What to Do About the Pain of a Broken Heart

It makes sense to take a pain reliever when you feel emotional pain. Where you can get into trouble is by taking large doses or multiple pain relievers when you feel the heartbreak of rejection.

• Never take more medicine than is recommended on the label. Taking large doses won't work faster or make you feel better.
• Don't take pain relievers if you are taking prescription medications to help you through a crisis, unless they are compatible with your prescription medications (that is, your doctor or your pharmacist tells you that they are).
• Don't take more than one brand of over the counter painkiller at a time, that is, at any time in the same day. They can have similar ingredients that can be too much for your liver to process.
• If you are "drowning your sorrows," drinking alcohol to relieve emotional pain, don't take over the counter pain relievers on the same day. Your body needs time to process either the pain relievers or the alcohol to avoid toxicity.

Beyond taking a pill to relieve your pain, there are commonsense measures that make a difference in getting over emotional pain in the long run.

• It doesn't do any good to pretend you don't feel awful. Psychogenic pain is real, and merits efforts at relief.
• It is harmful to keep reliving the connections that you have lost. At an extreme, some people keep going to an ex's favorite restaurant hoping they will somehow magically show up, or insist on keeping their weekends open in case their formerly beloved should want to go out, or celebrating their anniversaries with the lover or spouse who left them. These kinds of behaviors suggest a need for therapeutic intervention. But stronger people need to move on, too. Don't turn on the music or the television program you used to watch with your ex. Move the furniture around, or out of the house. Take up new activities.
• Exercise. Movement is a great way to deal with depression, even if it's just taking a walk. (If you and your ex used to take long walks together, however, it would probably be better to get your exercise through a different activity.)
• Believe in your ability to find love again, and get out to find it.

READ Ten Ways To Avoid Getting Addicted To Opioid Painkillers

When does emotional pain merit professional intervention? Generally, if you don't experience pain you cause yourself but you experience the others cause you as catastrophic, or you take pain relievers (including alcohol) when you anticipate rejection, there's a fundamental issue that needs some work. Particularly worrisome are any behaviors involving self-harm, such as cutting, binge and purge eating patterns, obsession with exercise, or profound obesity. And, frankly, if you are inclined to stalk your ex, you need help. The interconnections of these activities with brain function and social experience are very complex and require the help of a medical professional.  

Most people, fortunately, don't turn breakups into catastrophes. A few capsules of Tylenol probably can help you through the pain of a breakup, but see a counselor if you don't get past this pain in six weeks.