Dennis had been struggling with a sex addiction for many years. In his late 30's, he wanted to get married and have a family, and he realized that turning to the Internet for his gratification was keeping his frequency too low to attract the kind of woman he wanted to marry.
Dennis was one of those people who believed he was weak if he asked for help, and also that he was entitled for a woman to take care of his needs for sex and love. The combination of these two false beliefs kept Dennis from being able to receive help and strength from his spiritual Guidance, and he kept making women his higher power - his source of love.
None of this was working for him.
Dennis finally decided to try turning to his Guidance for the support and strength he needed to take loving care of himself. In a phone session with me, he stated, "This last week I've been asking Spirit for the strength to let go of the sexual addiction. I'm amazed at what's happening! Not only have I been able to not use the Internet, but I've been able to not use women as well. I'm no longer hanging on to a woman whom I know I don't want to marry just to get sex or attention from her."
"Dennis, what does it feel like in your heart when you open to your Guidance for strength?"
"I feel a warmth in my heart. It feels full of love. The moment I ask for the help and the strength, the neediness and emptiness go away and I feel full inside."
It had taken Dennis quite a long time to finally decide to risk opening to Spirit. For a long time, Spirit was something he talked about or read about, but didn't experience. It is a big challenge for most of us to truly open to Spirit - to risk knowing whether or not that love and strength and wisdom is actually here for us. You can believe it is, but until you open to learning with Spirit and ask for the help you need, it is just a belief - not a knowing.
The wounded self has many reasons to not open to Guidance for the love and strength and truth. Surrendering is the last thing that the wounded self wants to do, as the very basis of the wounded self is control. So your wounded self will warn you that your Guidance will tell you to sell everything and volunteer in Africa. Or, that your Guidance is a fabrication of man, a crutch to avoid the realities of life. Or that if you open and discover there is nothing there, you will really know that you are alone in the universe and there will be no hope left.
Opening to Spirit feels very risky to the wounded self, so it is vital to remember that your wounded self is the programmed part of you, filled with false beliefs. It is vital to remember that your wounded self is the voice of ignorance, not the voice of truth.
Spirit is here for you, for each of us every moment of every day. I hope you open and begin to feel the comfort and strength that Dennis is finally feeling.