Am I the bad guy here??

alright, straight to business. Me and my gf have been together for about a year now. We hadn't started having sexual relations until we had been together for about 5 months. Early into our relationship I had asked her if she was still a virgin and she had said she was. I was too. I had made a goal for myself, however. I wanted my first time to be with a person who I loved and a person that I was in a serious relationship with. I also wanted to be that persons first, mainly because in my mind it would have made the moment alot more special. Many months after we had sex. (3-4 months after) one of her friends had mentioned that she had talked about sleeping with some guy right before she met me. And the thought of being lied to like this, for so long, and so many times, (I had asked a few times after because I had heard people say she had and I wanted to make sure) it angered me, so I confronted her about it and she finally spilled the beans. At first I wasn't nearly as mad as I thought I would be... Until she told me thatshe still regularly talked to him. I kinda flipped out and I almost broke up with her. There was a long fight about it and things weren't resolved for a while. Now I wouldn't have been so angry if she wasn't still talking to him, and I had told her before we had sex about my goal. I told her I wanted her to stop talking to him and she just tarted complaining that I was too controlling. But isnt that a common request? Eventually I gave in an let her talk to him but now he's coming to town and he wants to meet up with him. I'm uncomfortable with it but I don't wann be called controlling. If I told her I didn't want her to would that be too much to ask? He also wanted to take her on a trip but I shot that down quickly. I wanna know, was it right of me to get mad in the first place and should I put my foot down on this situation???