Alright, last night i was with this guy, we started kissing and he started putting his hand up my skirt and started to play with my clit (which was actually really sore) and then he started to finger me when i wasnt even wet.
At some time he fingered be really hard and went deep inside, so to cut the long story short, my problem is that my vagina is really sore at the moment (like i cant walk properly) and the lips of my vagina is swollen and sticking out.
Is that normal? could he have damaged anything like ripped any tissues etc coz i wasnt wet?
please reassure me...
missM
At some time he fingered be really hard and went deep inside, so to cut the long story short, my problem is that my vagina is really sore at the moment (like i cant walk properly) and the lips of my vagina is swollen and sticking out.
Is that normal? could he have damaged anything like ripped any tissues etc coz i wasnt wet?
please reassure me...
missM
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This probably should be answered by a female, but since none are handy at the moment, I'll jump in.
Is it normal to have your vagina hurt by an unfeeling, insensitive lout? NO!
Is it normal to have your sex organs rubbed raw? NO!
Could he have damaged anything like ripped any tissues? Let's see now...You're so sore you can't walk properly. YEP, that sounds like damage to me!
The bottom line is this. If you're not turned on enough to be wet, then you've got to let the guy know that he needs to either stop, or be more patient. If you've got some lube handy, USE it. There's little more frustrating that having a turned on partner who doesn't get that YOU'RE NOT!
My experience is that if my partner gets a little lube in/on her, she'll respond MUCH better than if we press on.
I cringe to think what it must have been like to be so roughly entered and violated.
The word rape springs to mind, but I won't presume to judge.
Next time, MissM, please speak up and tell him to STOP! You're in control... not him! Right? 8-|
Is it normal to have your vagina hurt by an unfeeling, insensitive lout? NO!
Is it normal to have your sex organs rubbed raw? NO!
Could he have damaged anything like ripped any tissues? Let's see now...You're so sore you can't walk properly. YEP, that sounds like damage to me!
The bottom line is this. If you're not turned on enough to be wet, then you've got to let the guy know that he needs to either stop, or be more patient. If you've got some lube handy, USE it. There's little more frustrating that having a turned on partner who doesn't get that YOU'RE NOT!
My experience is that if my partner gets a little lube in/on her, she'll respond MUCH better than if we press on.
I cringe to think what it must have been like to be so roughly entered and violated.
The word rape springs to mind, but I won't presume to judge.
Next time, MissM, please speak up and tell him to STOP! You're in control... not him! Right? 8-|
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Kirk is correct, there is nothing worse than having someone try to put something into your vagina, be it a finger or a penis, with no assistance, meaning lubrication.
Dr. Ruth once said, if you have no lubrication, use your own spit. I know, eewww, but think about it. We perform oral sex on each other, we suck each others tongues, we do put our mouths in those places, so why not use our spit?
Dry sex is painful as you already know. It leaves you with the feeling that your genitals weigh 100 pounds, (not really) but you understand.
This guy really needs to learn something about female sexuality, but in the meantime, take some warm soaks in the tub and you will start to feel better.
Dr. Ruth once said, if you have no lubrication, use your own spit. I know, eewww, but think about it. We perform oral sex on each other, we suck each others tongues, we do put our mouths in those places, so why not use our spit?
Dry sex is painful as you already know. It leaves you with the feeling that your genitals weigh 100 pounds, (not really) but you understand.
This guy really needs to learn something about female sexuality, but in the meantime, take some warm soaks in the tub and you will start to feel better.
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So I know these post are a bit old now... but i'm going to post something anyways..
A few nights ago I was with my boyfriend, we are not yet sleeping together; however, we have been getting closer. Usually i'm wet before he starts at it; however, he is still somewhat rough. I have to remind him every now and then to be more gentle and he always respects what I ask. But being my first boyfriend this is all kind of new and weird so I wasn't sure how any of this was supposed to really feel..
Even when i'm wet-- it can still be a little painful. I thought this was just me being a little inexperienced; however, the next day I woke up sore! Not a constant pain, but it feels as though I have a cut somewhere and I can't quite exactly find the exact location.
Is this sometime I need to have treated? I figured there really wasn't anything I could do... but if so...then i'd like to do it!
I agree with the previously made comments...he shouldn't be so rough and I shouldn't just let it happen.. I already spoke to him about it and I think he just doesn't realize-- but honestly i'm in no rush of being touched anytime soon because of this, so we will see if he remembers... because i'm not going through this BS again!
thank you very much!
A few nights ago I was with my boyfriend, we are not yet sleeping together; however, we have been getting closer. Usually i'm wet before he starts at it; however, he is still somewhat rough. I have to remind him every now and then to be more gentle and he always respects what I ask. But being my first boyfriend this is all kind of new and weird so I wasn't sure how any of this was supposed to really feel..
Even when i'm wet-- it can still be a little painful. I thought this was just me being a little inexperienced; however, the next day I woke up sore! Not a constant pain, but it feels as though I have a cut somewhere and I can't quite exactly find the exact location.
Is this sometime I need to have treated? I figured there really wasn't anything I could do... but if so...then i'd like to do it!
I agree with the previously made comments...he shouldn't be so rough and I shouldn't just let it happen.. I already spoke to him about it and I think he just doesn't realize-- but honestly i'm in no rush of being touched anytime soon because of this, so we will see if he remembers... because i'm not going through this BS again!
thank you very much!
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Missmilla,
You seem to have a good grasp of the situation, so there's not much more to tell you.
Except to recommend that you not go any farther than you feel comfortable. If that means telling him to slow down, or knock it off for a while until you get aroused, so be it.
Second, you could invest in a bottle of lube in the event that you want to continue, but are not experiencing enough lubrication. It doesn't HAVE to result in intercourse... and if you're talking about fingering...well, it ALWAYS goes better with some lube.
You seem to have a good grasp of the situation, so there's not much more to tell you.
Except to recommend that you not go any farther than you feel comfortable. If that means telling him to slow down, or knock it off for a while until you get aroused, so be it.
Second, you could invest in a bottle of lube in the event that you want to continue, but are not experiencing enough lubrication. It doesn't HAVE to result in intercourse... and if you're talking about fingering...well, it ALWAYS goes better with some lube.
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