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I have been involved for about a year now, with a man that is on suboxone. I did not know about him using this drug early in our dating. Although nothing has been easy in this relationship I now know one of the reasons why. I have been as supportive as I can but it and I have compassion for him, but the reliance on this medicine is really wearing on him and our relationship. I have read message boards and am trying to learn all I can. I do realize how addictive and dependant this drug has become and will continue to be. My question is this? Is there help or forums for supporters of suboxone? Can a loved one help me to understand how they are being supportive? I can't bear to walk away from him. He really is all alone and has no one. He has lost his child because of his addiction and his depression is very hard to deal with. I do love him and all I want to do is be there for him but it is really interferring with me and the livelihood of my children and family. He sleeps for most of the day and sometimes does not even call or check in. It seems to be getting worse. I have many fears and im frightened daily.He ran out of the drug a few months ago and the withdrawal was so frightening for me (and of course for him). And severely painfull for him. I'm scared and do not know where to turn. I am a nurturer by nature but I find myself becoming depressed. I know I will never understand how it "feels" being on this drug. I have battled my own addictions of meth and alcohol. I pray for all of you on this drug that are hurting and in pain. I also pray that they will come up with a detox that will help for the dependancy. I hope not to offend those who are hurting but i did nt know where to turn and I want more than anything for my boyfriend and all of you to be well.

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i read your post. looks like you posted a while ago but ihope that you find my message. my bf is almost all done with his suboxone detox. it has been getting harder for him and me. i'm not detoxing but not being able to help him with all the pain he's experiencing, his detachment because his pain is too great to be affectionate to me, all those things. i don't know how to deal with them without taking it personal. i got on the computer today to do som research because right now i have to remind myself its about him not me. and i need to learn about what i'm dealing with.
support would be great
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I was doing some research on the internet and saw your post. My fiance has been on suboxine since december '06 and tried to come off of it last week.{march} I think he tried to get off at 2mg. He was fine the first day, but the next two days were hell for him. He was shaking really bad, sweaty, and so anxious. I didnt know how to help him or what to say to make him feel better. He didnt want to be touched but didnt want to want to be alone. He almost relapsed on the fourth day and jumped back on the suboxine that same day at 1mg. He seems to be back to the guy I know and love but that was a scary week. If he would have relapsed it would have been all over, I cant lose him-he is the greatist. The suboxine makes him normal and he wants to take it forever. is this possible? or what can i do to support him not babysit him if he tries to get off it again? he was a heroin addict for 8 years before I met him and he has a high potential for relapse-What can I do to help relapse not happen?
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i am currently on subonxone myself...have been for almost 2 and a half years. i've been doing the whole gradual tappering thing and it seems to be going well. i wanted to respond to the girl that wrote about how she could support her husband/boyfriend get off when he is ready to. first off, you said, "he has a high potential for relapse"---i was a heroin addict for almost 7 years myself so i understand what the whole process is all about. what do you mean exactly that's he has a high potential for relapse? for me, 50% of the battle was removing myself from the environment...meaning, i had to move away from the people, places and things that i associated with getting high...not so much because it was a mental obstacle but because each time i tried to get clean...one of those factors drew me right back in. it's hard to stay clean when you know how to "score" that which you have a weakness for. i wish you the very best and i hope that both of you will come out the other side of this stronger than before. it's good to talk to those that understand...it's good for you AND it's good for him. try and offer him unconditional love and support and know that when times are tough, it WILL get better. it takes time to heal just as it took time to get in the mess we find ourselves in. i hope some of what i said helps you. please consider getting him out of the environment that tempts him and find a distraction...that can be anything from exercise to playing music (guitar, drums, ect...) to sex...whatever
so long as it's healthy and keeps your mind off of what ales you.

-k
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I have taken just about everything under the sun. I am now stuck with suboxone. He won't go away. Neither will xanax. I was put in a detox for opiate and benzo's. Xanax is the worst and best drug ever. STAY away from xanax. It is extremely addicting and the withdrawl is depressing. When given an opportunity for a shot at sobriety....TAKE IT. Don't do drugs. I am on my way to working out and allowing my wife and kids fill that void. I am given an opportunity to turn things around. I have to do it and not look back. Drugs destroy lives. Find a way to become medically stabilzed. No benzo's, opiates, etc. They just make the cycle continue. Becoming chemically dependent is a b***h and takes A LONG time to be back to normal. A healthy way to eat. Allow those who love you in.
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My boyfriend is on suboxone, has been taking it for about 7 months now. He has to take Viagra to get an erection. I thought once he was done with the heroin, he would get back to the way he was before he relapsed and the only thing that has changed is that he takes suboxone instead of shooting heroin. Even the same losers come around begging suboxone off of him when they can't find any dope and are sick. I am really frustrated and when I try to address the sexual issues, he becomes upset and accuses me of not being patient and tells me that I have to be accepting of his suboxone therapy and focus on the good it brings (not doing dope) and not the bad (no sex still, maybe only once a month at most). And when I get mad at the people coming around to beg the suboxone from him he gets defensive and says they are his friends and they're addicts and sick and he can't stand to see any one suffer. It took us 8 long months on a waiting list to get him into see this doctor, and cost me some bucks, am I wrong for having these feelings? I resent him for taking my sex life away from me. Am I being a b***h?
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Just wanted you guys to know that I am now married to the love of my life for 5 years. A couple months after we began dating I found out that he took rx pain pills. It wasn't very many at the time. Time went by the amount and frequency of the pills increased. He went on methadone to try to get off the pills. As he weened off of methadone he began taking pills again. Pills turned in to heroin. March of 2008 he began taking suboxone. On and off of the time from March to December of 2008 he would take heroin in spurts. We got engaged in July of 2008 (when he wasn't using) I almost left him when he went back to heroin in December 08. We began premarital counseling in February and he hasn't touched heroin since. Suboxon has been great for him and he is weening off of it now. He started at 32 mgs. and now is at 24 mgs. He's doing wonderful. We got married in Aug 2009. I know we'll have battles to come across in the future, but he is worth it.


