Don't let the Valentine's Day atmosphere ruin your mood if you're single. If you're on your own, you have a whole lot to celebrate. Here's why.
The chocolate hearts, romantic teddy bears, rose baskets, special cards, and heart-shaped necklaces have been in the stores for weeks already, and you haven't been able to browse the web in peace because adverts for romantic gifts and dinners are everywhere. Don't even think about hopping over to Amazon, because you'll be bombarded by suggestions to buy stuff for your (non-existent) partner or crush.
It's that time of the year again. The ultimate couples' holiday has arrived. Holidays always have the tendency to bring a sense of togetherness that can make anyone who is left out feel lonely, but Valentine's Day is exceptionally irritating if you are single.
Some singles can't stand Valentine's Day because they would prefer to be coupled, while others are perfectly comfortable with their status and have a hard time dealing with the pity party or blind dates others try to create for them.
Surviving Valentine's Day can be tough if you're single — happily or reluctantly. But dump the guilt, have the whole box of chocolates to yourself, and celebrate your singledom.
Being Single Rocks
Valentine's Day isn't the only holiday on February the 14th. You have a perfect alternative in the humorous Singles Appreciation Day, which reminds you that being single doesn't mean you're broken but does mean you don't have to be broke. There is certainly something romantic about a day that celebrates love between partners, but let's be honest and admit that Valentine's Day is more about consumerism than romance.
Will your other half be offended if you don't show love to your credit card company this February? Not if you don't have one.
You can just forget about Valentine's Day altogether, but if you don't like the thought of that, embrace the consumerism and throw a singles' party instead. Those people who would really like to meet "the one" (or just have some fun) can set up a blind-date type party on this day — and who knows, Valentine's Day just might become your anniversary date in the future.
Singles who don't mind being single or who actually really love it can get together with other happily unpartnered folks, and celebrate not having a partner. Because being single rocks, if you love it. You can live your life on your own terms and don't get hampered by another person's opinions and habits all the time.
Being single can certainly be something to celebrate, and here's why.
No 'Bonus' Relationships
When you get together with the man or woman of your dreams, you tend to get a ton of unwanted "bonus" relationships for free. Singles don't have to worry about an over-critical mother-in-law, their partner's alcoholic grandfather, or that friend who suspiciously seems to be just a little more than a friend.
Dealing with the people who are in your own life involuntarily is quite enough, isn't it? You have your own family, coworkers, and neighbors, but you don't need to have a whole bunch of your partner's toxic and unpleasant people around if you are single. Mind you, some people hide their friends and relatives from the person they are in a relationship with altogether, and that is a whole other kind of problematic.
When you are single, you have more control over who to include in your life, and fewer worries about people who aren't.
Celebrate Your Singledom
No Nagging And Being Nagged
Remember that dirty-sock cliché? Singles don't have a a partner to nag about those dirty socks on the bedroom floor, but they don't get whined at for leaving their own there either. And you know what? After all those gifts, a romantic dinner, and some wine, coupled people's partners are going to expect some extra-special Valentine's Day sex. And they may not feel like that at all.
The advantages of being single go beyond being able to live in a messy house if you want to. Nobody will be nagging at you to get undressed, and you don't have to invent a headache. Meanwhile, if you do feel like "it", you have to freedom to choose anyone you want for that one night.
You're In Good Company
Nearly half of all American adults are now single. That comes to 100 million people, the highest figure ever! Though some (coupled!) people will still try to make you feel bad for being on your own, the stigma attached to being a single is rapidly disappearing. Did you know that 61 percent of singles never walked down the aisle? Back in 1960, only 15 percent of the American population remained unmarried. How many people in the married majority actively wanted this kind of life, and how many went along with it because everyone expected them to?
The 2010 census shows that married couples now account for less than 50 percent of households, and 28 percent never got hitched. Being in an unappreciated minority can sure make you feel bad, but guess what? If you're single, you are no longer an exception. You're in good company, and share your status with literally millions of other people.
The Freedom To Be Who You Are
Being married or partnered can offer a lot of satisfaction. You get to share all your joys, fears, worries and mood swings with someone who committed to being with you no matter what. When you're part of a couple, you lose some of your individuality as you merge into a part of a whole.
That can be a good thing, but also an unfortunate one. You can't just ignore your partner when he says he wants to move to the country, or when she says she wants to send your kids to an obscure private school, or when he thinks you should lose some weight, or when she thinks you should sell that car.
Singles get to make their important decisions all by themselves, as well as the mundane ones.
You can move for your job, or stay put. You can make that healthy dinner, or have Chinese takeout yet again. You can go to that movie with friends, or just spend time in front of the TV. You get to decide how much or how little interaction you want with other humans, without having to take your partner's wishes into account.
You get to be as crazy or sane as you want when you are single. You get to be you. Just as importantly, you don't have to feel frustrated with another person's bad habits. You have no personal mission to "improve" another person.
Singles who are unhappily on their own have a whole lot to look forward to this year. You won't find that exciting, in-love, "everything is new" feeling with someone you've been married to for 20 years — but you will get to experience it. And singles who are ecstatic to have the liberties that come with being alone can enjoy February the 14th in peace.
Above all, singles won't have to feel guilty about not going into debt (or at least spending more than they want to) on stupid knick-knacks that are meant to convey love.
- Photo courtesy of Marius Brede by Flickr : www.flickr.com/photos/miles92/5478244309/
- Photo courtesy of Alejandro Forero Cuervo by Flickr : www.flickr.com/photos/aforero/2916806156/
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