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Hi. I have some questions and I would like a quick answer because I am very worried about my son’s health. For always, my son has been a bit quiet and calm child. I wouldn’t say that he suffered from some type of social disorder, but now- I'm not so sure what to think. He’s now 10 years old and I thought maybe this problem with social anxiety in children under 10 will disappear when he starts with school but I was wrong. He is not talking with anyone and has no friends what so ever. He is sitting all day long in his room. Please if anyone knows how to overcome these problems- contact me! Worried mother.

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You are right- Anxiety disorders can occur in all ages.
What you have described looks like a classic Social Anxiety Disorder in kids. Your son isn’t only kid with this disorder because this disorder is very common among adults and among the kids also. Nobody knows exactly what causes anxiety disorders but some say that it is connected with heredity.
The disorder is characterized by a marked and persistent fear of social or performance situations in which embarrassment may occur.
You must understand that sometimes professional help may be necessary because kids with social anxiety are at a higher risk for developing depression, alcoholism and even thoughts of suicide.
But you must keep your faith because there are several ways to overcome these problems through a combination of various therapies, medications and support groups for parents.

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O, and i thought i was the only one, Im 15, and sometimes i dont like talking to people, i prefer, working on my own, i like to be alone, but this is cause of past "experienceses", ( yeah im only 15 and usualy teens dont get "experience" cause were dumb), I just dont know how to "react". People talk to me and stuff but i hardly do anything, for example, my friend tells me hi, i either, say hi in a "mumbling" voice, or just say nothing at all, Im not sure why? I feel "insecure" about my self or something, i care what ether people think to much, i guess, My parents are divorced, i dont fit in with any of my cousins or aunts, so i feel "alone" most of the time, and i spend most of the time on the computer like a mudcrab, I may know what hes going threw, I hardly ever talk to any of my family, I spend more time with one friend who knows how it feels....................... But dont let it get to him because, He could turn out to be one of those "goth kids" and think about drugs, and suicide, and lots of bad things, I did, and i still think about all those things, I failed my freshman year because i skipped school and just went home and locked my self in my room, Gosh i need help to o.O
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hey my name is Andrea and i am 15 years old. i battle severe depression. i am a "goth" kid but im not a bad person. i try to express myself in black because it makes me feel secure with myself. i was dumped my my boyfriend jason who i was with for two years and after he left i just "crashed and burned." i stopped sleeping regular, i couldn't stay asleep if i even got there. i was never hungry, so within twenty one days i lost about seventeen to twenty pounds. i can't take it anymore. i tried paxil but that made me worse. i tried talking to jason but he didn't care. i just keep loosing weight even though i try to eat and eat. i just had a really hard life, and i need some advice or something to keep my alive, and well. :-(
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Andrea - You are in a tough spot, and, no doubt, very sad. I'm betting that it's hard to see the love you have in your life, but it is there. Do not apologize for your choice in Goth... you are beautiful the way you are... and your 'look' will change with time, as it does for everyone. I encourage you to talk to your parents. For the record... parents are very thick at times... do not assume they know the extent of your pain. Parents also like to assume that the pain of teen love is not 'real'... or that it is somehow less. This is not true - your pain is as real and deeply painful as any pain experienced. I know it may be difficult... but do what it takes to make them understand how hurt you are. Parents love can come out in many forms... but they do love you. You have the right to demand help from them... and maybe it's time to not take 'no' for an answer. I am proud of you for asking for help - that takes courage and strength.

