Left Home For One Month to Attempt Detox

I am fifty years old and started smoking pot about twelve years ago.  I started out smoking occasionally but it soon increased to two or three hits every evening before bed or sex.  I enjoyed the lack of sexual inhibition, the introspection, relaxation and general feeling that nothing and nobody could bug me when I was stoned.  But as a sufferer of depression and anxiety I soon realized that smoking weed was exacerbating those things.  When I was sober I started to feel dull, unenthusiastic and unmotivated.  I lost my ambition and drive and my social life virtually disappeared as I just didn't want to go out anywhere.  If I did go out I would leave early so that I could get home to smoke up and resume my state of 'bliss'.  I lost interest in sex completely and have not have any sexual relations in over five years.  I still masturbate occasionally to keep things operating down there but I can only achieve that if I get high and watch porn.  I worry constantly about middle age and the encroaching years leading us all toward death and when I'm stoned in bed at night I invariably dwell on the fear of death and how it might happen to me.  I have tried to stop smoking on several occasions but in every case was too weak to resist another puff to alleviate the withdrawal anxiety.  My home is now synonymous with smoking pot every evening and so the only way i can abstain is to go away somewhere; somewhere where there is no access to the drug.  I Am British but live in the US so I have just embarked on a month long detox by coming back to the UK where I can avoid weed with no pre-established routines or associations to remind me that my daily routine is disrupted.  It is only Day Five but I feel pretty good so far.  Jet-lag has many similar symptoms but I have been sleeping with the aid of an Ambien every night and I feel fine.  The vivid dreams have just started to return (I always have these episodic dreams that seem to last all night long whenever I abstain for more than a few days) and I actually embrace them as a sign that things are beginning to happen.  I had cold night sweats for the first two nights but apart from that I seem to be doing OK for now.  The hardest part for me will be my return to the US where my house represents a life that has become totally buoyed-up by pot and I find it hard to believe that I will have the willpower to go back there without a desperate need to fill a bowl on the very first night.  The last time I returned home after a fortnight in the UK I took two huge drags on the bong and sent myself into a kind of hyper delirium with violent shivering fits that kept me awake all night    

i've never had the opportunity to stop cold turkey for an entire month so this is quite an experiment for me.  I'm finding it hard to believe that, even after a month, I will be able to resist the mind numbing effects when i back at work and coping with day-to-day activities.  I am a writer and I haven't produced a book in over six years.  My mind is full of self-doubt and my daily cry seems to be 'what's the point of it?'.  It's relatively easy to stop thinking about it when you are on holiday, travelling around with friends and family and not being exposed to the drug but what about when I get back to my own home?