I got a question here, I'm a teeager, 15 years old. Since I was around 10 years old I had this same lust towards guys who are cool (a.k.a. "swag"). And i tried to change myself but it feels like I love this feeling. But I knoe I'm not gay cause any other ordinary guy, I don't seem to like them. So, am I the only one with this problem and is there a solution? I keep fapping thought also as I most of the time can't take it.
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Hi Kenneth
You can't really change the feelings you have towards certain people or who you are naturally attracted to. It sounds like the issue could be more related to coming to terms with the attraction you have towards certain types of guys. This attraction you have for guys with swag started pretty young and like you said trying to change yourself didn't do anything and it is a feeling that you love and really can't control. The fact that it is only a certain type of guy that you are attracted to really means nothing you didn't mention if you have any feelings like this towards girls but if you do it probably is only a certain type of girl that you are attracted to. Your not the only one that is attracted to certain types of guys and who you find attractive is something that is out of your control.
It may help you to try and accept that you have this attraction to cool guys rather than trying to convince yourself that you want to change who you are.
You can try to change yourself but no doubt all you would end up doing is continuing to live in denial.
You can't really change the feelings you have towards certain people or who you are naturally attracted to. It sounds like the issue could be more related to coming to terms with the attraction you have towards certain types of guys. This attraction you have for guys with swag started pretty young and like you said trying to change yourself didn't do anything and it is a feeling that you love and really can't control. The fact that it is only a certain type of guy that you are attracted to really means nothing you didn't mention if you have any feelings like this towards girls but if you do it probably is only a certain type of girl that you are attracted to. Your not the only one that is attracted to certain types of guys and who you find attractive is something that is out of your control.
It may help you to try and accept that you have this attraction to cool guys rather than trying to convince yourself that you want to change who you are.
You can try to change yourself but no doubt all you would end up doing is continuing to live in denial.
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Yea, thanks for your explanation. I do also have a little atrraction to a few types of girls.
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Hi Kenneth
I hope I did not offend you when I replied to your post I am thinking some of it you didn't want to hear but no doubt pretty much knew already.
Part of puberty and growing and developing is figuring out or discovering your sexuality and with your attraction for cool guys starting at around ten it is just part of you learning who you are and who you are attracted to.
It will be an endless and very stressful battle for you to try and dismiss or continue denying these feelings you have.
It's hard say If you will end up having the same attraction to girls but be honest with yourself. If you are naturally attracted to girls that's fine but if you are trying to convince yourself and others that you are because it is what is expected and deemed normal. then your just stressing yourself out and living a lie.
If you have already figured out your sexuality Kenneth or not it will become very clear to you and if the answer is something that you have to come to terms with look for LGBT support and try to accept yourself just the way you are. Wish you all the best and there is absolutely nothing wrong with having this attraction, embrace and accept who you are, not who you were hoping to be because it is what is expected.
I hope I did not offend you when I replied to your post I am thinking some of it you didn't want to hear but no doubt pretty much knew already.
Part of puberty and growing and developing is figuring out or discovering your sexuality and with your attraction for cool guys starting at around ten it is just part of you learning who you are and who you are attracted to.
It will be an endless and very stressful battle for you to try and dismiss or continue denying these feelings you have.
It's hard say If you will end up having the same attraction to girls but be honest with yourself. If you are naturally attracted to girls that's fine but if you are trying to convince yourself and others that you are because it is what is expected and deemed normal. then your just stressing yourself out and living a lie.
If you have already figured out your sexuality Kenneth or not it will become very clear to you and if the answer is something that you have to come to terms with look for LGBT support and try to accept yourself just the way you are. Wish you all the best and there is absolutely nothing wrong with having this attraction, embrace and accept who you are, not who you were hoping to be because it is what is expected.
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