Making your parents seeing where you are and helping you is a good next step. Seeing a therapist is also a must - first visits can be awkward and seem very futile. But very soon you will find that just the event of sharing will help... and then, if you let them, the therapist will provide good help. It's what they do. (... for the record... I am not a therapist, but have been through many myself).
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Hey im larissa and i am 14 years old i just started grade nine , i was fine then one morning i woke up dizzy and nasious i told my mom i wasent feeling good but she made me go i couldent consentrate that day, I have missed 2 months of school and i havent hung out either i miss my friends:(. I have been to the doctors several times but they keep on telling me it is Vertigo i went to a specialest 5 days ago and he said it was anxidy disorder i dont know if i got it from worrying about Vertigo but I am really scared i cant stop worrying am i gunna have this my whole life, am i going blind,what if i loose control and commit suicide,am i becoming handycap,how am i gunna go to school,what will my friend think will they make it worse. im so depressed i never used to be i never used to worry this much ? It just came outta know were :'( i still kinda have a little faith but i dont think i will ever be the same :'(
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lol dont knwo if im deppressed or what all this stress im getting is probly from my dad having an affair and all. But after he did i feel as if the world is on my back and i always think of suaside but i try to think why i must not liek my brothers need my and i still have my mum. But being 15 dosent help alot. I liek to play with my brothers but every now and again i need some time to myself to think everthing over. And most of the itme it is at night and this is why i get no sleep XD
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    Hi, my son has severe social anxiety too. He is 16 and has suffered his whole life .
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Im 15 and Im not sure if I suffer from any social anxiety, but if what I feel is a social anxiety then I cover it was laughter, seriously a laugh at everything and its really embarrassing, and I feel really bad when I laugh at funerals and the like. maybe it could be something like that. I have been told that I laugh due to emotions Im uncomfortable with or that I dont know how to react with something thats happened. Iv gotten better....it might not be the same case but maybe your son will too, when I was in primary school I never loked at people when I talked to them....and people teased me about it and I still have the problem from time to time these days too, with some people it just takes longer to settle into society and figure out whats expected of them, in relation to the actions of others.
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:-| oops...my bad, as Iwas sayin' o.O So much stress, so much tension. I think there is a need to chill out a bit and relax.

-MarchesanoMama, don't fret, its hard when your startin out that young by yourself, I know, I was the same way. If the backups not already behind you its hard to harness that confidence at age ten. I was in the fifth grade when my family moved to a new town. Im supa-shy. But the bedroom won't help build that confidence (at least not fo a few more years anyway, ehh ladies). My ma was able to convince me to innact by meetin some other parents and gettin me invited to little birthdays n' stuff. I was pretty dull and uhh...socially inept, and your guy maybe to (I aint sayin he is, jus lit bit shy) but he'll learn and even if he doesn't do it entirely by himself the other kids aint shy, they'll getem in, he won't have a choice, he'll want to, he'll have fun, when it comes down to it, they maybe a little nurvous but shy guys know how to have fun. Give it time, key is no pressure.

-Yo, XinGeh, wassup man. don't think so much, it hurts. If you already don't fit in with everybody (which aint true, we all can relate somehow) then why care what they think. Good to have that one goodbuddy though, its not about who we live life with, but how- how much fun we can have with em'. I also fluckin funked my freshman year. Hey, dude if yer gonna flunk skoo, den get outa da room like MacheMom's boy and mac, fail skool, but not yourself, enjoy life...and don't kill yourself, use yo killa self and sleigh the hunnies. And as for the drugs, don't think about em'... do em' - - -oh yeah, and even Goth's can be sexy, man.

-Andrea... hey cutie! jus playin' - I mean I'm sure your hot though, anyway. Depression's universal, without it ecstacy would have no value (emotion not drug, the drug will always have value-) without yin, no yang. We all crash and burn, the key, especially wit ex's is to make sure we have twice as much good times afta they leave us, he was holdin ya back. And yeah, life is hard, thats why we gotta smooth it silky. As fo the insomnia and lack of apetite... I don't know what dahell Prakzil is, but there be a pretty little plant goes by the name of Mary, that MudaErf grew fo man (and woman alike) to combat both. ;-) Stay sexy. 8-| (and by the way as for the [I am a "goth" kid but im not a bad person]...-Oh, I know you're bad 8)

