all my life i've been incredibly insecure about my body, image, what people think of me, and have had low self esteem. i've always had terrible anxiety around girls. every time i've had a sexual encounter something has gone wrong, i've gotten stage fright or lost erection (i've been drunk or high every time maybe worth noting). these experiences caused me to avoid dating/seeing girls for years even though i had wanted girls all my life. now it has gotten to the point where i'm so lonely, miserable and depressed that i want a deep meaningful relationship but again i am very akward and anxious around women. major drug abuse and drinking has made my anxiety way worse and i'm pretty much constantly depressed or anxious about something.... it's gotten so bad that for a period of time i became obsessed with the size of my penis constantly 'checking' how big it was literally every 5 minutes and judging whether or not it was acceptable lol.... and more recently i developed HOCD where i get all these intrusive thoughts about being a fag and it's REALLY worrying me and confusing me because all my life i've been craving women and never looked at men in a sexual way. anyways, wtf do i do? depressed, anxiety, self-esteem problems.... wtf is wrong with me should i see a doctor
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