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Hello everyone. I am 27 years old girl and I never had a boyfriend. I was seeing some guys. but I never was in the relationship with any of them. The main reason is -  I am scared. I am extremely scared. I was talking to my sister about this and she did some research. She told me that there is a big chance that I am dealing with commitment phobia or relationship anxiety. Do you even know what this is? 

Is this possible? If it is, can you tell me what can I do to fight against it? Tnx a lot!

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You are dealing with serious problem and you haven't asked anyone to help you but your sister? That is a problem, because you are 27 years old and who knows for how long you are dealing with it.

Anyway, I can't tell if you are dealing with commitment phobia or not. You are scared to be with someone.

Look, you should understand that people who feel commitment phobia usually need to cut off their feelings after a certain point of knowing someone as a means of feeling in control and feeling emotionally protected, if you understand what I mean. 

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Hey darling. You need to know that commitment issues in relationships are nothing new in the world of anxiety and depression. But that fear of commitment for some people can be paralyzing and I do believe that this is the thing in your case. And while you won’t find “commitment phobia” in any diagnostic manual, it is a very real experience of anxiety and fear. I can't tell you do you have problem with commitment phobia and relationship anxiety because people who have commitment issues, commitment phobia or relationship anxiety usually have a serious problem in staying in a relationship for the long-term. And since you haven't been in the relationship, I can't tell you more about this...

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Hi guys. Thank you so much for your answers. I don't know, my sister also told me that I generally do have some problem but that is weird for her because I didn't have a boyfriend. A lot of guys from my school were making a fun of me telling me that I am gay, but that is not true. I am just scared. I remember that one boy kissed me almost 7 years ago and I got so scared. I run away from him and of course, he didn't want to say HI to me never again. That is why I don't know what is my problem. And, you are right. I haven't talked to anybody about this. Maybe it is time...

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Commitment phobia is not what is keeping you away from having a relationship, it can only make it harder for you to maintain a relationship.

Take me for example, I am suffering from commitment phobia, I am 25 years old and I never had a longer relationship than 6 months (and the longest one before that one was 2 months). 

What happens is that a person is so scared of commitment that it eventually just leaves his or her partner, or it becomes mean to her or his partner until he or she decides to leave them instead. It's pretty hard.

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Think of your fear as of a challenge. It is there for you to overcome it and you should do your best to overcome it then.

You certainly have someone who you like, am I not right? Why not go ahead and try something with this person and see how it goes? You need to give it a shot before you can say that you are bad at it or that you are afraid of it. You cannot be afraid of something when you don't even know how that something looks like. Give it a shot and see what is going to happen.
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I am not sure if this is commitment phobia or not, I think about commitment phobia in a bit different way so I am sceptical about you suffering from commitment phobia. I think that you just have an irrational fear that is not really a phobia, but you are simply scared of how bad everything might turn out or how you would do bad in a relationship because you never tried it before and that's it. My advice to you would be to simply try it (not with anyone, of course, find someone you like) and then you will see if you are suffering from this disorder.

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