Hi i am currently on 18mg of methadone, i have been on roughly 8yrs now i want of this stuff, because i think it is making me depressed. I get weekly takhomes and they are undiluted, so i can take out 1mg here or there, apart from when i go in and drink the dose once a week. I want to try taper myself because if i let the pharmacist know i cannot go back up again. Do you think i will be ok just using 1/2 my dose like 9mg or something. What is the best way to do it at home so i can see how i will go? i just dont have the patience to do 1mg a week, its like a long drawn out process, i had a slight increase not long ago but i think it maybe actually making me worse, i hate this stuff it gets to the point i go every week and have a severe panic attack because i don't want to go and get another weeks worth. This last few yrs has been a real struggle on it for some reason. I think i just want my old freedom back badly, i used to take klonopin before the methadone and at least that was not as restricting as this program it's awful like being a prisoner to the government. My klonopin i just took with me and it lasted a month or so , i hate having to go to the pharmacy under these conditions , and i cant travel or do anything i like, or like i used too do years ago before methadone. I just want the hell of it and quick but i am afraid i will be really sick least i am not on 100mg or like some people . I cannot settle for a life like this for another 8years it's to much, i also have anxiety issues any advice please this is no life.