-Hey JayGAGzo ninewhatever... did you hear her apolo-gilize, cuz I didn't. You should apologize for yo name. Parents aint thick, there thin, and if we remember that then they can't ever tare us, we tare them. (actually, I take that back... Yo Mama's Thick!) Don't waste time tryin' to teach others tounderstand your pain, spend it on adressing the issues causing your pain and fix it (can you say, mary jay), emotional pain is only as real as you let it be, but lighting that plant on fire can actually physically burn baby! I don't know about my parents, but I know God loves me (weed is from the earth, take advantage man -Friday). Therapy is a must, but you don't need to pay some "freudian" old bearded guy to ask you how shiz makes us feel, self-therapize, you know who ya are and who ya wanna be! As fo the freaudian old dude, that stuff aint futile...its fatal. My thera-pissed just pissed me off (and bored me back on drugs). And for the record...I AM A THERAPIST...and how does that make you feel? And off the record... The numba aint 9000... ITS 420!

-hey, Professor Snape, laftas good, especially if its embarrassing. There be a magic, little green harrypothead plant that'll cover anything with laughter! Why let yourself get told by some other know-it-all prickly wicked witch the reason why you laugh. You laugh cause its funny, and you aint gotta look at people your talkin' to specialy if they be ugly. And laugh at funerals, especially funerals...as long as your grateful that you're still alive to laugh. Don't get teased, get made fun of. It's great to be fun! what's this enchanted unicorn-c**p about living in relation to others expectations? live for yourself and expect the world to follow or get out the way.

-Larissa (ooh...a freshwoman), TWO MONTHS! NICE! I got four saturday schools fo cuttin 2 days! don't be miss yer friends, but don't be selfish teach them what you did. If one of my friends had pulled that, I'd be dang PO'd if dey didn't share that little trick, really congrats, your my hero! I am but not worthy. Yeah yo friends are gonna make it worse, they gonna be maaaad. thats what happens when you hoard divine system-cracking knowlege and pull a stunt like, while their suffering in that public juvenile facility while you roam frizzle for TWO MONTHS, dang girl! anywhoo...vertigo? thats like fear a heights er sometin right? If it is, ever hear of aversion therapy, facing the fear, ya just gotta get high , who knows, might take are of the anxiety to? I mean I've never experienced Vertigo (actually I think I did at six flags, some rollercoaster, right?) but whether going blind or becoming handycapped, I don't think suicide would result in the most desired outcome. Remember euphoria cancels depression (and fine, I'll admit it maybe not everyone the world agrees with me on the whole "getting high" thing, but come on, even drugs should be a highher priority then offing yourself -get it- a "higher" priority XD anyway, I get it and I think its hillarious. I'm high right now, and I can honestly say, no Vertigo up here. and By the by, have more than a little faith, otherwise that's hardly the word. Only complete faith, will get us through, and it will, just wait, and keep the faith, even if you don't I will. Someone always will.

-CraigT yeah, yeah! I'm not sure if your depressed, either. In fact, I don't even know you, but please, if the world is on your shoulders, don't drop us, man (and suicide won't help ya hold it up either) cause I'd really rather not go tumblin all willy-nilly through the cosmos until we burn up colliding with some firery star or get sucked up into some blackwhole, at least not yet, I'm really not all suicidal like the rest a ya are, and so please if yur gonna end your self, don't take the rest of us with you, or at least not be. Maybe you gentle put the world down, or give it to yer pops to hold for a while, he sounds like a stand up guy. 15, eh. ya know what helped me think when I was fifteen a few years ago, my girlfriend. She was a lot smarter than I, but what I'm sayin is that, even if it's not gonna be your bro's, mom, or God forbid, your father, you may want t rethink the whole secluded alone thing, especially if its gonna lead you to conclusions like suicide, and like I said I'm not sayin thats not a good idea, just maybe you should get a second opinion. As for the no sleep, the whole female counter-part concept may be a good idea, a second opinion and some good sex always help put me to bed, or at least in better mood. I that failed, a small bowl of some potent hashish would put me out stone cold for the night... and the girl to keep warm. Who knows, she may even agree with you and hold suicide in your best interest, and if your good enought in the sac maybe she'll even be so kind as to put you down for you. Think about it: herb, sex, and suicide; what a date, eh? Three necessities to aid the improvent of life...or at least happily end it.

