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hi to all, ive never posted on a forum before but i am looking for opinions, my 4 children are 22, 20, 19 and 17. i have been in a long distance relationship with a wonderful man for 2 years. i raised my children by myself as their father just left and not bothered with them. my partner has a great job and owns his own property whereas im unemployed and living in a private rent, job opportunites are better where my partner is, and i have the chance to finally be happy with a wonderful man, however i feel desperatley guilty about wanting to move in with my partner. my adult children all live at home and none of them want to move with me as they have friends etc in our home town. they cannot afford to get their own places and my youngest refuses point blank to move with me. 

i know that legally i am not responsible for the elder 3 but morally it feels wrong to leave them. so as it is now my partner and i are finding it very difficult being apart, its only 60 miles and we both drive but i just feel that i should always be there for my children.

what do others think?

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Hi there(: it sounds like your in a hard position trying to make the right decision for you and your teenagers. As you said they are grown, they need to get jobs & there old enough and capable enough to fend for themselves they can't rely on you to look after them for ever. A mother will always worry about her children no matter how old they are. I suggest you decide to do whats best for you! One day your children will realize. You have done a lot for them the least they could do is let you be happy. . So I would say go for it. Move in with your boyfriend maybe give it a trial? In the end, its your happiness that matters. GOOD LUCK

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Hi there(: it sounds like your in a hard position trying to make the right decision for you and your teenagers. As you said they are grown, they need to get jobs & there old enough and capable enough to fend for themselves they can't rely on you to look after them for ever. A mother will always worry about her children no matter how old they are. I suggest you decide to do whats best for you! One day your children will realize. You have done a lot for them the least they could do is let you be happy. . So I would say go for it. Move in with your boyfriend maybe give it a trial? In the end, its your happiness that matters. GOOD LUCK


thankyou so much for your very kind reply and yes i think you are right i will always worry about them no matter how old they are. i think i fear them somehow resenting me for not being on the doorstep, however i am at the end of a phone and only an hour away. so once again thankyou.
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