendships so she is trying really really hard. (Pushing it, really)

Yes--I've had friendships do this. I see it that it was my fault, too--my most recent one is a friend hired me to work with her but she had some power issues and has really treated me badly.

Out I go.


yes. and i'm still horribly bitter about it (them.. rather).

but - i have learned this: anyone who only calls you when they want something, isn't your friend.

and - you can really do a good evaluation of the friendship of whether or not the other person ever calls, ever offers to drive, offers to pay, has you over, says "i have to see what comes up first" (re: other plans), etc. etc. etc...

a few former friends of mine are aptly summed up by the phrase "cute without the 'e' (you're off the team)"