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I am married (12 years together) and we have been trying for a baby for over a year. It's become stressful and has put a lot of pressure on us as a couple. I have started having an affair with a guy in work. I don't want any comments about the fact that I'm married and shouldn't be sleeping around, I get that and know I'm a total sh*t. My question is this. It's my fertile days, I had sex with my husband Saturday and then had sex with my other fella on Sunday. We were both a little tipsy and even though he had condoms he didn't use them and pulled out (twice!). He has asked me to get the morning after pill but what if this is the month my husbands little guys succeeded? In my head I know I should get the MAP but I'm just wondering what the chances would be that the twice we had sex and he pulled out would result in a pregnancy?


Hi Annie,

If you had sex twice, there would have been sperm in his urethra from the first time that could have gotten into your urethra.

So, there is a chance that it the "other fella's."

The pull out method is also very unreliable.

It could be your husbands or it could the the "other fella's" if you get pregnant.  You'd never really know for sure and would likely always have some doubts.  You'd need a DNA test to confirm.

MAP might be easier than all that.

Afterwards, you and your husband need to see a fertility specialist.  If it has been a year or more without success it needs to be investigated.  Yes, BOTH of you have to go.  40% of fertility problems are the result of the male.

You can expect a full physical including an internal exam.  Your husband can expect a sperm count.

Good luck.  Hope it helps.





I'm not going to comment on the fact of your extra-marital affair I am just going to comment on the pull-out method.

Me and my husband, dated over 10 years and married over 5 and both more in love today than when married.  Anyways, that was our birth control for many years.  We got a bit careless 2 years after marriage and ended up getting pregnant in July of 09 which ended in miscarriage and again Jan. 2010 which my angel is now almost 3.  The pull-out method is pretty reliable as long as the guy is in tune to his body and knows when to pull-out in time and to leave no residue, I never once had a pregnancy scare either.

Hope this answers your questions.  I can't help but say this as I have to, I do hope you and your hubby can get your communication skills together before you have a baby as having a third party in the mix is not going to work well.  Bringing or thinking of bringing a baby into your situation is careless and thoughtless of you as you need to be there 100% for you baby and your husband.  Work on your relationship, please.

Take care and best wishes as you have a lot of thinking to do