i'm to embarrassed to talk about it in person

Im 17and my boyfriend is 17 turing 18.he came round my friends house with his other friend just to chill but then my friend & his friend started kissing so it was really uncomfortable so we moved to her room we started talking about life then family and then SEX i didn't really want to talk about it because i knew where it was gonna and up so he started to kiss my neck & shoulders it did feel good but then i felt his hand slip into my bra then into my underwear i was wearing a skirt so it made it easy i told him to stop because i wasn't ready he told me this will make us closer and that he loves me i told him that if he loves me why can't he wait a little longer he told me that i make him turned on every time im with him i told him i dont he undid my bra and started to finger me at first i thought that it wont get any further but it did he stuck his P**** in me it hurt like hell i was crying non stop i told him to stop i was thinking to myself why aint he stopping after 20 minutes he stopped and was like it wasn't that bad was it i ran to the bathroom and cried i heard a knock on the door so i opened it and he said that he didn't mean it he loves and he wished that he could take it back he hugged me and told me to forgive him but i just said yes sure inside i felt like dying because i didn't know what to do tell someone or not i'm to embarrassed to talk about it in person so please give me some advice thanks