To all of you suboxone user- lovers just ask yourself if he/she is worth your worst day/week times a million. If they are.... you'll work through it. If you want sex and he or she just can't perform get over it and wait for another day. My hubby and I have problems with sex only when he takes it 1-2 hours before we have sex. Then he can't get hard or he can't ejaculate. I know that there are other times. Sex isn't the entire part of our relationship. Just like him using suboxone isn't the whole part either. Its just a percentage of the whole. We care about eachother and talk about whats bothering us. But I suggest that you don't get on his case about not being able to have sex right after you try. His ego is probably damaged as much as yours. if I can help with anything. :-D
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My boyfriend has been taking suboxone 2 and a half years. I started going out with him around the same time. He was completely honest with me about his addiction. He was addicted to morphine and heroine. He has not touched heroine or morphine since we have been together but very occasionaly takes ecstasy and went through a stage of smoking cannabis. He no longer takes cannabis and hasn't taken ecstasy for at least 6 months... that I could handle. What I am struggling with is the fact that he has had a long addiction to valium on top of this which has led to him lying to me and buying it from the street, even though he gets prescribed it aswell. He has told me twice before how bad it had got (120mg per day!!), only after he had been caught with lies and he was able to slowly come off them. Just recently he admitted to me that he is back up to this rediculous amount and has lied to me again. I have always been very supportive and sympathetic and I love him deeply. On top of the valium he is on anti-depressants and he is difficult to deal with sometimes. He took 6 weeks off his work at Christmas and I thought everything was fine, but it's not. We can't focus on bringing him off suboxone just now while he is on the valium as I fear this will push him over the edge. We can't afford the amount he's been spending on it and it is ultimately going to ruin us. Not so much because of the addiction, but because of the lies. I have been at my wits end and I gave him an ultimatum (me or the drugs). I know he wants the same things as I do... a mortgage, marriage and a drug free realationship, but the light at the end of the tunnel gets blurry every time he goes back to vallium and gets into a slump. He has started CBT and seeked advise and hopefully in 6 weeks time he will be off the vallium. Addiction is a long road and will truely test the strength of a relationship. I went back to college in September to get a degree in learning difficulties so that I can ultimately get a rewarding job working in the community. It's difficult at times trying to get a good career, have a part time job and difficulties with my partner but I still hope that we can have the future together that we both deserve. Addiction is like a deamon lurking in the background that pops up when you are most vulnerable... don't let it beat you!
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My boyfriend and I have been together for three years now, and for all that time he has been doing something. When we 1st got together he was going to a clin to get meth, he had to stop due to funding. he went off fast, and it was bad for the detoxing. then he went back to work and started suboxen, only bout 2mg a day to not jones for what he really wanted. he has sliped a few times, but mostly has just stayed on the sobos.
33 days ago he said he did not want to do them anymore! just like that, he was done. he is doing well, but is still detoxing. this time he is the one who wants it, not due to money issues or me wanting it, but i am afraid that he maystart up again due to the way he is still feeling!! we have a son together and i have two from before him, they have no clue. they do see a change in him, he was being short with them, but i have seen it getting better. does anyone know how long the detoxing takes? he is still doing the bathroom thing, not really sleeping, cold all the time. let me know, soi cangive him the hope he needs toget though this. for him and for our family.
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I know this is a while from your original post but I am in the same situation. You nailed it when you said not to take it personally, but how can you do that? The emotional withdrawal, anger outbursts and disassociation is so difficult. I'm finding it harder and harder to be supportive. Knowing that its not me and that others are going through this is a little helpful.
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Hi...my fiancé has been on suboxine for just over a year started at 8mg and when he first came home after detoxing from methadone he couldn't get enough sex I was so happy as our relationship has never been sexual because of the medication he has been on but once the suboxine kicked in although he functions good his head is all cloudy and could care less about sex...I want a sexual relationship with him and this is all a sensitive matter and he gets super defensive when I try and talk to him about what I want from him which is what all women want...intimacy..sex...I don't know what to do I love him with all my heart! He got testosterone gel from his dr and it wasn't helping so he just got testosterone injections and the dose the dr gave him is low...does anyone know if this will help? Or any other suggestions. We want a family...I can't wait much longer I love him and I really want us to be more intimate and full fill each other's needs...I have stuck by his side through it all and I want nothing more then to be his wife and life partner please help!
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Advice pls!!!!! I'm drifting from him.
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