Hello,
I am having problems maintaining while sexual intercourse and I don’t know why. I don’t have a problem actually getting the erection. Its just as soon as I insert my penis in her vagina, my penis dies. She is however able to masturbate me. Its quite frustrating.
I suppose it could be due to many things. Maybe even losing my virginity late. The first time I attempted to have sex., I was 18. I was also piss drunk. So I assumed that I was having problems maintaining an erection was because of the alcohol level in my blood. This was also with a women that I met there and then, and never really hooked up with again.
The second time was with my girlfriend, I had been drinking – and I started having sex, but then my penis died during intercourse. But later on during the night it came back to life and we managed to finish the sexual intercourse.
The next time I had sex with her though, my penis died and came back to life but then also died when I tried reinserting it. Although she was fully able to masturbate it – and the penis would stay erect.
So I am wondering what it could be – could it be me just being shy?
Thanks for reading my post – open for any feedback
- John
I am having problems maintaining while sexual intercourse and I don’t know why. I don’t have a problem actually getting the erection. Its just as soon as I insert my penis in her vagina, my penis dies. She is however able to masturbate me. Its quite frustrating.
I suppose it could be due to many things. Maybe even losing my virginity late. The first time I attempted to have sex., I was 18. I was also piss drunk. So I assumed that I was having problems maintaining an erection was because of the alcohol level in my blood. This was also with a women that I met there and then, and never really hooked up with again.
The second time was with my girlfriend, I had been drinking – and I started having sex, but then my penis died during intercourse. But later on during the night it came back to life and we managed to finish the sexual intercourse.
The next time I had sex with her though, my penis died and came back to life but then also died when I tried reinserting it. Although she was fully able to masturbate it – and the penis would stay erect.
So I am wondering what it could be – could it be me just being shy?
Thanks for reading my post – open for any feedback
- John
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Hey John - guess what? That's VERY common. Seems weird to you, but to a therapist, this is a VERY clear sign.
I have had it too - SO MANY guys have. It usually means something mental - it's not a physical problem. Even though you get not physical response - that's after you've been fine with it. But when things get "serious" and you're inside her, that actually MEANS a lot to you (and us). It's not "just sex" (the physical part). It's a mental closeness, makes you act subconciously; things stop working without your permission - your body is saying "I'm not ready to be this close to this person". Many times, it's not THEM that you're afraid of - you may REALLY love them and want to be with them as close as you can.
It can easily be an underlying thing from your past. Sometimes you won't even know it's there - you never had to get SO CLOSE to someone, and it didn't come up before. It sounds like physically you're fine, and you need to try talking to someone who knows about this stuff. As I said, it's pretty normal response, but something you'll want to fix, eh? You can, but you have to have outside help on this - they can show you ways and ideas to make it MUCH better!
I have had it too - SO MANY guys have. It usually means something mental - it's not a physical problem. Even though you get not physical response - that's after you've been fine with it. But when things get "serious" and you're inside her, that actually MEANS a lot to you (and us). It's not "just sex" (the physical part). It's a mental closeness, makes you act subconciously; things stop working without your permission - your body is saying "I'm not ready to be this close to this person". Many times, it's not THEM that you're afraid of - you may REALLY love them and want to be with them as close as you can.
It can easily be an underlying thing from your past. Sometimes you won't even know it's there - you never had to get SO CLOSE to someone, and it didn't come up before. It sounds like physically you're fine, and you need to try talking to someone who knows about this stuff. As I said, it's pretty normal response, but something you'll want to fix, eh? You can, but you have to have outside help on this - they can show you ways and ideas to make it MUCH better!
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