As for the severly suffering sixteen year-old son, hardships and agony for his entire life...well, what's the problem, mate. Things can only get better right? -what...-wrong! Oh, well then suicide it is.

-And last, but- no, and completely least, TANK...Mr. Classic-hereditary-Social-Anxiety-Disorder. Either you need to get proffesor Snape's wand unlodged from your excruciatingly constipated heineken, or you need pull your head out of the medical text books and actually assert yourself into the real world, where people are are classified by their choices and personality- not some lame vague label distributed off the page of some magazine you were reading to appear intelligable to the attractive woman who sits across from you at the local coffee shop, a magazine, by the way who's author probably does not have a single brain cell left remembering what it was like to be a kid. So thank you for incitefully applying your apprehensive, intuitive brain function and yes, successfully deducing; what was it you had to say: that this psychiatric brain malfunction may cause kids to be experience...shyness and fear of impending embarresment, wow. Is that really a disorder? Cause I call it growing up. Let us examine other of your widom filled contributions; kids like these, like us, may be at higher risk of depression. Show me a teenager without a single ounce of depression and I'll tear from him his deepest insecuriy and put it out in the open, to get teased, outcasted, to learn to cope. Teenage is depression, how'd you figure it out. And thoughts of suicide? My God, it is almost as if you were reading! Reading what all these teens wrote in this forum, dur. Thankyou though for covering those topical possibilities of growing up as a human being as if they weren't already coverded on a personal basis by the actual teens. Really, depression and Suicide, one never would have drwn that conclusion almost as if they went hand-n-hand. As for the supposed "alcoholism", yes regretably its true some of us do turn to that bitter intoxicant, but honestly, who needs beer when you got weed?
-Nah, just messin' with ya- well, sort of. Have fun in parental support groups, though- cause while all the parents and moms are there discussing possible medications for supposed brain disorders and metal illness's, the Daddies will be out cheating on there wives, tearing apart families, and all us kids will be out drowning our mentally impaired sorrowed little heads in alcohol and offing each other, in more ways than one :wink However, you are absolutly right, we must keep our faith.

Peace and Love, this isn't even the forum I was looking for anyway.
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im 16 and im pretty sure i suffer from social anxiety myself....when i was younger i seemed to be alot happier around my family and was always doing somthing either with my friends or family, but when i turned around 12 i noticed i started becoming alot quieter for some reason and stayed in my room alot. i dont really know what caused me to become quieter around people and more shy at school, people think its cuz my brother causes alot of problems at home but idont think so cuz it dosent bother me that much..in the summers i started spending almost all of my time on the computer and talking to people i didnt know in real life, i did this because its alot easier for me to talk on the computer for some reason. well anyway by 8th grade i barely had any friends and started becoming really depressed and cryed almost everyday and thought about suicide alot...i didnt tell my parents i was depressed until a year later and they put me on some depression medicane and took me to a therapist for a while. none of this has really helped much...iv been to 3 therapist and none have made me feel any happier or less shy really ;\ my mom told me i shuld stop taking the medicine and see if i feel any diffrent, so i stoped taking it and i felt the same as when i was taking it..so that didnt help either. iv also been having alot of problems with sleepiness and backpain and i dunno what to do about it, i always feel very tired and i can sleep up to 20 hours a day when im not in school. i just feel like my life is going to hell and no1 can help =[ ijust wish things would get better but idont see how they can really...just wish i wasnt so shy and lonely, i dont really have any1 to talk to in real life thats very close to me andi feel so left out even tho i try so hard to fit in. the sad thing is the person im closest to lives in dominican republic when i live in north carolina..iv never met this person in real life but hes my best friend on the computer.
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im 15, &iThink i suffer from anxiety but im not sure ... for the past two years i've been extremely nervous and cautious about my health (this was in 07 after my aunt died) but for the past 3 or 4 months its gotten extremly worst i feel like this weird sensation in my head all day i have very short episodes of deja vu every now & then not often & ii have these weird muscle tremors like my muscles are just shaking ... i'm concerned i may be having seizures or a brain tumor or something ? can somebody help
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The first thing I want to say is that it suprised me when I was reading this, becuase I can relate to all of you. I'm now 18. I have a year of failed university behind me. I like to think I choose my friends carefully. My best friend, Corbin we'll call him, and I were sitting at a park when out of nowhere he said to me "Andrew, you have social anxiety. I have ADD." After talking for a while we both came to the consensus that he was right.

