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Ive gone back out with a girl who I had a relationship almost three years ago ( she persued me ) and weve been in a relationship for the last three months
however ,
Ive gotton upset over the last few months as she wants to stay friends with her ex that she had seen in the mean time after me.
it wouldnt particularly bother me but when she was seeing him , she said that he was the first guy she really liked since me .
As a result , Its gotton me depressed and ive had to see my doctor - she says that its a " perfectly reasonable reaction to an unreasonable situation " - the situation of them seeing each other in the mean time . Ive said this to her and she says that she
has a bond with him as a result of their mutual friend who died and that they just go to the cemetary together - i offered to go with her instead and she did not want this ?however she says that shes sorry that shes caused this hardship and that she will stop talking to him ive found out that since she has been talking to him on a few occasions and ive said to her that if it happens again that this relationship wont work .Am i being too controlling ?or am i feeling very insecure about the whole situation ?

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To be completely honest I agree with you. If I were in your situation I would feel very uncomfortable with my girlfriend (or in my case boyfriend) seeing/hanging out with their ex ESPECIALLY if she said that he was the first one she really liked since you. I know that you're supposed to trust her and know that she won't do anything with him but for some reason (perhaps it's just me) ex's really seem to make me uncomfortable UNLESS I know then and have hung out with them along with my boyfriend. Perhaps you can try tagging along and seeing how they interact and how the other guy treats the situation. I think that would be a good common ground for you to become more comfortable with the situation but I do think that if she isn't willing to hang out with both of you something is wrong. Also if she doesn't stop hanging out with him because you feel uncomfortable about it, did you try talking to her about the occasions you know she talked to him when she said she wouldn't?
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