Hey : )
My friend has asked me to teach her how to have an orgasm and about sex. Shes 21 years old and has never had sex, an orgasm or touched herself before. I'm a nice, 22 year old guy whos experienced in sex (not a male sex driven ahole!). We share a close friendship and im happy to help out.
I've been looking up and researching how best to go about it. The plan is after watching an adult movie (not a cheesy porno lol) to introduce her to touching and contact and then work our way through clit stimulation, orgasms and fingering working up slowly (all ok'ed by her). I have come across a few questions tho that i was hoping someone here could help answer...
As she is a virgin i would like to find out more about her hymen. I've looked it up and understand what it is and that it may bleed but I'm a bit nervous about hurting her (this is when we get round to fingering which shes also asked for). Is there a certain way to go about doing it? and will it happen naturally or will i have to break it? (sounds harsh?) : )
Shes not sure if shes felt turned on before and what turns her on but she says she "feels things change" downstairs when she watches sex scenes in movies. Is there a good way to help her find out what gets her going?
Any advice would be really helpful! thank you!!
Cheers,
Ray
My friend has asked me to teach her how to have an orgasm and about sex. Shes 21 years old and has never had sex, an orgasm or touched herself before. I'm a nice, 22 year old guy whos experienced in sex (not a male sex driven ahole!). We share a close friendship and im happy to help out.
I've been looking up and researching how best to go about it. The plan is after watching an adult movie (not a cheesy porno lol) to introduce her to touching and contact and then work our way through clit stimulation, orgasms and fingering working up slowly (all ok'ed by her). I have come across a few questions tho that i was hoping someone here could help answer...
As she is a virgin i would like to find out more about her hymen. I've looked it up and understand what it is and that it may bleed but I'm a bit nervous about hurting her (this is when we get round to fingering which shes also asked for). Is there a certain way to go about doing it? and will it happen naturally or will i have to break it? (sounds harsh?) : )
Shes not sure if shes felt turned on before and what turns her on but she says she "feels things change" downstairs when she watches sex scenes in movies. Is there a good way to help her find out what gets her going?
Any advice would be really helpful! thank you!!
Cheers,
Ray
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You're an unusually good friend to be thinking this through so well before acting. Many guys would be lining up at her door, only too happy to "break her in."
First, she sounds like she has had some arousal, but may lack confidence.
You could simply agree to an evening of massage without going any further.
Soft lights, soft music, warm massage oil and pleasant surroundings can do wonders for turning a girl on.
You two might both read "Sex for One " by Bette Dotson or "Getting the Love you Want". Other good books include "The Joy of Sex" by Alex Comfort and "The Guide to Getting it On" by Paul Joandes (goofy foot press).
I especially like the last one, as it's light hearted, but hits all the serious points along the way. Plus it's got great cartoon drawings to teach and illustrate.
As for the hymen, well, it's my understanding that it tends to "give way" when stressed from penetration. It's entirely possible that this woman has already ruptured or torn her hymen from sports, horsemanship, or other strenuous activities. But I've not heard of it being torn by fingering, unless the fingering is incredibly rough and insensitive!
Hope this has helped.
Any ladies want to chime in here?
First, she sounds like she has had some arousal, but may lack confidence.
You could simply agree to an evening of massage without going any further.
Soft lights, soft music, warm massage oil and pleasant surroundings can do wonders for turning a girl on.
You two might both read "Sex for One " by Bette Dotson or "Getting the Love you Want". Other good books include "The Joy of Sex" by Alex Comfort and "The Guide to Getting it On" by Paul Joandes (goofy foot press).
I especially like the last one, as it's light hearted, but hits all the serious points along the way. Plus it's got great cartoon drawings to teach and illustrate.
As for the hymen, well, it's my understanding that it tends to "give way" when stressed from penetration. It's entirely possible that this woman has already ruptured or torn her hymen from sports, horsemanship, or other strenuous activities. But I've not heard of it being torn by fingering, unless the fingering is incredibly rough and insensitive!
Hope this has helped.
Any ladies want to chime in here?
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You two may be the best of friends but do you want to to be the one to take her virginity? Show her everything that goes along with it but if i were her, i think i would want to save my virginity for that special man that may come into her life.
Geez i don't know, do girls still want to retain their virginity for that "special someone" or is that to old fashioned these days?
But who knows, maybe you will end up being her Knight in shining armour!!
Geez i don't know, do girls still want to retain their virginity for that "special someone" or is that to old fashioned these days?
But who knows, maybe you will end up being her Knight in shining armour!!
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Sounds like a good friend to take things slow, but he advised if she hasnt had any serious relationships that have lead up to this that maybe she will create a special attachment to you as you were her "first"... I know My boyfriend of 2 yrs was my first and i cant imagine being with anyone else but him and weve formed a special connection together. I would be a little leary of this unless both of you agree this is just between friends and know it wont lead to more unless you want it to.
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I would like to echo this concern.
Are you sure you want to risk this?
Maybe yes, maybe no... it's alright to not be sure yet.
But an intimacy of this nature can easily form a dependancy... and it will be something you will always share... and never be able to truly put out of your mind.
After 35 years, I still remember my "first" and the bittersweet pain associated with our floundering. That's a heavy weight to have, all these years later.
Use caution as you make your decisions.
Are you sure you want to risk this?
Maybe yes, maybe no... it's alright to not be sure yet.
But an intimacy of this nature can easily form a dependancy... and it will be something you will always share... and never be able to truly put out of your mind.
After 35 years, I still remember my "first" and the bittersweet pain associated with our floundering. That's a heavy weight to have, all these years later.
Use caution as you make your decisions.
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lo folks
cheers for the replys and the imformation.
@Kirk Thank you! lol yes thats the problem with most men these days. I think thats one of the reasons she didnt want to get involved. Were good people and dont like being used lol.
@bbfeet9 Depends what you class as her virginty. If she does decide to try sex, which wont be for a while yet, i doubt it will be with me lol. I expect she will be happy with learning how to masterbate and have an orgasm : )
yes we've both talked about how it might effect us so were going to try once and see how we feel. Yeah i have thought about what might happen if she gets a bit attached. we've known each other long enough and were adult enough to be able to know where to draw the line. Heh and in the end she's swayed more towards the ladies than the gents...im just the helper ^^
anyways cheers for all the advice folks! really useful! Im sure if we do do this ill have more questions so ill come back :-)
laters
Ray
cheers for the replys and the imformation.
@Kirk Thank you! lol yes thats the problem with most men these days. I think thats one of the reasons she didnt want to get involved. Were good people and dont like being used lol.
@bbfeet9 Depends what you class as her virginty. If she does decide to try sex, which wont be for a while yet, i doubt it will be with me lol. I expect she will be happy with learning how to masterbate and have an orgasm : )
yes we've both talked about how it might effect us so were going to try once and see how we feel. Yeah i have thought about what might happen if she gets a bit attached. we've known each other long enough and were adult enough to be able to know where to draw the line. Heh and in the end she's swayed more towards the ladies than the gents...im just the helper ^^
anyways cheers for all the advice folks! really useful! Im sure if we do do this ill have more questions so ill come back :-)
laters
Ray
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