My universty career was a downward spiral. I went to the cheepest university in Canada and it showed. The people there really didn't give a sh*t about anyone but themselevs, and that was a great hinder to me. I started out going to all my classes, getting my work done, all that good stuff. about a month or two in I decided to sleep in one day, that was when it all started to go downhill.

To give you a bit of background on where I am now, I will tell you of the situation that my homestead is in. I'm back from university and I'm back living at home with my parents. My parents. It must have been in grade 9 or 10 that my father took me out to lunch. We went somewhere that we had never gone to before, ate food that we've never eaten before. I knew something was wrong right away, you could almost see past his distant look. He informed me over that meal that him and my mother were seperating, he wanted to know how I felt about this. I'm a very understanding person and I knew for a while was was going on, so I told him that I understood what was going on and told him whatever he needs to do, he should do. It's a year after I've graduated from highschool and things here have gotten no better. I have an 11 year old sister who is taking the brunt of all of this and i'm worried where that will steer her. They keep making exuses to stay miserable, it seems.

anyways, back to university. my first simester there was something else. I stayed with "BG", a drunken slob who showered only when he absolutely needed to, and expected his mother to still be doing his laundry. what a simester. I would be awoken by him on many nights coming back from the campus bar, too drunk to undress himself.

maybe that's what I can't sleep at night now.

I could handle that for about 2 months, before the day where I slept in and found out that nobody really cares. The sleeping in only got worse, and that lead to me going to bed later. that in turn lead to me not only getting very good at pool on the table downstairs, but also to hanging out with a new crowd of people. This is why I now smoke both ciggs and pot, neither of which I did before. I also tried E once, curious drug. can't say I'll do it again though.

I went back the second simester with a new room mate and new plans for university, but my parents pulled out. I'm a late baby, 29th of december. If you think that I havn't been picked on for being young, you're wrong. If you think I havn't been picked on for being a ginger, you're wrong. all my life. I've learned to deal with it, but my parents have always been a big backing to my life. when they pulled out on me I fell apart and the seems. that's when I gave in. that's when I started to smoke, started to not care. that's when I hit an all time low.

you could count the classes I went to that simester on one hand, the grades I got back you could count in your head. My parents still think (what?) that I did it on purpose, wanted to fail, did it to hurt them. I don't know. I just wanted to make them proud.

It's 8:34 AM in the morning, I got up yesterday at 8:30 PM ish. how messed up is that. I am so tired, and so fatigued. but I just can't sleep. I can lay there for hours on end until my eyes hurt behind closed lids and I will not find sleep. or it will not find me. either one. either way, it sucks. hard. how can you get a solid job if you can't sleep at night. how can you socialize on a regular basis if the majority of your time spent away is when everyone else in the small insignificant community you live in is asleep? you can't.

My parents want nothing to do with me, I have nowhere to go. I plan on moving out with Corbin when he graduates highschool in a few weeks, I hope that works.

did I forget to mention that my father crashed my car? how ironic is that, teenagers are always put in the spotlight for being careful with their parents cars, and look at what happened to me. the best part is, sinse my parents are always at eachothers throat, my mother took him off of the insurance! NOW I HAVE NOTHING!!!! no car. no freedom. she just leased a new civic. you should see the hell I go through to ge to drive that car.

the only escapes I have had for all of these years, were friends and games. I don't know if you have played many online games, but it can lead to frustration. frustration leads to swearing. swearing, in this house, leads to people jumping down my throat. I can do nothing with freedom. I can do nothing without being critizied. I can do nothing without being told that I can do nothing.

you see my problem, I hope.

I have no idea how I just wrote all of that, sorry for the long post.

peace.
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