About a month ago I went on my second trip of roughly 2-2.5 grams. My first trip I only took 1 gram and nothing really happened so I decided to bump up the dosage. The (second) trip lasted 5-6 hours and it was all fun and games until the last hour I started remembering something that happened in my past that made me depressed and I began having a mental breakdown. Luckily I had friends there to calm me down.So I wake up the next day and ever since then I feel like I haven't felt the same. I feel really fatiqued and tired all the time and sometimes even more depressed than I am as I have moderate depression as well as Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. A lot of people I know that have had a lot of experience with mushrooms told me in must be all in my head because they said the mushrooms would be out of my system within several days. I went on a third trip eight days ago to see if maybe doing it again would reverse how I felt but I still don't feel the same and there are days when I feel like I'm just going through the motions and am losing interest in things and I'm tired. So here are a few questions I have:1) Are the shrooms possibly still having an effect on me and are they still in my system? If so, is there any way to detox them?2) Is is possible that the shrooms aren't still in my system but because of the bad trip towards the end some sort of psychological effect is going on? Any way to fix that?3) If it's really all in my head how do I stop thinking it's the shrooms and get my life back to normal? I really want to avoid trying these again because I really don't think they're good for me after having a couple trips. As mentioned I have OCD and Depression and I don't introducing something new to my brain is a good idea. Thanks
OH and these are shrooms by the way.
It's possible that this is a physiological effect, and it's possible that it is a psychological one. Sounds to me like the latter.
Psychedelics are strange creatures. Sometimes they will make you feel like you understand everything, and sometimes they will make you feel like you don't understand anything. It's not as simple as being a "good" or a "bad" experience.
It tends to be the worst experiences in our lives which produce the most profound insights.
Mushrooms are not something to be taken lightly. Compared to other psychedelics, they can be somewhat hostile. They produce less gaiety and more serious introspection. It's entirely normal to feel like c**p after you take them, because there are things that you can see that you've never noticed before, and feelings that you now understand are just as real as anything else.
As Hume and the empiricists demonstrated to great effect, certain cognitive phenomena cannot be analytically justified. The perception of time is one of these, and when you lose it, you cannot easily work your way back to it using logic. One time, when I ate mushrooms, I felt like I spent an infinite amount of time staring at my clock and waiting for it to move. This is absurd and obviously impossible. However, at the time, and for some time afterward, the experience remained poignant and it brought me down quite a bit. Eventually, though, I realized that being 'stuck in eternity' was just a bunch of garbage my panicked mind threw together in a drug-induced absence of external rules.
It's possible to blame drugs for some psychological and physical illness, but it sounds to me like you have noticed something about yourself or your life that you didn't necessarily want to notice. Nothing can ever be unseen - you're going to have to work to integrate that knowledge into the way you live your life, and if you find something loathsome, you're going to have to either fix it or work around it.
Something to remember, however, is that something you 'realize' when you're on a psychedelic is just as likely to be true as false. They don't just pick radio waves out of the air, they take thoughts that were already in your mind and amplify them. Proceeding from invalid axioms usually leads to invalid conclusions, especially if done with flawed logic. It's important to take epiphanies with a grain of salt.
Another thing to remember is that people have been eating mushrooms for thousands of years. Almost all of them have considered it a religious experience, and something to be taken extremely seriously. They often talk about spirits or forces which can become extremely dangerous if provoked. There's a reason for this. I don't believe in ghosts or spirits or anything like that, but I do believe in the power of the human mind, and there is plenty of room in there for proverbial demons without invoking the supernatural. While they can sometimes be defeated, it requires great effort from even the bravest, and nobody should feel bad about becoming exhausted in such a battle.