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It seems that OCD has slowly become a solid and not-ever-leaving part of my life. I always have to check at least for three times if I have brought my wallet and documents. I have to triple check if I have locked the door etc. I use antidepressants and they do help with intrusive thoughts. I wonder, will I ever be ok? I am also starting with therapy sessions next week.

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The good thing is that you are willing to talk about your problem. That is one important step toward reaching the solution. You do not know how many people out there are aware about their illnesses but are afraid to go to the doctor. They are ashamed and afraid of the reaction of the people around them, family, colleagues I have fought with stress several years ago and I have won. I used both meds and therapy sessions it worked!
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Hi, I am not a counselor but I can tell you that there is help. I don't know a lot about OCD, but from experiencing obsessive thoughts I believe the problem is in freaking out that you are having these thoughts about doing something that is totally against your moral principles. You may think that you want to actually do what you are thinking or that you may behave according to the thought. This is all bunk. In reality, people that experience OCD are the last people to act on the thoughts. You are not going crazy - almost everyone has these crazy thoughts but most people are just able to realize that the thought is meaningless. It is only when you start worrying about it (and rumenating on it) that you feed the monster. Here is a link to an article that helped me out immensely! This doctor dedicates himself to the treatment of OCD - and people with pure obsessive thoughts - which I was dealing with. The link is at:

http://www.ocdonline.com/articlephillipson1.php

The key for me was when the thought came, don't rumenate on it - just ignore it or say "so what - that isn't what I really believe and that thought does not define me" - and drop it quickly. I was not perfect in this area - it took lots of practice over a few weeks and there were some setbacks. The weird thing - as explained in this article is that when you do not rumenate on the thought, the thoughts will come more rapidly and regularly - it is like there is something feeding these thoughts and trying to desperately keep you in bondage (is it in our brain? is it spiritual?.. I don't know). It isn't the trigger thought that is the problem - it is the rumenation. After you deny the trigger thought by not rumenating on it over and over and over, eventually it will give up - at least that is what the author says and what I experienced. Again, I'm no doctor - all I know is that it helped me so I thought I'd pass it on.

Also remember that God loves you so much! He does not want you in bondage.
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